The Starship Avoidance

I'm just an annoying fankid with too many interests on their hands and not enough hours in the day or a high enough post limit to deal with all of them. If you wanna win MacPoints send me Writing Prompts! My name is Mac and we use They/Them pronouns here. That's not a request, it's a demand. Respect my pronouns or LEAVE.

[existennialmemes]

Every Website right now: Give us a scan of your driver's license or be banished. It's for safety.

Every Website for the last 10 years: Oopsies we had another massive data breach! Tee-hee!

[mlarayoukai-archive]

having your own money is fucking dangerous because the only person stopping me from buying whatever I want is myself. and myself has bad judgment sometimes

[coffee-without-anesthetics]

forgive me father for i have opened a notification and read the message within to make the red dot go away and then forgot to reply for a month . it will happen again

[bemusedlybespectacled]

Do you have an Assigned Animal™ (including extinct or mythical ones) that dominates the gifts people give you/your decor/etc.?

Yes, I have an Assigned Animal™ (owls, koalas, unicorns, dinosaurs, etc.)

No, but I've been assigned something else (fandom, color, plant, etc.).

I have more than one Thing (ex: koalas AND purple AND cacti)

BB what the fuck are you talking about

Voting ended onApr 26

[minusboy]

become a premium member (my friend) today to unlock extra content (every thought i’ve ever had)

[prokopetz]

So it turns out that fated rivals are a thing, but due to a bureaucratic error it was never specified that nemesis pairs have to be the same species; consequently, for most living humans, their fated rival is some kind of bug.

[coughloop]

hey  mom wjat

[coughloop]

[specialagentartemis]

why does it take SO much energy to keep your house only sort of clean

[charlesoberonn]

Middle-aged magical girl.

She's been defending the Earth since the early 90s and she's very tired.

[charlesoberonn]

My name is Tominaga Haruka. I was chosen by a magical talking animal, and for the last 29 years I've been Earth's one and only... Wonder-Sparkle Princess.

[gropeable-boychest]

she's been fighting the same villains for three decades and they are also tired of it. Most of them aren't giving it their all. Half of them are in a groupchat they've added her to where they schedule their evil plans to make sure they don't interfere with each other, or more importantly, with *her* Xalkrax the space demon from outer space decided to attack the city when she was taking her vacation time once, and now he's dead, because even the power of friendship and redemption can't save you if you interrupt her rare vacations

[charlesoberonn]

Demon Queen Eluria: Gonna fill the city people's hearts with hatred on thursday to cause mayhem and discord.

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: Can't, got a PTA meeting.

Demon Queen Eluria: Friday?

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: A birthday party.

Demon Queen Eluria: Damn. How about I fill just the mayor's heart with hatred then?

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: That'd be redundant, lol. Maybe fill his heart with a desire to fix the fucking potholes?!

Demon Queen Eluria: LMFAO love you, bitch. Stay strong.

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: You too, gurl. How's the husband? Still dead?

Demon Queen Eluria: Yep. Thanks for that, btw.

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: Don't mess with my time off :p

[charlesoberonn]

Why are people tagging this '#wonder sparkle princess' like that's a thing and not a name I made up exclusively for this post?

[ardinwriter]

Congratulations on inventing a new tumblr deity!!

[charlesoberonn]

She isn't 29 years old. She's been a magical girl for 29 years. If she started at 14 (typical magical girl protagonist age) then she'd be 43.

[teaboot]

”Why are you wearing an apron? Are you baking?” No I need the apron to activate Productive Housework Mode. Other accessories include Paisley Bandanna (+2 stamina) Chanclas (+4 defense) and Yellow Rubber Gloves (+2 initiative, +5 defense)

When I assemble the full set I go through a Super Sayan transformation and get to roll advantage on a primary action of my choosing

[teaboot]

like this

[ygosideblog]

who keeps giving her these things

[frommetrunui]

[super-saiyan-rose]

she ends up condemned too D:

[princesspornstar-deactivated201]

damn bitch get it together

[estrogenpatchnotes]

[megadethzenbu-deactivated202011]

She’s a Darklord now too

[ashestoashesjc]

[spdy4]

This what my phone translates the last card to

[ygosideblog]

hey guys guess what

her old friends joined her

[smooththegoofyshark]

Good for them fuck shit up ladies

[boobiemom]

I wanna add those two girls’ names as cards, and they’re pretty great names. 

Also they are 100% drawn to be placed at Condemned Darklord’s sides. 

This is what peak polyamory looks like.

[thetetrarchyofcassidy]

Any girls wanna get corrupted together and then have hot gay sex maybe?

[ygoheritageposts]

Yu-Gi-Oh! Heritage Post

[jeanritchie]

its so awesome that you can straight up write fanfiction in your head to help yourself fall asleep and it doesnt even have to be good or something anyone would ever want to read. even yourself

[sacred-portal]

[rat2rrj]

Stance

[uncertainlys]

it will pass but like can i at least get an eta

[otterpuppss]

pickles endless hunger and greed

[zoomed-in-rats]

Let's get a zoom on the bottomless pit.

[civresearcher]

You can do it Pickles.

Every piece of cake is a personal piece of cake if you just try hard and believe in yourself.

[xamenh-sto-oneiro]

Let me seduce u with my knowledge on useless things

[bogleech]

junk food is always better than no food

I’ve met people who will actually argue against this (and I suggest just blocking anyone who does) but if your choice is between going hungry and getting fast food or snack food….PLEASE JUST FEED YOURSELF. No food is actually bad enough that it’s better to skip eating entirely. Malnutrition is more dangerous, more immediately, and more long-term than any consequences of eating a damn twinkie or a cheeseburger.