My name is Oliver, you can call me Ollie. I am a creature, use whatever pronouns. I like writing sometimes and this is my blog for it. This is mostly for me but likes and reblogs are appreciated! I will also try to do requests if I get any!
LADS!Caleb×GN!Reader/MC. LADS!Zayne and LADS!Xavier mentioned.
» Content/Warnings:
Mentions of death, this is about MC's grieving process after the explosion of Caleb. Depressive behavior's including recklessness, irritation, suicidal ideation, poor hygiene/self care, self harm, isolation, thoughts of despair. Survivors Guilt.
» Authors Note:
A friend of mine passed away February 28th 2025. I have a lot of feelings and I am processing them the best I can. I haven't written something in awhile and I figured my specialty is angst, so why not cope with what I write best? Angst. Update mid writing: Another friend of mine died June 17th 2025. More reason to write this. Another mid writing update: I'm okay chat dw lol.
Waking up in the hospital was horrid enough for you. The lights and sounds, not knowing what was happening, where you were, how you got there, and why everything hurt. The only thing that kept you from full blown panic was Zaynes presence, making sure you were well taken care of and most importantly alive. Yet, what scared you most was no one answering your questions.
"Where's Grandma? Caleb? They were in the house Zayne, please. Are they okay?"
Your voice was broken, begging and pleading with the only person you could trust right now with tears and terror in your eyes. His gaze never met yours, he was stiffer, quieter. Part of you already knew, already started mourning them, but you held hope. Maybe they were just in critical condition and he didn't want to give you false hope? Or were they just focused on keeping you awake? You didn't know. Not knowing was scary. Especially when everyone around you looked just as scared, like the truth was just as bad as the unknown.
It was.
"MC....I'm so sorry."
Zayne's soft voice was barely above the whisper as he said those words, looking at you with the saddest eyes you've ever seen. He held your hand and said the words you never wanted to hear, "They're dead. I'm so sorry."
When told their loved ones have died most cry or scream. You...didn't. You just sat there. Not dazed just. Thinking. The way your heart burned didn't make sense, you should be crying but you weren't. You felt fine? They are dead and you feel nothing? How horrible of a person were you.
Your head slowly bobbed up and down with a nod before you finally lay down on your hospital bed. Your head swirls with memories with no emotion attached. Your body aches and everything hurts, your bones feel heavy and your skin feels raw. Nothing felt as bad as the empty hole that was slowly opening up inside you. A void. Black pit.
You don't know how long you laid there, falling in and out of sleep, eating when told, and taking whatever medicine they gave you at random. Everything was a haze until Zayne brought the paper for discharge.
He was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at you with the most expressive expression you've seen in him in a long while. His hands were gentle, like you were made of glass, as he rubbed your back. He explained the process of everything: your recovery plan, the memorial and funeral for your loved ones. For Caleb.
"Do you..." He looked at you with the softest eyes, '
"Wish for company? I can help you recover and support you for a bit if you'd like."
For a second, the haze faded and you realized how different you felt. How broken and scared you were. You nodded ever so slightly, worried that if you did anything more something buried inside you would claw you apart. He nods and leaves briefly as you change into clothes that Xavier apparently brought you. You don't remember when he visited but maybe you were asleep. It was a slow and physically painful process but by the time you were done Zayne was back with his car keys and other belongings.
You're in your house by the time you come back to reality. You don't know where you go when you're not present, you kind of don't exist. Just a numb shell until you come back. You look around and find Zayne cooking dinner and somehow Xavier was sitting next to you, his eyes looking at you with concern.
"Hey."
"Hi."
His hands were holding yours and rubbing soft circles into the back of your hands. He gives you a small smile, "How are you feeling?"
You sat there for a long moment. Looking at him while you try to come up with words to describe this deep overwhelming black void that was ripping your entire body apart silently. Eventually you blink and just mutter, "Tired."
There was probably a better word for this feeling. Yet, tired felt the most... Soft. Easier to explain and say and no one can really argue with you about that. You've been through hell, who are they to say you're not tired?
The days were a blur. At some point Zayne returned home, Xavier still stopped by every day. You had recovered from the explosion, full health and back to work. You seemed fine, looked okay considering the fact you survived a literal explosion. Yet on the inside you felt so many things. Anger. Guilt. Greif. Many things you couldn't explain or begin to understand. People were kind and everything but that only seemed to piss you off. Snapping at anyone who would ask if you're okay or if you're eating enough.
It makes you so fucking angry, the way people can just live their life like what happened never happened. The way life didn't pause or end the moment the explosion happened. It wasn't fair. Why did they die but not you? Why didn't they live? Why does no one else seem to care?
"Hey... You good?"
You look up from the paper you were reading at your desk, it was one of your coworkers. He looked worried, and that made you grit your teeth.
"I'm fine." You snapped.
The coworker looked at you for a moment before muttering an apology and walking away. It was like this for a long time. Skipping meals, showing up late to work, never knowing how you got places or what day it was anymore. Every single day that hole in your body just grew larger.
Missions were starting to be your favorite thing. Every time you get hurt it feels like a release. You wanted to get hurt, it felt like a fucked up kind of atonement for surviving the explosion. Like you deserved to destroy yourself and break apart. It got to the point where Xavier had to call Zayne.
I can't bring myself to finish this. It's... A lot. Maybe one day, but not today or anytime soon. Happy new year's eve/new years. Drink water and eat something. Please reach out if you are having a hard time or bad thoughts.
Bittersweet. Sad so sad, lots of suicide ideation and implied deaths and just sad. Gang this broke me to write. It's so good but so sad. Forbidden love kind of? Reader is a girl specifically because the mother is mothering. Guys it's literally just sappy sad and bittersweet. Reader has fourteen siblings lmao, just roll with it.
The Water Hashira sat silently on the mountain's edge, his blue eyes starting off into the distance. In your eyes, you could tell he was deep in thought, even if his voided expression said he was empty headed. You've been on a mission together for three days, and in those three days you've learned a lot about the Water Hashira, Giyuu Tomioka. He was kind hearted, lonely, and always so full of thoughts.
His voice broke the silence, "This is a dangerous mission. Why did you choose to accompany me? You could have denied."
You blinked from where you were swinging upside down from a tree branch. You pondered the answer to his question for a moment before speaking with a small smile, "You chose me, which means you don't think I'm weak. Besides, I'm used to dangerous missions. I'm on the Slayer Corps Suicide squad."
He glanced in your direction, watching you as you swung from the tree branch. For a moment, his expression seemed to soften slightly, maybe in pity or in general confusion, "You shouldn't be so careless with your life."
He looked forward again, his voided expression returning as he watched the water flow in the river that peeked from the trees blow the two of you. The sun wasn't up yet, but it was starting to rise ever so slowly.
"I'm not careless," You corrected him as you sat up straight on the branch with a sigh, "I just don't fear death. Knowing I could die makes living more fun, if that makes sense? It makes life have meaning to me."
You went back to dangling upside down after speaking to watch trees sway on this mountain. It was a breathtaking sight, early morning dew drops and rain clouds coming in really made this place feel comfortable. If only demons didn't exist, maybe you two could have been here for a different reason.
He glanced back at you once more, studying you as you hung upside down from the tree. He found your carefree attitude both frustrating and admirable at the same time. His expression held a hint of curiosity at your response. There was a beat of silence before he asked, "You've always been like that? Not fearing death."
"I think all my life has been surrounded with death and suffering. I suppose it's conditioned me in some way?" You said as you dropped to the ground, slightly stumbling as you went to sit next to him on the mountain's edge.
He listened to your response, pausing for a moment, as if debating whether or not to ask a question that had been on his mind for a while.
"Have you ever lost someone close to you?"
A beat of silence filled the air. You looked down at the trees below you, seeing the river peak out occasionally as your hands fidgeted with your Horai; it had at least thirty patches of cloth stitched onto the original black cloth. You replied to his question softly, "My Horai has patches for a reason."
He had never really noticed it before, but now he took a closer look at it. His eyes widened slightly as he truly comprehended the number of patches sewn onto the original black cloth of your Horai.
"Thirty... That's a lot of patches. Are they all for someone dear to you?" His voice was timid, hoping he wasn't crossing any boundary he wasn't aware of. You always seemed so carefree, gentle, open. He would hate to upset you.
"Some were dear to me, some are just those I've failed to save on a mission, comrades, demons who had no hope or no one to love them as humans." You leaned back, using your hands to keep your body up, as you stared at the sky with an unexplainable emotion in your heart. "Those that have been lost."
He watched you in silence, the stoic expression on his face wavering slightly as he listened to your words. He understood all too well the feeling of losing comrades, family, and those he was unable to save. He had seen countless deaths throughout his years as a demon slayer. But hearing it from you, someone who seemed so carefree, it hit him differently. It made his heart heavy. He looked down at the path in front of them, his thoughts consumed by your words.
"Must be a heavy weight to carry."
"It's not so bad." You said with a reassuring smile, "I'm strong so it's easier for me."
He looked back over at you, his expression softer. He could sense the underlying weight in your words, despite your dismissive attitude. You must've held an intense amount of survivors guilt, maybe even self hatred for surviving.
"Being strong isn't necessarily an advantage when it comes to carrying a burden. In fact, it can sometimes make it even harder." His gaze shifted back to the sight before the two of you. "You don't have to shoulder the burden alone, you know."
You gently shook your head, "I'm part of the demon slayer corps suicide team. I do carry it alone."
You looked at him, a happy smile on your face, "But it's okay. I enjoy every moment with my team, when I have them. We make memories that I would never forget. We fight for a good cause. And I'm proud to be here. Proud to give my life to ending the world's plague of Muzan."
Your cheerful approach to the death you're surrounded by, the possibility of your own death, stunned him. It was admirable. You had such a pure soul, a kind heart, and a strong resolve. He couldn't understand why you were a demon slayer, you should've been a beautiful wife and mother to a good man.
"You're truly a remarkable person. Most would crumble under that kind of pressure, yet you carry yourself with such grace and courage." He complimented before looking at you again, "Just remember to take care of yourself, okay?"
You looked at him for a moment, your eyes glistening like you were about to cry— but you grinned before laughing. A full body laugh, laying on the dirty mountain ground clutching your stomach. Your laughter had Giyuu shiver as he felt a wave of an unfamiliar emotion wash over him like a soft tide at the beach.
"Giyuu Tomioka, you're a beautiful soul." You said as your giggles died down. "If we weren't slayers, I'd probably have tried courting and marrying you by now."
His eyes widened at your sudden outburst and laughter, his face burned once the words you said clicked in his mind. He wasn't sure how to respond to such a compliment, not used to it whatsoever. He avoided your gaze, turning his head away and cleared his throat before mumbling a response, "You're the one with the beautiful soul, not me."
You giggled again as you watched him from where you laid. You glanced at the sky slowly being covered in rain clouds and baby rays of early morning sunshine. You raised your hands to the sky with a small soft smile, "Do you think in another life we met somewhere in the mountains like we did this life? I wonder what we were doing."
He glanced back at you, watching as you looked up at the sky, he thought for a moment about your question. Admiring you and the way you stayed so hopeful despite everything.
"Who knows. Maybe in another life we did meet in the mountains, maybe under different circumstances."
He paused, his gaze shifting back to the path ahead, "Maybe we were just two ordinary people, enjoying the peace and tranquility of the mountains."
You nodded, "If I was ordinary, I would have been a caretaker at an orphanage. What about you?"
He thought for a moment before responding, "If I was ordinary...I probably would have been a simple fisherman, living a quiet and peaceful life."
"Caretaker at an orphanage, huh?" He looked over at you, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips, "Sounds like you've always had a nurturing side."
You nodded again, sitting up with a red face, "I use to have fourteen siblings, I took care of them because our mother died after the youngest was born and our fathers left us. I was the fourth oldest but I was basically the most stable."
You smiled as you thought about your younger siblings faces, their smiles and laughter. The pure children you had once cared for. You felt tears burn your eyes but you took a deep breath and shook you head, "I've always been good with children. So if I was ordinary I would want to take care of as many as possible."
He listened intently as you spoke about your past, his eyes softened as he saw the tears well up in your beautiful eyes. He could understand the loss of a sibling, he empathized with you silently. "So you practically raised your younger siblings... That's quite a responsibility for someone so young. And fourteen of them, you must have been incredibly busy."
He paused, looking at you for awhile before whispering, "You would make a great mother, I'm sure of it."
You looked up at him with surprise and redden cheeks. It took you a moment to gather yourself, smiling with a small laugh as you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, "You think so?"
He glanced over at you, noticing the surprise and embarrassment on your face. He chuckled inwardly, finding your reaction endearing, "Yes, I do. You have a natural maternal instinct and a big heart. It's obvious that you care deeply for others and have taken on a motherly role before." His voice became delicately light as he continued, "You'd make an amazing mother, there's no doubt in my mind."
You blinked a few times before looking back down at the river farther down the mountain. A smile, a really raw and shy smile, rested on your lips. Your heart fluttered at his words, in truth you've always wanted to be a mother, but your job— the life you lived— would never allow it. You played with your hands and the breeze filled the comfortable silence between the two of you.
You found yourself wishing for that ordinary life you mention before, where Giyuu and you had met here— but for normal reasons. You wondered if you'd... Find something more in each other. If the two of you were ordinary, he would have made a beautiful and amazing husband.
He noticed your sudden shyness and the smile on your face, and he couldn't help but feel a pang of something in his chest. He knew it was dangerous to let his emotions run wild, but he found himself wondering what it would be like if things were different. He glanced over at you, watching as you played with your hands while deep in thought. Observing the way the breeze tousled your hair. He couldn't help but imagine what a life together with you would be like, if only you two were ordinary people. He shook his head slightly, clearing his thoughts and focusing back on the path ahead.
You impulsively decided to test the waters, resting your head on his shoulder as you sat on the mountain edge watching the morning sunrise together. You knew you could never be normal, not in this life. But you could get a glimpse, right? You deserved it after everything.
He was caught off guard when you suddenly laid your head on his shoulder, but at the same time, he didn't push you away. Instead, he found himself leaning into your touch, enjoying the feeling of having you so close to him.
"In our next life, let's meet again in the mountains, yeah?" You whispered as you offered your hand, holding the pinky out for the two of you to hold pinkies. The most innocent form of hand holding.
He chuckled softly at your words and the way you held out your pinky, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. He gently wrapped his pinky around yours in return.
"In our next life, we'll meet again in the mountains, I promise."
He couldn't explain why, but a sense of comfort washed over him as he made the promise with you. For a brief moment, the weight of their current reality faded away, and they were just two people pinky-promising to meet again.
...
Oh if only you could have lived that final battle, maybe you two could have been together the proper way in this life. His shaky hand locked pinkies with your cold hand, tears slipped down his face as he whispered, "In the next life, we'll meet at the mountain."
Kind of angst. Nightmares and mental illness. Implied CSA from the past on the readers part. Also hints that Jin watched his mom commit suicide. Touchy feely. Jin might be OOC idk, let me live my fantasy. Hurt Comfort kind of thing. OMG they're sharing a bed, so scandalous!!! Uhmmm, idk what else. Enjoy I'm sleep deprived homie (and desperately want Jin). ||EDIT: Hello humans I'm finally rewriting this because I am not letting a bunch of people read this and like it when it's horrible||
Fog.
Everything was fogged. A black endless pool of nothing and the smallest bit of fog stretching on forever. Despite the seemingly harmless scene, my anxiety spiked. My heart pumped hard making my ears ring as I looked around frantically.
No. Please no—
That familiar feeling crept up my throat, suffocating acidic sensation of panic. Head to toe my body burned, not like a fire, but like the closest of ice. Everything felt wrong. I knew why. Of course I did, I knew this scene very well infact. Which is why I was begging the inky darkness to spare me, to let me dream of something I knew I couldn't have tonight.
The warmth of tears slid down my cheek and I turned on my heel and ran, ran as if something was coming to kill me right in that moment, like a scary monster was hidden in the darkness.
There was a monster hidden.
And it was going to catch me no matter how far I ran, how much I begged, no matter what it would catch me. It couldn't be stopped.
The faster I ran the more I could see.
The house.
Oh God, the house. Not this place, not tonight please.
Within a matter of second I hear that laugh.
That fucking laugh.
Clear. Closer.
Not again.
Closer. Clearer.
Please.
I busted the front door open and ran to the bedroom, knowing that I wouldn't be safe. I never will be, but I try anyways. I froze in the room, not sure where to hide.
That pause costed me everything.
Those fucking hands, touching my skin.
It felt like how a vile rotting corpse smelled.
This has to be what death felt like. Nothing else can explain this suffering.
The sobs shook my body as I knew I couldn't do anything, nothing, fucking nothing.
I was that small child again, my childhood pajamas, the color I use to love that I now hate burned my eyes. No, the tears are what burned. Invisible scars were left as the tears slipped down my childhood face.
That voice pierced my ears, clawing my brain the way a bear would when threatened.
I wanted to scream, yell for my guardian— for anyone really.
I was turned around and I shut my eyes. I refused to remember that face.
I don't want to, please.
Every touch felt like a part of my soul was stolen, all of it was robbing me.
The bed, the one I use to feel safe in now turned into my biggest fear, was now touching my back.
If I could scream, or fight, or anything.
No.
No.
NO.
NONO
NONONO
NONONONO—
"NO!!"
I felt arms wrap around my cold sweaty body, I started to struggle against them until I heard his voice. It was thick, sleepy, and scared. Jin.
"I'm here."
The arms squeezed me closer and I felt the trembles. I sucked in a shaky breath, trying to not cry as I whispered back, "I'm here."
I cringed ever so slightly at the rawness of my voice, his face was buried into my back. If I was a fool I would have never noticed the small trembles in his arms as he held me. I shut my eyes as I took one last deep breath. Looks like we both had a nightmare this time.
I gently turned around and held him close to my chest. Frosthiem was always too cold to have crickets, but the wind replaced that sound at night. I had gotten Jin a wind chime not too long after meeting him, we had a small struggle putting it up in the window, it was gently playing it's song now. I shut my eyes and buried my head into his hair, that cold fresh smell of his shampoo grounding me further.
"Was it...about her?" I muttered softly against his head, my fingers gently scratching his scalp.
He nodded gently before his thick scratchy voice spoke, "I woke up before you. Same one tonight?"
I nodded against his head. His strong arms squeezed me tightly before he rolled over onto his back, eyes closed and arm over his face. I shifted to lay on his bare chest, his heartbeat slowed the longer we laid there. His hand traced small circles across my back and arm in a soft gentle motion, betraying how he acted any other time.
I knew he only acted like he was so high above me and he only wanted me around as a servant, he couldn't bring himself to love me fully without some sort of barrier. But moments like these, only the two of us would know, we let the acts fall and just... Were.
Nothing special. Nothing dramatic. No expectations. Just us. Real us. Nothing more nothing less.
The softest, almost timid sounding words fell from his lips, "I love you..."
My heart throbbed and my anxiety left fully as I mumbled against his chest, "I love you."
He gently used his finger to tilt my head up, his eyes raw and puffy, the softest and most beautiful facial expression on display for me. Only me.
His eyes said a million words he couldn't say verbally, promises he knew he couldn't keep, and pleas only I could understand.
My fingers grazed his cheek, his eyes fluttering closed at the action. I leaned in and pressed my lips against his softly and he returned the favor.
Lilith's bright and beautiful voice traveled across the small clearing, reaching Lucifer's ears as he dropped to the ground. He grinned as she ran to hug him, her arms careful to not knock into his wings. Adam was not far behind her, smiling brightly. The moment Adam collided with the other two they all toppled over, falling into the soft grass in a fit of giggles.
"Welcome back Ducky," Adam flashed Lucifer a smile as he rolled off to the side, pulling Lilith with him.
They all sat up and started bouncing from one topic to the next. The sky still bright with daylight, the grounds filled with the little sounds of animals running around, and the air warm and embracing. The world was bright, playful, and beautiful. But to Lucifer, the most beautiful things were the two humans in front of him; Adam braiding Lilith's long blonde hair while she spurred on and on about the new animals and how much she adored them.
For hours these three would talk, play, and explore. Lucifer taking the role of explaining how everything worked, taking great pride and joy when talking of the things he created for them. The two humans listening with glee on their faces, looking at him with such awe and adoration. Their faces encouraged and inspired him to make things, create the best things for them. It's why there were so many intriguing animals on earth. Lucifer spent all his days creating for and playing with the two humans. Adam and Lilith. Strong, Beautiful, pure.
Too soon the sky changed, turning darker. Calmer. Fireflies, one of Lucifers creations he made after Adam said the dark was scary to him, flew from where they hid at day to play. A few flooded threw the air directly towards Adam, gently landing on his hair. He held his hand out to let them rest in his hands, his eyes were a melted pot of fondness. Lilith followed suit next to him, taking great joy in the little creatures.
Lucifer watched the adorable display in front of him, his heart beating like crazy. They were so innocent, so cute, so precious. Usually Lucifer would leave the two humans be to sleep but tonight... He had something to show them.
"You do?" Both said at the same time. Lilith sounded excited while Adam was confused.
"I do! It's beautiful, I really think you'll like it! C'mon!" Lucifer spring up, flying for a brief moment as he pulled them up from their sitting position making Lilith laugh at his enthusiasm.
He held their hands as he led them into the trees, Adam and Lilith held each other's hands; they made a small triangle, a representation of their bond. The sky still slipping into the starry night as they all danced among the trees, tripping over each other, giggling, and playing still. Soon Lucifer ran up ahead of them, the two humans hearing something loud almost like water.
When Lucifer pulled back the willow trees leaves back they were met with a breathtaking scene. Rushing water cascading down among rocks into a body of water, the body of water holding all sorts of gorgeous plants and animals and fireflies lit up the beautiful place. Lilith held her hand over her mouth as she was compelled to cry from how gorgeous it was while Adam stared in awe.
"What's it called?" Adam asked breathlessly.
Lucifer held his hand out to him, pulling him into the water, "Waterfall."
"That's beautiful," Lilith whispered, following Adam into the water.
The two humans held Lucifers and as they walked closer to the waterfall, fish swam around them as their toes felt the small soft moss like plant under the water. The three met the waterfall, it was powerful but gentle. Lucifer encouraged the two to put their hands under the water, both hesitate for a second before doing so. Their eyes lit up and sparkled.
A sudden spark of mischief hit Lucifer and he grinned. He tugged the two under the waterfall, they squealed and giggled as they pull Lucifer and themselves back out from under it, accidentally causing them all to fall back into the water. Adam laughed with his whole body while Lilith tried to suppress her giggle. Lucifer looked like a wet bird to them and they found it amusing. Lucifer slowly started to laugh with them.
Hurt/Comfort. Mentions of Depression. Mentions of poor mental health. Sappy love. Bittersweet feeling.
The door creaked as I pushed the cracked door open enough to poke my head through. My voice was gentle and soothing as I broke the unbearable silence of the candlelit room, "My love...It's been awhile since you've locked yourself away like this.... Are you ok?"
My husband was sat on the bench of his desk, slumped over with the body language of a man who didn't really want to be alive anymore. His hair was devilish, matching the chaotic mess of his little duck creations that filled the room. There were portraits of Charlie, his first wife Lilith, and myself hung up around the room. I recall the time he first showed me this room and told me the portraits were like stars of hope in the dark sky. Yet, here he still was. Isolating himself and clearly unwell.
He took a deep breath and looked back at me for a second with a sad smile that didn't reach his eyes, "Oh honey— I'm fine, I'm great actually! Made a couple more ducks today."
He went to say something else but his voice was cut off and he quickly turned away, his head falling into his rambling hands. I didn't have to see his face to know he was trying not to cry. My heart pulled down into a heavy pit of sorrow knowing he wasn't okay. I quickly entered the room, my footsteps quiet and gentle, and sat next to him on the bench. Our shoulders touching but both of was facing opposite ways.
"Lucifer..." I whispered softly with a soft yet sad smile on my face, trying to get him to meet my eyes— only for him to evade my attempts. I sighed, bringing my hand to rest on his left hand that was in his lap, gently rubbing the gold band around his finger that matched mine. "I'm here."
His hand shook under mine and he took a shaky breath. He whispered, "I'm okay. Just... Having a bad day, y'know?"
Once he said that his shoulder shook a bit and he held my hand back, gripping it like I was the only thing keeping him alive. I stared at him, his gorgeous face twisted into a painful, hurt filled look. He was trying so hard to not cry in front of me, like he always did, almost as if he was ashamed to cry. I frown slightly as I gently rested my head on his shoulder, using my free hand to play with his sleeve.
We stayed like this for awhile. I mumbled softly as I pressed a kiss onto his shoulder, "I know... I'm here anyway. For better or for worse."
He let out a strangled sob before turning to grab me into his arms. He held me tight as he cried. He didn't wail or scream, no. His body shook as he tried to hold back his sobs. I gently rubbed his back and kept pressing kisses all over his head, whispering "I'm here" Over and over again.
I made a vow the day I married him that I would do anything and everything to make him happy, even if it was only temporary. I vowed to hold him even when he was like this. I vowed to love him. If him being happy meant crying in my chest, so be it. If him being happy meant the possibility of his ex wife to catch his heart again, so be it. No matter what it is, I'll make it happen for him to be happy. Anything to make him feel less like this.
Eventually he took a shaky inhale, letting it out slowly before looking up at me finally. Even now, his tear stained cheeks and puffy eyes, he was beautiful. He placed a hand on my cheek, his lips wobbling as I leaned into his touch, kissing his palm. He leaned in and rested his forehead against mine and whispered, "I... I love you."
I kissed him gently on the lips, holding his hand that was on my cheek. I leaned back to see him. All of him. In every way he was perfect. Everything, was what I loved. I smiled and tilted my head as I whispered back,
