I'm really really tired

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I'm really really tired
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Greetings and salutations,
In other words hi everyone. I know that you probably won’t give a crap about what i have to say but I’m currently losing my fucking mind and i wanted to use this current state to my advantage and talk about how current feelings don’t define what sort of person you are or the life you lead. Okay so right now I am 17, living in Glasgow/Scotland (The most boring place in the world) and I’m sitting here slowly giving into the ever increasing darkness that usually sits in the corner of my mind. I’ve been having a really hard time resisting my temptations to give into the darker pleasures of life (I’m basically Anakin throughout the prequels). I’ve been insulting myself for a while as a weak form of catharsis while I listen to my music and as I spoke down to myself i realised that this happens to me quite a lot. I think that it happens because despite being a very confident guy who speaks to everyone, i find it difficult to connect with people, everyone I’ve gotten close to has always left after uttering my favourite punchline “I won’t leave, I’m not like everyone else.” I think what I’m trying to say is that I don’t feel like i have anyone here beside me who I can express my thoughts to so I’m afraid I’ll have to broadcast them here (I’m sorry). So getting back to the point of this very spontaneous post; basically I just wanted to say that even though in the present moment, the world can seem like the loneliest place and the people resemble monsters you heard about as a child, this feeling doesn’t last. We humans live in a society that is disgusted at the idea of having to wait for something; if we want light then we flick a switch and if we are hungry then we order take-out. This is a problem. We must try to learn patience, otherwise we’ll be driven insane as soon as we can’t get something we want. If we want love and don’t have it, we run to porn. Or if we get a little sad we lock ourselves away and ignore the noise of the world. My friends please take courage and know that these temporary pleasures cannot sustain us. The toughest choice is usually the correct one, please don’t give in. I believe that I’ve said enough. No one will read this but I have, and that’s enough. I love you all and know that you always have a brother/sister who will help you. Stay groovy.
UNCLE BEN
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