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@occult-cupcakes
If you ever see that I reblogged and then like, deleted a personal post of yours or someone else’s, it’s because it was more than likely an accident and my brain fully turned off and gave the controls to thing that says “sure, I’ll reblog that” to nearly anything innocuous.
My favorite firework video on the internet is this one, where 45 minutes worth of fireworks are accidentally detonated all at once on July 4th 2012 in San Diego. The sound is magnificent. It's the end of days. Infinitely better than the show they planned.
the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.
they couldn't put him in the beer campaign so he was represented by a bunch of berries
[ID. A beer advertisement with a row of cans, each with the face of a player from Mexico's men's football team, except for the aforementioned morita. There is a small pile of berries beside the last of the beer cans, which has been highlighted with a red circle. End ID.]
Transmasc Mx. Krabs w/ Big Naturals getting ready for their shift at the Krusty Kunt
Fun fact: due to the ongoing financial support from the people of tumblr, critically endangered pygmy raccoons being rehabbed in Cozumel are now able to get vaccines for deadly diseases like distemper and rabies before they are released.
The funniest and most enduring legacy of dashcon.
To contribute to the critically endangered pygmy raccoon fund, you can donate:
On the website
On Venmo
On PayPal (make a note that this is a donation for pygmy raccoon conservation)
The things Democrats would have to do to win young men back would chase away the female vote.
(This is the dipshit who's trying to primary Nancy Pelosi btw).
Democrats are not an anti-man party, but Republicans are an anti-woman party, which is why men flock to them.
Just like Democrats are not an anti-white party, but Republicans are an anti-Black party, which is why white supremacists flock to them.
For Democrats to get the young male vote or the white working class vote would require them to become more like the Republican Party. And we don't want that.
Hey, doing a wellness check, how has leftists trying to reach out to white men turned out?
Vibe check on Maine?
If the only thing that has kept you going was outliving Mitch McConnell, imma need yall to pick a new person to outlive and fast. Your mission is not over.
Man I miss free the nipple. Its getting warmer and we don’t even have free the nipple anymore
feminism has backslid so hard in recent years people don't even know what free the nipple means anymore
To clarify for those who don't know, "free the nipple" isn't about going braless, it's about going topless
No shirt, no bra, completely bare torso, just like cis men are allowed to
It's about desexualizing breasts and "female presenting nipples" and not being criminalized for our bodies if we want to go topless because it's a million damn degrees out. This was a popular growing movement that was still widely known a decade ago!
And the fact that not wearing a bra is so discouraged and stigmatized that people think the movement was about being able to go braless under your shirt in public rather than about being able to not wear a shirt at all says a lot about how far we've backslid in the past decade
Martina McBride didn't win Country Music Association Song of the Year for a song about how burning your house down with your abusive husband still inside it is good, noble, and an allegory for the American Revolution for people to act like the genre belongs to bootlicking fucks
other things people didn't do for you to act like country music belongs to bootlicking fucks:
Garth Brooks winning video of the year at the ACMs for a song about how none of us are free as long as there's racism and homophobia
Reba McEntire charting with a gothic horror song about an innocent man being executed by an incompetent judge and a corrupt sheriff
Willie Nelson being, well, his entire self tbh
Dolly Parton recording the hating capitalism banger of all time
Kacey Musgraves telling everyone to ignore the haters, smoke weed, and be a bisexual slut
how the hell did I leave Morgan Wade off this list. wrote a song about being depressed, alcoholic, and suicidal and how mental illness stigma sucks, saw how much people connected with it, wrote a Part II of that song about how she's doing better now but you're never totally free of the risk of relapse. fucking icon.
I specifically curated this list so people couldn't be like "ah yes but you see here is my simple binary of good and bad country music which always works", I made sure to add different genders, eras, subgenres, etc and y'all are still pulling that shit in the tags!
listen. Alan Jackson, the archetypal mister big hat man sitting on a tractor singing about a pickup truck, wrote a shockingly normal song about 9/11 that was like "yeah I don't know jack shit about politics but my copy of the bible says we're supposed to love everyone" and then went on the radio and explained how he specifically wanted to write a song about that day that "wasn't vengeful". Miranda Lambert took the southern leftist slogan "y'all means all" and made it the title of a corny ass pop-country song for the Queer Eye soundtrack. Kenny Chesney stole a horse from a cop and Tim McGraw put the cop in a chokehold defending him, and I know that's not about their music but it is, and this is very important, fucking sick as hell
it's fine if you only listen to female country artists or pre-1990 country artists or whatever the fuck you want but stop acting like you've cracked the secret code to dividing a whole genre of art into good pure anti-establishment folk songs vs bad corrupted right-wing sellout pulp
updating this post for 2025:
Luke Combs covering Fast Car and keeping the line "I work in the market as a checkout girl" and doing an interview about how he couldn't change a single word because it's not his story. king shit
Morgan Wallen doing I Had Some Help, literally the first song that spoke to me as a male survivor of domestic abuse. also shoutout to the guy for getting caught saying a racial slur and responding by specifically telling his fans not to defend him and raising a bunch of money for the Black Music Action Coalition. bro had an engraved invitation to the culture war and said "nah I'd rather be normal"
Shaboozey just absolutely obliterating the drunk roadhouse anthem glass ceiling
Maren Morris and Brothers Osborne with a song that okay, released in 2019 but I didn't hear until recently, about how good friends mind their own business and let you love whoever you want and also get high with you when you're broke
Kimberley Perry! If I Die Young Part 2!! "actually I'm glad I lived, bitch" ass song that I bet is gonna mean a LOT to kids fighting depression
Kelsea Ballerini and Noah Kahan with Cowboys Cry Too. okay it's shallow and corny but genuinely a shallow and corny song about how men shouldn't be afraid to have feelings is what a lot of men need
bringing the full version of this post back around because people are pissing me off today
*defensively* not all of us were taught the wheels on the bus go round and round in school
give me your most controversial music opinion
the beatles were one ugly guy moving really fast
such is the extraordinary power of the elf stones
seeing trump gloat that he got a red card for team usa overturned and then watching the us get utterly trounced by belgium has brought so much warmth to my dead, non-soccer following heart
starting a foundation that gives disadvantaged children one wild ass night at the club
Why the fuck are you suggesting putting CHILDREN in a club?
So they can sip grey goose, maybe have a cig, and feel the rhythm? Are you the fun police?
the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.
they couldn't put him in the beer campaign so he was represented by a bunch of berries
Farm cat presiding over the baby alpacas.
