My little decoy

No one ever died for my sins in hell as far as I can tell, at least the ones I got away with

[requiem-4-a-drink-deactivated20]

hope your pets stay healthy in 2017

[rotg-fan-page]

I almost didn’t blog this and felt guilty

[ckascade-deactivated20170413]

Not risking it

[unorthodox-views]

hope ya pets even healthier in 2018

[zackisontumblr]

hope your pets discover immortality in 2019

[mashtonbating]

Made in the A.M. + Music videos

[softpeachlarry-blog]

[mashtonbating]

They told me that the end is near

[bummass]

Dove chocolate and Dove soap are two different companies who havent sued each other because they have different trademarks lol

[gaycism]

Damn and I really all this time just thought dove (the soap people) had a meeting one day and were just like “…. we might fuck around and make some chocolate”

[fatfreefiddlefaddle-deactivated]

^literally what I thought

[mashtonbating]

Because I want it all

[chillwerewolf]

small child: [absolutely incomprehensible gibberish]

me:

[hungry-hobbits]

small child: [absolutely incomprehensible gibberish]

me:

[dragon-in-a-fez]

psa to fellow college instructors: it costs exactly $0 to be understanding when students are stressed as fuck at midterm time instead of saying “lol they knew it was coming tho”

[dragon-in-a-fez]

I lied, this actually cost me $31 today because I bought a fuckton of coffee for all my students but you should’ve seen their faces it was like I’d given them the holy grail, the fountain of youth, and the second season of firefly all in one

[purpletangyvaginas]

[grandpaq]

If I reblog it does that mean I’m gonna have good dick to give out this summer? 🤔

[lickmetilllicecreammmm]

Just here for the money part lmao

[kingstcvc]

when life treats you like shit but you still gotta keep staying positive

[weavemama]

CHRISSY OMFG

[coolsaddad-blog]

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

[feels-for-the-fictional]

I have been waiting for this post all my life.

[citrusgeoff]

I saw somebody did this for ATL, so I thought I would do one for Waterparks

I’d like to know how many Waterparks fans there are on tumblr, and the only way to do that is for everyone to reblog this. You can only reblog it ONCE. Not twice. Once. So. Let’s do that.

[forsciencejohn]

the year is 2025

scientists are still scrambling to figure out what “zigazig ahh” is so that they can give the spice girls what they really really want

the spice girls are getting impatient

war is upon us

[lilithdevile]

ATTENTION PET OWNERS

This post is going to rushed but I’m still shaking and it’s hard to type but I NEED people to know this

My mom just took my dog to the vet She(my dog) was(still is?) having a seizure

Last month we took my dog to the vet and they told us she had developed diabetes, they told us it was caused by the food she was eating, purina beneful. They told us that there have been many many many reports of Beneful has been causing diabetes, seizures, and even death in dogs.

We had no idea

We immediately switched her food and put her on a special diet plan for her diabetes, unfortunately the effects were already permeate.

Today at 11:20 my mom woke me up crying, I helped her carry my dog to the car (while she was still having a seizure) and watched her drive away red faced and still crying.

Please please PLEASE if you are feeding your pets Purina beneful PLEASE switch their food ASAP Beneful is poising dogs and I don’t want anyone else to experience what I just did Also if you could please help me signal boost this so everyone can know

[toxic-w0nder-deactivated2016020]

This would explain why my dog has seizures now…fucking hell

[the666assbutt]

Reblog and save lives of dogs

[skeletonboyfriend-remade]

found out purina was the reason my dog winston had been having seizures and puking. please don’t feed your dog purina.

[st-rks-deactivated20160918]

reblog even if you don’t own a dog or even if you’re not “a dog person” because I can’t even imagine how horribly depressed I would be if this happened to my dog

[simplydee27]

My dog had kidney failure cause of purina😔

[vivianstorm]

Two of my families dogs died when they switched to purina…

[smiling-calum]

A Michael Phelps PSA

[brianttran-deactivated20120224]

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

[ovod0se]

I love my mom.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

sorry followers :(

[whatgracelikes-deactivated20190]

omg im so glad to se so many people love their mummy

[ameriagrae]

Why’re you being mean to my mum?

[larryismyhallelujah-blog]

goddamn it

[lollie-pond-deactivated20150728]

Nope. Googled it. 15 minuets. Nope. Not taking any chances

[steampoweredplayer]

Koop

[twirliest]

This has 1.2 million reblogs … Ps not riskin it

[nathanvj]

1.4 almost ps not risking it

[queenprotein-deactivated2016012]

Fuck this post

[i-likethesummer-rain]

2.5 million notes I hate myself

[froot-lupul]

I reblogged this twice now

[insidethe99-blog]

I’m so sorry this isn’t b99 related and this isn’t real but I can’t not skip this I’m sorry

[mayannaise-hart-deactivated2021]

Not taking a fucking chance

[lethamber]

Sorry, guys, but Im not taking a chance

[celestialkeyprincess]

No chances… She’s out… And she must be protected.

[bitchwithwifivevo]

How dare you

[riarkling]

Whatcha doin to me Farkle!

[chillyclarke-deactivated2018010]

i can’t risk it

sorry babes my moms just my favorite person ever

[prettylittleliarsfan901-deactiv]

Sorry I can’t risk it

[missprincessdancingsunshine]

Fuck sorry guys  I love my mom

[incoherentlyblogging]

Omg I hate these things but I am paranoid. So sorry guys.

[feels-ships-lunars]

2.8 million notes

CANT RISK IT

[trapbvby]

Sorry guys

[desolves]

sorry 😩

[mexicanthighs-deactivated201605]

IM NOT RISKING IT

[gorillattacks-deactivated201703]

I did, my mom is STILL DEAD. Works.

[faggottt]

3.3 million notes GURLLLLLL