terminal bleeding heart

Iris, she/her, 28, lesbian. Trans women loved and welcomed here (but only if you like shitty memes and assorted beasts)

[orangekittyenergy]

Leticia "Lettie" Garcia - The Healer 🌹

Alt below

[nbarpf]

One of my all-time favorites

[ozempicofficial]

[nalivaa]

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

[lelouch]

they couldn't put him in the beer campaign so he was represented by a bunch of berries

[galaxycepheus]

[ID. A beer advertisement with a row of cans, each with the face of a player from Mexico's men's football team, except for the aforementioned morita. There is a small pile of berries beside the last of the beer cans, which has been highlighted with a red circle. End ID.]

[boybeetles]

Don’t like how doctors always say “good news, test came back negative.” Like no bad news. There is something haunting me and we don’t know what it is.

[evilsanlang]

it's okay if you as a lesbian want to fuck the straight blonde popstar but you can't be pretending she's a lesbian too girl at least make it a lesbian corruption kink or some shit

[evilsanlang]

"taylor swift is a lesbian" check your house for mold

"I can fuck the heterosexuality out of sabrina carpenter" questionable taste, but much more respectable

[twentybrokenipodclassics]

[nicodisonbeamattack]

The first thing Homura Akemi did when her crush died in front of her was to sell her soul, followed immediately by googling how to build a bomb. Nobody does it like her

[punkitt-is-here]

this duck LOVES pink drink

[punkryuki]

[writingdose]

writers, instead of asking ai for help, you can always use your childhood trauma and repressed issues to help you with that fic

[capacity2]

a question for you

Lay it on me mister fuckinyouhard0989

[capacity2]

He’s so shy he died

[capacity2]

We could’ve had something beautiful together but everbody leaves me

[innerchildabortionclinic]

careers under capitalism

helping elderly people: one dollar

Senior Torture Manager: $1,500,000,000/yr plus benefits

[dufrau]

i dont think straight people should be allowed to do "enemies to lovers" i think if a man is your enemy you need to trust that you were correct the first time and slay him in battle

[cyborg-furby]

Welcome to my escape room. *places an affectionate cat on your lap*

[girlgrimer]

How are my sweetie pees

[girlgrimer]

I Said How The Fuck Are My Fucking Sweetie Pees

[hppjmxrgosg]

"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.

the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.

this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.

therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:

- being a cow

- being an almond

- being a woman

- being a coconut

- being in the omegaverse

- being an oat

(list is exemplary and not finite)

in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.

[miraclemaya]

religious pervert: i came in my panties because of god

atheist pervert: material conditions caused me to cum in my panties

agnostic pervert: no one knows why i keep on cumming in my panties

[wosp-reactivated]

Christian babies have so far not found a purpose or use outside of baseball