Loss.jpg @miraculousstrider - Tumblr Blog

HEY DON'T CRY. 8,008 SPECIES OF FROG IN THE WORLD PER AMPHIBIAWEB AND THE 8,000TH FROG WAS DESCRIBED BY TUMBLR'S OWN FROG SCIENTIST DR. Scherz, ET AL., PEACE AND LOVE ON PLANET EARTH ‼️‼️‼️

werewolf-transgenderism

@lesmandposting I wasn't gonna say it but I'm glad you said it because I was thinking this also

bunjywunjy

walking to the corner trash can through suffocating heat with a dead bird wrapped up in a HAVE A NICE DAY :) takeout bag while the siren down the block wails the coming end of the world at 100+ decibels right at my head. is this hell

bunjywunjy

alexanderwales

Here's a legal PSA:

If you've committed a crime and a detective gathers everyone involved in the room, especially if he's not actually a detective and is instead a novelist, puzzle-setter, psychic, fake psychic, dog, chess grandmaster, etc. ...

YOU SHOULD NOT CONFESS.

Every year, hundreds of people are put away by non-traditional "detectives" who have either inserted themselves into the case or are working with the police in a dubiously legal capacity as advisor. In 99% of these cases, the murderer gives a full confession even though the evidence against them is circumstantial at best and often requires a long just-so story which can only guess at motive.

If this happens to you, stay quiet, do not attempt to defend yourself or talk your way out of it, only say "I want a lawyer".

Now if you find yourself being investigated by a boy genius, magician's assistant, anthropologist, classics scholar, or philosopher, it's likely that refusing to talk to the police (or investigator with no legal authority) is merely the end of the second act, and by the end of the third act they will have you dead to rights.

YOU SHOULD STILL NOT CONFESS.

Make them take it to court. Force the eccentric detective and his straight-laced police partner to take the stand and explain their methods to a jury of your peers. Have your lawyer look at the chain of custody on the evidence, especially if you believe it to have been handled by someone who has only bumbled into detective work through their natural charm and/or unique set of skills and outsider perspective that come in handy more often than they should.

Know your rights. Don't let eccentric detectives put you away.

#my cousin vinny

were--ralph

tumblr is the funniest social media site to go viral on

were--ralph

on tiktok people will quit their jobs after going viral once but on here not only can any post get 50k notes, but if it does theres nothing you can do with it. theres no monetization or any transferable skills at all. you just made a funny post and people liked it and thats the start and end of your career

were--ralph

you could say "i left the stove on" with no context and it might break containment on here and people start tagging it with ships and kins and theres no way to delete it forever unless staff gets involved. your mistake will never go away but your claim to fame will instantly

were--ralph

its like yes im the pineapple werewolf guy but no one outside of here and like 5 posts on reddit will ever know what that sentence means. i could jump on tiktok and no one would know me. no one on youtube or facebook. this is my little corner of the internet and i will die here before i give up that title and when i do know i lost nothing in the process

were--ralph

exactly

sometiktoksarevalid

pukicho

Sometimes my dad likes to put little pills in my food. And in those pills is more of the food.

pukicho

theweirdwideweb

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

vigilantsycamore

eeby deeby... i haven't heard that name in years...

digitaldiscipline

themakeupbrush

Please witness this absolutely insane video of Cindy Bruna trying to get out of a car in a Giambattista Valli dress at Cannes

derinthescarletpescatarian

There somehow just keeps being More Dress

dalniente

muscleluvr4-deactivated20140223

why the fuck is it called the xbox 360 what does 360 mean???????????????????

wariolands-blog

when u see it u turn 360 degrees and walk away

viseriontargaryen

turning 360 degrees would face you right back to the xbox you dipshit

davekat-deactivated20130315-dea

btc-official-deactivated2024071

this post somehow still in circulation despite everyone involved being deactivated

rain-droplet

even you

hufflepuffharukananase

Even me

cheese24k

This guy plays the tune of Jason Mraz - “I’m Yours” using two Nokia Phone

carry-on-my-wayward-butt

this is so fucking relaxing

4ngelbride

IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS FOR TWO FUCKING YEARS

sailor-artemis

When you’re too broke to afford a Launchpad

charlesoberonn

Peter Jackson's Amazing Digital Serkis

*insert Gollum animated with the style of Pomni*

klingonrealitytelevision

I wish more people used Magic the Gathering's Color Pie instead of D&D's alignment all of the time.

Like, saying a character embodies the selfishness and impulsivenes of Red Black offers more depth than Chaotic Evil

asteroidtroglodyte

It’s substantially deeper.

asteroidtroglodyte

Good enough for me

The Colors of Magic

[as it applies to Character types]

I hate Good vs Evil as a Character alignment choice. Hate hate HATE hate. I’m sorry, but Good and Evil can be measured along many axes, and fucking nobody wakes up in the morning and goes “golly I sure do love being Evil! Gonna go make the world worse on purpose because I’m just so awful!”

Get the fuck outta here with that Protestant-ass characterization. I got something better for you:

[Watsonian; the colors of magic are drawn from different landforms, such as islands or mountains, and are characteristics of a type of magical currency called Mana which serves as the mechanical resource used to cast spells.]

[Doylist: each color has its own philosophies and opinions and perspectives about the world that influence Design beyond simple aesthetics]

Hence:

Each Color has its own axioms about Good/Evil!

White: Without Rules, without Order, without Law, there is only Chaos, and Good cannot exist amongst Chaos. We must all do our part.

{I’m gonna use pink for White because it’s the most “power of heart” color}

Blue: Ignorance inevitably results in Evil; Good can only be accomplished with Knowledge. Even distasteful or horrifying Knowledge has Utility.

Black: People will label anything that they Like as “Good” and whatever they dislike as “Evil.” Whoever has the most Power gets to dictate what that means in practice.

Red: Ya wanna know what’s Evil? A single man ordering around thousands of others! “Evil Empire” is redundant, all Empires are “Evil.”

Green: The nature of Evil is to Take more than is Needed, to Exploit, and to Exclude. If one wishes to be Good, one should endeavor to be Respectful, Generous, and Harmonious.

—-

As you can see, this gives us substantially more dimensionality for characterization.

asteroidtroglodyte

So let’s flesh this out

Your standard high fantasy village is in grave peril. The village elders confer, and a champion is chosen to go forth to save the village.

Why is the village in peril?

Red: A despotic Tyrant has been building an Empire, conquering kingdom after kingdom and bringing them to their knees. Even if you surrender, your culture and way of life will be destroyed.

Green: This village has long been a haven for Outcasts, Misfits, Freaks, and Weirdos. It’s tucked away, not very rich, but rich in Love and Family and very nice hand crafts. Unfortunately, it sits on top of a large copper vein that the Imperial Treasury wants to exploit, and you all are very much in the way.

White: Your village has long suffered raids from bandits, barbarians, and outlaws, and the strain of recovering each time is becoming too great; something must be done.

Blue: The land suffers under the iron-fisted rule of a despotic tyrant. Your village has discovered the secret to his awful power and how to destroy him. Unfortunately, he knows that you know.

Black: Truth be told, your village isn’t actually “in peril” (at least, not any more than usual). Nobody sent you. You were not chosen. But there is Evil afoot, and you are offended by this Evil, and you will see to it personally that it ends.

klingonrealitytelevision

I'm at work atm but yes all of this. You understand the complexity beyond just Good Vs Evil and how the colors are both a simple and complex character building tool. And you haven't even gone over the beauty behind wedges/shards (yet?)

Chaotic good? You would do good above all else? How? Because using the color pie you've got White Red, a passionate fight for justice, almost zealot like.

White Blue, perhaps justice at the cost of some personal freedoms? A calm controlling fight because they know best

Or White Black, justice for you and yours. A fight where the ends justify the means and history is written by the winners.

I could classify all of those as Chaotic Good, but they're all technically different.

asteroidtroglodyte

cracks knuckles

Chaotic Good:

[in a Dystopian Punk setting]

Blue: A digital archivist sits at a bank of monitors, collecting, preserving, and distributing banned books, explicit art, and radical music.

Black: “Why? Because fuck ‘em, that’s why. Who says they’re the Good Guys? Them? You gotta open your eyes, man.”

Red: “I just feel like, if you wanna live in a Free Society, you gotta occasionally inconvenience those who are accustomed to getting whatever they want.”

Green: The Secret Police would kill him on the spot if they knew how many Scapegoats he had smuggled to safety. He had no great love for these people, but as far as he was concerned they were innocent and did not deserve to die.

White: [Actual Public Face of The Resistance. Wrote The Manifesto. Spends most of The Revolution de facto imprisoned.]

ladyphlogiston

I don't really get this yet (especially the difference between Red and Black tbh) but I'm going to read more about it because it is cool

asteroidtroglodyte

You see, the colors are partially defined by their relationship to each other; they don’t fully make sense without discussing all 5. So.

Red is also an ally of Green, whereas Black is allied with Blue. They both hate White.

What does this mean?

You probably noticed that both Red and Black are Selfish; their motivations are intrinsic, and they do not believe that they owe the world anything. This is what we mean when we say they are both “enemies of White”, as White in this context is the color of self-sacrifice, of giving yourself away.

But they disagree on other points.

Red and Blue are enemies. Blue is ultimately concerned with Control; of the self, of others, of the laws of reality itself. It pursues knowledge, and treasures it, but generally does not believe that it should be free to all. Blue gatekeeps.

Red hates all of that.

Black? Black is fine with it. Considers it useful, even. Black and Blue are allies. They get along fine. See, Black is much more likely to have minions than companions; more likely to desire sycophants than advisors. Additionally, Black and Blue both understand Politics.

Vise versa; Black and Green are enemies. Can’t stand each other. Green thinks Black is an ego-driven narcissist and will absolutely call them out on it. Green doesn’t take any one person very seriously. Green is a big fan of councils and democracy; Green likes community gardens and libraries. And when Black tries to pull a power grab, tries to assert dominance, do you know who will be standing right next to Green saying “not on my watch?” Red.

Red and Green get along fine. They both appreciate the world for what it is. They’re not trying to conquer or subjugate it. Red says “Strength is Freedom” and Green says “Strength is Responsibility” but they both agree that things like political machinations and inherited titles are a subversion of The Way Things Should Be.

So.

Yes, Black and Red are both Selfish, they do not consider The Community to be their personal responsibility. But. They have very different opinions on the subject of Authority.

ramblin-tiger

I've been playing MTG (Magic the Gathering) since 2010/2011. And let me tell you, @asteroidtroglodyte has put the color wheel of MTG Into alignments PERFECTLY. While I could add to it, I am under no illusion that I could do any better or even as well as they have. Even if you know nothing of MTG, you should read this in its entirety because it is so painfully accurate that it feels good.

And if there is ever more additions? I shall be here waiting because this is pure gold.

asteroidtroglodyte

(Ah yea, validation, that’s the good stuff)

Cracks knuckles

[The color pie performs a]

Casino Heist

White: The Organizer, the Team Leader, the Mastermind. They’re not even in it for The Money; they’re gonna give most of it away, donate it to charity or something. Their principle contribution is the team itself: knowing the right people, being able to convince them to join this mad scheme, coordinating them through The Big Plan. Nobody else is capable of wrangling a Crew like this.

Blue: The Technical Wizard, Master of Gadgets, Hacker of Computers. The actual technology involved is irrelevant; this is the person who understands the arcane secrets: they have Keys to The Backdoors; they know exactly how long the Important Door is vulnerable; they know the things the Casino doesn’t want them to know. They will spend the money gaining more control in their life: more anonymity, debts settled, perhaps a new identity.

Black: The Face, The Impersonator, The Confidence Artist. Gets recruited to The Crew when the White interrupts them in the middle of a Confidence Scheme. Consummate liars, actors, impersonators; they can be whatever, or more precisely whoever, is required by The Heist. In it for the money. You can always trust them… to act in their own self interest. Sex appeal part of the toolkit almost by default.

Red: The Escape Artist, Driver of Getaway Vehicles, Captain of The Exit Strategy. Unfazed by Chaos, unruffled by changes to The Plan. Generally heavily ADHD coded, with a pinch of Adrenaline Junky sprinkled on top. Master of vehicles, evader of Law Enforcement, the one responsible for ensuring everyone’s freedom at the end of The Plan.

Green: The Muscle. Martial Artist, Mercenary, or Military Veteran? A good question that will never be adequately answered. The Casino is very likely to resist being robbed, and Green is here to Apply Force. The precise nature of that force will depend on genre and rating, but if there’s gonna be a showdown with law enforcement or security, that scene will be Green’s moment of glory.

wizardofbones

I'm trying to understand green, and differentiate it from white. So green and white are both colors of peace and community, but their relationship to blue is different.

Blue is the color of progress, of never being satisfied, of an unending crusade of betterment.

White, as an ally of blue, takes a similar mindset, of "I want to change the world for the better." White wants to unite the world under its own banner of peace and law.

Green, meanwhile, opposes blue's obsession with progress. It's the color of tradition and preservation. Green is less concerned with changing the world. Instead it believes in protecting it from any force of control. It's also more concerned with local concerns than the entire world.

Did I get that right?

asteroidtroglodyte

Yes

[to elaborate]

Green and White resemble each other (from a distance, if you squint) for a lot of the same reasons Red and Black resemble each other: in the simplified “Good Vs Evil” systems (like D&D), Black/Red is “Evil” and Green/White is “Good.” Green and White agree on things like “serving the community” and “the greater good.” They both believe in self-sacrifice, which is why they both hate self-serving, egocentric Black.

Where they differ, much like Red and Black, is in their relationship to Authority.

As you observed, White’s amicable relationship with Blue is indicative of White’s desire to enforce an agenda; they want to change the world. White’s agenda is nominally one of Peace and Harmony, but, unlike Green, White isn’t actually willing to take “No” for an answer.

White believes in Authority by Rule of Law; White loves Rules; White is an Empire Builder.

Green? Not so much.

You see, things like Empire have certain requirements: for example, having an administrative ruling class necessitates a subservient labor class. Having “Rule of Law” necessitates things like “state monopoly on force” and “law enforcement.” And Green? Green spends waaay too much time hanging out with his buddy “all cops are bastards” Red to really have enthusiasm for “Crime & Punishment.”

Green is very Grounded.

In a room full of White soldiers, a man in a fancy hat makes a speech about sacrificing your life to secure the nation’s future. There is cheering.

In a room full of Green warriors, the exact same speech is met with “If I die in some field far from here, who exactly will protect my family? You?”

Not to imply that White doesn’t care about their family as much as Green does! They do! But “family” means something different to each of them.

White values the Family Name. White wants to have a bazillion babies and encourages them all to be doctors and lawyers and judges. White is a disciplinarian who believes in tough love. A good plan to make a White-aligned parent proud is to go forth and accomplish things.

Green values the Family Members. Green encourages their children to just be themselves, even if that’s not exactly in line with what society expects. Green prefers the carrot to the stick. One of the best ways to make a Green-aligned parent proud is to simply be there for your family.

The grim side of Green is that Nature is both brutal and savage, and Green doesn’t actually see a problem with that. Predation and Plague both have valuable roles to play in Nature, and Green respects that. Green is also skeptical of things like “private property” and has very little ethical issue with simply taking things (when in need).

So, yea. You hit the nail on the head there.

asteroidtroglodyte

CONTROL

[so what’s Blue’s deal?]

Every color has 2 allies and 2 enemies. Blue is allies of White and Black, and enemies of Green and Red.

What does this mean?

Blue and White share a big picture perspective. They care about abstract ideas: ideas like Justice and Fairness, concepts like Civilization and Progress. White and Blue can wax philosophic together through many days and nights, eagerly debating the finer points of Law and Order over endless cups of coffee.

At a different table, on a different night, Black and Blue discuss different sorts of ideas. Ideas like Politics and Tactics, or the gap between Power on paper and Power in practice. They sip expensive whiskey in a private corner and discuss Secrets and Gossip; make plans together to secure their interests.

Blue bridges the gap between Black and White. Black wants the power to help themselves, and White wants the power to help others; what Blue wants is the power to acquire more power.

But there are 2 major obstacles: Red and Green. You can’t control these guys; they don’t take orders.

Green’s utter lack of ambition makes them impossible to tempt or bribe. They’re endlessly sentimental and highly skeptical of anything new. Believing that life is already perfect, they cannot be sold on the idea of Progress.

Red will disobey an order just because it’s an order; even against their own self-interest; just to prove a point. Red is deeply emotionally motivated, and being ordered around feels bad. Plus, Red is incapable of taking anyone seriously, which rubs Prideful Blue very much the wrong way.

When left to its own devices, Blue will do Research. Ultimately, what they want is to understand. They wish to know how the universe works so that they can manifest their will and ideas into it. Blues are thinkers.

eldritchsandwich

There is a lot more on this on the magic the gathering developer’s blog thing

squiggelsquirrel

I want to add:

Colorless - Mostly mindless artifacts, robots, etc. that can be used by anyone and don’t have an agenda. But also eldritch aliens who’s agenda is too incomprehensible to fit the color system.

Multi-colored - Some individuals, groups, etc. are best regarded as a mix of two or more colors. This can make for some interesting combinations that may not feel like they perfectly fit the 5-color system.

magus-of-the-color-pizza

Approved. Good explainer, @asteroidtroglodyte !

fierceawakening

Just to add to this excellent post:

Black is often portrayed as the con man or the person who gets ahead at any cost, which isn’t by itself evil but often lends itself to bad guys (or antiheroes who end up doing good things for personal and selfish reasons.) But I think there can be unironic Black aligned good guys sometimes too. Black is very individualistic like Red. “I want to make my own way. I want to prove myself. I want my rank in society to be something I earned.”

Think the way American culture describes capitalism. (Whether it’s an accurate description is a controversial topic and one I’m not especially interested in arguing about here.) Rather than social rank coming from bloodline, anyone can succeed if they’re innovative enough, clever enough, or ruthlessly efficient enough.

Which means that someone who is Black aligned might be less personally greedy or cutthroat and more “to hell with a society that orders us to protect us. Even if a world where we’re all free is cutthroat and harsh, we can decide who we want to be and fight for it honestly there. If we lose we can hone our skills and get back in the ring.”

Black/red is often depicted as essentially Chaotic Evil, but I think it can also be Chaotic Good. Just not the friendly kind.

I’m writing something now where the protagonist is clearly the good guy, but (as I interpret this stuff) is black/red. Her enemies are the evil, “thinking for yourself is bad so let us do it for you,” version of white/blue.

(There’s a Discworld quote I see now and then that I very much see as good guy Black. It’s the one where the witch fights for what she cares about because it belongs to her, and “don’t mess with what’s mine.”)

asteroidtroglodyte

Magic The Gathering was first created by one Richard Garfield, while he was in college. He was pulling inspiration from Early Dungeons and Dragons, and the same fantasy pop culture references that Gygax & Co were pulling from, along with his own Jewish upbringing. In the very earliest sets, White is unambiguously GOOD, black is unambiguously EVIL, and blue, green, and red have very little ethical stance, being mostly flavored around things like “red mage cast fireball!” And “elves are forest wizards!” It was very much an unbalanced mess, in terms of mechanics and design philosophy.

It wasn’t until years later, under the helm of Mark Rosewater, that the colors began to really inhabit their current philosophies, which were clearly also influenced by some more nuanced ethics. This is where Black gains the ability to be the “Good Guy” and white the ability to be “bad.”

Under the new framework, and discarding the historical association with angels and demons and other such trappings of abrahamic faiths, Black becomes a valid ethical stance. In fact, one could argue that Black is the de facto core color of modern economic thought. But that’s another post

If you go digging into my post on 2-color characters, I make the argument that The Owl Lady, Eda Clawthorne, is a Black/Red hero.

I’m taking some liberties, to be sure, but I read Mark Rosewater’s blog for years, I studied quite a bit of ethics and philosophy in my spare time, and I feel pretty confident in my understanding of the ideas behind these things.

mantis-lizbian

the other thing i really love about the colour pie is that characters can be multiple colours (and sometimes can even change colour over time, but usually due to very significant events). and any 2 or any 3 colours can actually be combined into a relatively coherent philosophy for a character (though usually one of the three - typically the one in the middle, in the case of 3 colours - will dominate at least slightly), which further highlights the relational aspects. in the game and lore of MtG, you can even have 4 and 5 colour characters, but these are fairly rare (4 actually being rarer than 5, and 5 often representing very powerful characters who are either gods, god-like, or have basically attained enlightenment) and i wouldn't typically recommend trying to consider them if you wanted to figure out your own OC's color identity.

raptorific

twinkhole-destroyer

someone is putting up pictures of me around town and they all say I’m ‘wanted’. which is nice

isawken

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

isawken

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me

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