Se Maravillosa

"La vida es una maravilla, entonces ¿porque no ser una?"

[whosname]

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

[graffitinight]

When you try to talk about enshittification, it sounds like conspiracy theories. (I'm not crazy)

Amazon made their service worse, to force people to pay for Prime.

Nowadays, if you order from Amazon, there is a week long delay before your package is shipped. (on purpose)

I remember when orders would ship out the same day. (I remember - it was real)

YouTube didn't used to have ads. Now, ads play in the middle of videos. (it's worse than TV ever was)

The best can opener I have owned is over 40 years old. Modern ones just don't hold up as well. (The ones I bought new broke ages ago)

The bread machine my mom got for her wedding lasted 30 years. It's been replaced twice in the last 5 years. (How can you fuck this up?)

The cardboard tubes in the middle of toilet paper rolls have gotten larger. (This too?) Companies increasing the price of the product while selling you less. (REALLY?)

It sounds crazy. (it's the truth) When you talk about it, YOU sound crazy. (it's true)

Even when people believe you (do they really), all they can say is "it sucks". (it's too big) Because the problem is so big, so pervasive, what can we even DO about it???

To get the necessary laws written and passed, we need politicians, to get the politicians elected we need information campaigns, to fund campaigns we need money, and all the money is being hoarded by the people profiting from enshittification. (it sounds so fake)

So I talk about enshittification (it sounds crazy), so people don't forget that things have been made worse on purpose (it's true), even though I sound crazy. (maybe I am)

[grimboigio]

It's called planned obsolescence and it was invented when lightbulbs could still run for 1000 years. Enshittification is the web-specific (and more specifically social media) version of that.

[foldingfittedsheets]

It is So Boring in the mattress store for kids. It’s basically hell for children because there’s fuckall to do for them.

A couple I was helping earlier had two little ones, three and six, who were behaving in a rather saintly fashion for the average bored kid I see. I tried to engage them with remotes and things while their parents talked.

Eventually they were restless enough that I pulled out notepads and asked if they wanted to draw. The three year old quickly lost interest and I went over to ask her favorite animal. She told me “elephant” so to delight and amaze her I started drawing an elephant. Usually kids are into it.

When I was done she pronounced, “It looks like a giraffe.”

I staggered back melodramatically but actually laughing hysterically and said, “There goes my art degree!”

The parents laughed and said kids were harsh critics. When they checked out they saw my elephant doodle on the desk and both did a double take like, “Woah, that’s a really good elephant!”

“Yeah, I actually did go to art school, but it’s okay. My niece wasn’t very impressed with my drawings at that age either.”

[foldingfittedsheets]

Behold, a giraffe.

[mdemaravilla]

So wholesome!! More people like OP pleasee. Some people are so mean with kids who accompany their parents on errands and it's like they are BORED, you would also start screaming if your legal guardian took you into the fifth store of the day with no snack in sight.

[thatdisasterauthor]

It's amazing I didn't end up with issues around beds given the two very bizarre experiences I had relating to beds as a child.

When I was four or five, my dad and uncles dug out the basement of the cabin to add more bedrooms, and they cut a hole for where the new stairs into the basement would go. Where was this hole? UNDER MY BED. Did I know about it? NO. Not until they randomly pulled my bed back one day to reveal a Pit Of Darkness (no lights or stairs had been installed yet) under where I'd been sleeping. And then I just. Kept sleeping there until my new room in the basement was finished.

Then, when I was six, my parents DRUGGED ME WITH COUGH SYRUP on Christmas Eve so they could get me out of my old bed in the middle of the night and build my new bunkbed. They then put me in the new bed ON THE TOP BUNK and waited for me to wake up Christmas morning. I did wake up. Eighteen inches from a ceiling that I had previously only seen from several feet away at the closest. I screamed, flailed, almost fell out of the bed, and managed to save myself by clinging to the outside of the railing until my brain reset enough to climb out of bed properly. I did not find out about the drugging portion of this until I was nearly thirty.

[thatdisasterauthor]

Me: haha, funny childhood stories!

Tumblr: ...babe, you good?

[thatdisasterauthor]

The floor hole in question.

[viejospellejos]

[thatdiabolicalfeminist]

I honestly think relationships in general would be healthier, in general, if we didn’t believe they should always, by default, last forever.

When the default is “forever” and shorter relationships are seen as a failure, we miss out on a lot. We stay in relationships that don’t work because they’re not “bad enough” to leave, as though not wanting the relationship anymore isn’t a good enough reason. We deny ourselves happy memories, saying “If it doesn’t work now, our love then wasn’t real.” We pass on relationships we know would be short, because if it doesn’t last forever, what’s the point in joy in the moment?

An ending isn’t a failure. It’s an ending. Most relationships have them. What would our relationships be like if we stopped focusing on our fear of endings and started focusing on what we - and our friends, partners, and families - need and want right now?

[skodasforge]

“It’s photoshopped” honestly in the age of AI that has a homey sort of nostalgia to it. Remember when people used to put effort into faking things?

[kaosuqi]

photoshop fakers are like the villain with moral standards now

[mysharona1987]

They semi-cancelled Timothee Chalamet for simply saying he found opera and ballet boring, by the way.

How does Hollywood work these days?

Being a bit of a naive, foolish young man and (wrongfully) calling opera and ballet irrelevant?

“You must apologise immediately! No Oscar for you.”

Acknowledging you stole terrified teenage girls from their bedrooms?

“Eh, you get a pass.”

[mysharona1987]

Kidnapping teenage girls seems kind of worse than being stupid and uncultured, in the grand scheme of things.

[mysharona1987]

”Well, Tim is dating a Kardashian sister.”

Embarrassing as it is, this other man admitted to war crimes.

[mysharona1987]

[mysharona1987]

But this is genuinely a shitty act against humanity.

[maalidoesart]

run

[elisecairo]

[katherynefromphilly]

As someone who was alive when Bob Ross (and William Alexander before him — that’s where the approach is from) was on PBS, I can 100% testify that you can paint along with him.

You may need to learn how to set up your paints and such… but this is what people did, live, while the show aired. That’s what the show was for. I had family members create lovely works of art they enjoyed, which I still have on my walls, because William Alexander and Bob Ross both said:

SCREW METICULOUS CLASSICAL ART PRACTICES — JUST GRAB A PALETTE KNIFE AND BIG OLD BRUSH AND PAINT!

They freed a whole generation of people who were taught to paint detail and realism and exact representation of reality — people who largely gave up this kind of thing because it got tedious.

I watched the joy of family members as they rediscovered art as a messy fun spontaneous half hour activity.

Give it a try.

[rudjedet]

*grabs tumblr by the face* hey, hey look at me. whatever you do, we are NOT pivoting to "well Hatshepsut COULD be trans because she never said she WASN’T" after we spent years undoing the whole thing where people shoehorn modern gender frameworks into the perception of ancient historical figures whose culture didn't have this framework. we are NOT going to use "don't put words in the ancients' mouths" as an excuse to say "it could still be true because she never said it was false". Hatshepsut - and before her several other female kings like Sobekneferu and Tawosret - only referred to herself with masculine pronouns when she grammatically had to, while she used feminine pronouns everywhere else she could, indicating that she likely didn’t consider herself as anything other than a woman per the ancient Egyptian constructs of such.

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

OP: How to create floating Chinese shufa/calligraphy (cr夏末）

[pseudomantis]

[is-the-owl-video-cute-deactivat]

a squirrel or perhaps a cardinal posted this

[phaeton-flier]

How about you mind your own damn business

[shhhhimwatchingthis]

BBC Merlin is insane as a show. Its an adaptation of Arthurian mythos. It's inspired by CW's Smallville (this is 100% real look it up). it stars 4 unknown 20 somethings and British acting legends. It's aimed at kids and families. its a tragedy. Its campy as hell. It will make you cry. It asks you, like Merlin, to believe in the Golden age of Camelot. It never shows you that Golden age. Everyone in the show is the most beautiful person you'll ever see. people will clown on the CGI. Its one of the most homerotic shows of the 2000's. Its an on purpose allegory for queerphobia, but those allegorious queer characters are largely villains. If you watched it when you were 12 you will never quite be able to let it go. This is a curse. This is an experience you wouldn't give up for the world.

[headspace-hotel]

I’ve been reading about werewolves on Wikipedia and I just have to say. “Werewolves are warriors that descend into hell to fight demons” kicks unbelievable amounts of ass as a concept

[gayrob0t]

'I asked chat GPT-'

oh did you? You asked something that steals shit to lie to you about a subject? And you just tell me this like I care to know what it said? Like I wanted to know its opinion? I regularly ask my cat Cheesey Gordita Crunch about many subjects and I think I trust his judgement more than whatever bullshit ur shitty algorithm spat out

[gayrob0t]

I asked catCGC about the issues and I think his input is valuable here he says 'weh'