Random Fandom Nerd

[fangorn-forest]

not enough secret gardens and hidden passageways and bookshelves that open to a mysterious library these days. get working on that girls.

[paperjoshi]

on it boss

[paperjoshi]

trapped in the catacombs boss

[yuriwinged]

the prince has begun practicing curtseying in the mirror. which could mean nothing.

[heydocverdant]

we have good news and bad news, my liege. the good news is that we now know what that curtsying was about: you will be pleased to know that, after several heartfelt conversations between your child, the court jesters and a myriad of singing woodland creatures, you are now the parent of a proud and joyful new princess. the bad news is that, due to a series of events related to the dragon-sized hole in her bedchamber wall,

[slitherpunk]

lost in a dungeon? eat a rescueberry

[sparrrorow-art]

the shimp got too much attention and now there are transphobes in my notes, this is a transgender blog run by a transgender dyke. fuckers.

[fleshengine]

Reblog this loby when they least expect it.

[eggcup-deactivated20180129]

that thing about how removing the middle 2 panels of a cad comic makes it funnier is true 

[zonecassette]

holy shit

[severalowls]

I can’t even imagine what meaningless filler went into panels 2-3.

[newtypenea]

oh my god these are actually funny

[baishujinkou]

[moonkitty]

this is 100% true and once you remove the horrible filler bullshit its comedy gold

[bgm05]

[bgm05]

Quite tickled by the idea of having a massive green gorilla couch that you only sit on when smoking weed and the weed leaves a miasmic stain on the gorilla couch

[shittysawtraps]

remember to leave out milk and rusty blades for jigsaw tonight

[shittysawtraps]

SANTA I’M SO FUCKING SORRY

[thegreatyin]

"how can m/f ships be good-" first of all through the power of bisexuality anything is possible so write that down. second of all if we start othering ships based on gender and nothing else we're no better than the opposition. third of all you need to watch more addams family

[lumsel]

it's very funny that you can have penis in your g-rated game but only if its a culturally significant penis. another penis would bump the rating up but this one is special. it doesnt count.

[emfrots]

[wordfather]

goodbye 2023👋hello 𓏏𓉔𓇋𓋴 𓇌𓅂𓄿𓂋 𓇋 𓅃𓇋𓃭𓃭 𓎼𓅂𓏏 𓄿 𓅓𓅲𓅓𓅓𓇌 𓃀𓅱𓇌𓆑𓂋𓇋𓅂𓈖𓂧 𓅓𓄿𓇌𓃀𓅂 𓉔𓅲𓋴𓃀𓄿𓈖𓂧 𓇋𓆑 𓉔𓅂𓂕𓋴 𓎢𓅱𓅱𓃭 𓅃𓇋𓏏𓉔 𓏏𓉔𓄿𓏏

[brightgreendandelions]

my egyptologist friend says this is a (very poorly) phonetically transcribed english phrase "this year i will get a mommy boyfriend"

[wordfather]

okay you werent supposed to know that

[beemovieerotica]

at the vet because apparently tylenol decided to eat a joint

she's going to be ok she's just high as fuck

[beemovieerotica]

[teetytotty]

I would live in a house if this was the house and this was the tv

[what-even-is-thiss]

Maybe I should make a fictional monarchy that always passes its secession to an opposite gendered child. Just to create new forms of court drama you understand.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Like the crown passes from father to daughter to son to daughter to son and so on.

Is there any irl society that would do this? No. Would it add an extra layer to who’s trying to kill which sibling and why? Yes.

[what-even-is-thiss]

What happens if there’s a nonbinary, intersex, or otherwise weirdly gendered child, you ask? Easy. Even more court drama.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I like the enthusiasm guys but I’ll remind you that people fake transing their gender for any reason at all is extraordinarily rare. People don’t usually like giving themselves dysphoria even if it’s to gain power. People pretending to be trans to be in line for the throne just wouldn’t happen.

Now what could happen that’s far more realistic is someone accusing a transgender child of pretending to be trans to make a power grab or a transgender child trying to make the legal argument that they’re still technically male/female so they should be in the running actually.

[what-even-is-thiss]

What if the king doesn’t have any girl children you ask? Then the court drama extends to his sisters and girl cousins obviously.

[fangirlmenace]

I'm begging you to write a book

[what-even-is-thiss]

You’ll never believe what I’m doing in my spare time right now

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason that Americans are so obsessed with kosher/flaky salt is that it’s much easier to grab large handfuls of it to throw at demons and giant slugs and the occasional giant demon slug.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Once you’re used to your particular brand of kosher salt it’s also easier to intuitively estimate how much you need to grab to destroy this particular type of demon slug.

[i-dont-think-thats-true]

I don’t think that’s true

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

give me a nice thought

[cletusthurstonbeauregard]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

bitch I’ll live to WRITE it

[what-even-is-thiss]

I think a lot of writers might benefit from giving themselves permission to get weird with format.

Use second person, drop classic rising action and climax format, write backwards, just sit in a moment, tell all you want and refuse to show, make an entire book that’s just one run on sentence, reject tropes, use all tropes, cliche yourself to death, produce something that’s completely gibberish. Break all the rules of marketability. Become ungovernable.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Write a story that just takes place inside one pathetic little person’s head. Do it. It’s enrichment in your enclosure.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Do the writer’s equivalent of playing with finger paints. Do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it

[what-even-is-thiss]

It’s the middle of the night and I should be sleeping but listen. Listen. Just get weird with it. Open your soul up a little bit. Like actually don’t worry about it being palatable. I’m serious. Get weirder. Get weirder right now. I’m demanding that you get weirder right now. It’s not your responsibility to make your reader feel good. It’s your job to make art, goddamnit. Make art. Make weird art. Open up your third eye and eat an entire cheesecake.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Was anyone else forced to memorize the preamble to the constitution in middle school and recite it for a grade or was my US history teacher just weird

[what-even-is-thiss]

That same history teacher made us get into groups of four and physically tied our hands together until we pretended to fully negotiate the compromise of 1850 so maybe she was just weird

[gandalf-the-bean]

the teacher. did what

[what-even-is-thiss]

I was forced to negotiate the South’s position in that particular activity which was actually the most uncomfortable part. Not all of our hands being tied together in the middle.

We weren’t just tied together either. She had us lean forward get elbows on the table right hands firmly clasped together all up in each others faces. I also distinctly remember that my pen had broken that day and as a result I had blue ink all over my hand and arm while I was directly in the faces of these other kids holding their hands and negotiating the side of slave states. I did not enjoy any part of that activity. I don’t think anyone did.

[gandalf-the-bean]

what the fuck…?

[what-even-is-thiss]

Well you know middle school is already so weird this might as well happen