Hopeless With Technology (Yet Here I Am For Some Reason)

March 13th, 30, bisexual aromantic non-binary, prefers they/them pronouns, High-Fuctioning Autistic, compulsive worry-wart and constantly putting my foot in my mouth, proud Minnesotan

[miki-13]

Phainon: The truth is... I was playing my flute for you the whole time. But I knew you had a thing with this guy, and he seems cool. (Mydei's eyes shine brighter) So, I was just gonna keep playing this flute song about my secret feelings until my flute broke.

Mydei: Deliverer... (he closes the distance and kisses Phainon)

Trailblazer: GASP

Mydei: (withdraws, holding Phainon's face) My flute spell was for you as well. You're an exceptional man with great hair, but exceptional men like us cannot fall in love. That is the secret of ordinary people.

Trailblazer: Uh, that's REAL dumb.

Phainon: I agree.

Trailblazer: Wait, you agree with me or him?

[sharrrrknight]

When the girlboss you've been lowkey crushing on turns out to be a convict and forces you to grapple with your past actions as a sort of judge/jailer figure

[goth-queen]

I made a battle axe out of monster cans

[ruinedchildhood]

Pretty fun weapon to draw

[sexybritishllama]

idk man sometimes i like it when video game writers are allowed to plan a series of events that happen in a specific order and affect each other in turn to become an overarching narrative, and i don’t mind trusting those writers to take me through those events in the order that is emotionally effective. i don’t really care if a game forces me to go through the forest area first before i can attempt the icy area because maybe there’s things that happen in the forest area that inform later scenes in the icy area. maybe we don't need more superficial player choice open world concepts if it comes at the cost of the ability to write a story with actual significant plot events and character development in each section

[fishinateacup]

don't mind me binge reading this manga and dragging all of my friends into the pit of despair that is the witch hat atelier series.

anyway enjoy your doomed dads.

[kuttithevangu]

I just saw someone make the assertion that “everyone on booktok has low literacy, and romantasy books are bad because they’re catering to those people”

And this was meant to be a BAD thing. A problem. But if you actually believed that a massive population of low-literacy adults were buying books, becoming obsessed with them, and discussing them at length… wouldn’t that be a great thing? That’s how one moves from low literacy to high literacy: by practicing reading

Unless you think low literacy is an immutable quality reflective of poor character, in which case YOU are actually the problem

[narcissene]

affirmations:

- it’s fun to be awake & in an upright position

- consciousness is a gift

- i CAN do this anymore

[sunderwight]

"humans are space orcs" this and "humans are the jack-of-all-trades race" that and "humans are the ones with a reputation for trying to fuck everything" and etc but you know what I don't see too often?

humans are the moms

compared to other species on earth, humans have a really outsized "protect baby" instinct. you give a human a thing and tell them it's actually a baby thing and many humans will suddenly develop a complete and total aversion to harming it, even if it's like, a writhing mass of slimy tentacles in no way reminiscent of human infants

cats domesticated us by figuring out that they could leave their kittens with us when they went out hunting and come back and probably still have the same number as before they left. there is a decent chance that wolves did the same thing

word gets around the less parenting-inclined species and they're just like, are you doing a long haul space voyage? going to have to lay some eggs in the course of the trip? take a few humans with you. yeah they'll just start training the young and keeping from them climbing into the machinery themselves you don't even have to find specialists. I know a guy who budded unexpectedly on a freight hauler halfway through a four year trip, and not only did the humans not eat his spawn, they set up this thing called "babysitting" where they'd take turns monitoring its survival and helping to teach it basic skills

hazard is that if you're going anywhere with xenofauna, you have higher than normal odds of the humans trying to smuggle some weird creature aboard ship, though. you gotta watch 'em. on their own homeworld their officials have to put up goddamn signs telling them not to feed dangerous wildlife or try to touch the babies. most of 'em do understand the regulations and about potential bio hazards but there always seems to be at least one that loses their goddamn minds because some avian chick got caught in a mudslide or something

[ivy-michaels]

Tumblr did not “Goncharov” Poob. Poob is Glupp Shittoing Tubi/Pluto/Roku Channel/Hulu/etc.

[gender-luster]

none of these words are in the bible. or the dictionary, for that matter.

[hugintheraven]

#While this is a joke#For the etymologists out there#Tumblr did not “goncharov” poob#translation: Tumblr is not making a fictitious thing called poob that we insist is real#Poob is glup shittoing (streaming services)#Translation: Poob is now a generic name for whatever streaming platform is out there when you don't feel like naming something specifically

[cushfuddled]

I read this aloud to my roommate and he thought I was having a stroke

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

does anyone know how to talk to girls

[st-just]

So like the actual reasons are obvious and boring. But I am always kind of amused by people who get super angry about historically inaccurate diverse casting (for whatever value of 'historically inaccurate', not relevant here) in adaptations of classical myths but then mysteriously have zero issues with all the ostensibly bronze-age Mediterraneans being played by the most northern european people on earth.

[fishinateacup]

sometimes i need to draw dumb things about dumb witches..

[dark-hell-princess-tamamolandia]

"I am the Sword of God" is like easily top 10 things to declare immediately before doing something really stupid that will probably injure you

[checkyourasianbias]

[lesbianeo]

I remember when I was in the middle of a DnD campaign and I introduced the actual Queen of England as a boss that the party had to kill and, like, 1 day later she actually died and it was so funny tbh

[miki-13]

Apollo's dodgeball

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[calvinandhobbes-rss]