Call me Mortis

28, she/her, this blog is for all my hyperfixations!

[ladysantos]

typhon, father of all monsters

[isawken]

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

[bluelois]

Blue Lois

[isawken]

can i help you

[redmarge]

Red Marge

[isawken]

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

[crazysodomite]

their love is so powerful that they can show me cartoons for free

[cheaphalloweencostume]

jesus christ i have to actually draw in order for me to be drawing again

[willisiam-woodiam]

'oh damn! i wonder why i suddenly have 50+ activity!"

the suspiciously 50+ activity shaped mutual:

[loveridden1999]

seeing beautiful women in low cut tops with boobs spilling out is good enough reason to stay alive

[yargoelster]

[kriosv]

[junk-thunder]

[citation not needed. no prablem]

[thelovelyunderground]

Klaasje on the roof

[capacity2]

a question for you

Lay it on me mister fuckinyouhard0989

[capacity2]

He’s so shy he died

[solavei]

a summary of the consequences of my life because I read percy jackson

[solavei]

1. I steal my older brother’s PJO books, read them, and download Pinterest on my Kindle to get my first taste of fandom 

2. I spend a lot of time online, secretly, and am exposed–for the first time–to the fact that it’s weird that I share a room and bed with my dad and am not allowed anywhere else 

3. My dad brings me to a corn field and tells me obama is the anti-christ who’s been sent by god to end the world, as foretold by the bible. I believe this and cry when he’s elected because i don’t want to die 

4. I begin googling and discover that my situation is not great. I begin a careful attempt to ~distance~ myself from my father by sleeping anywhere else through any means possible. Eventually, I’m allowed to sleep in my own room

5. Now that I’ve been exposed to the real world and the fact that I’ve been groomed, I’m not ~obedient~ anymore and my dad Dips(™) to find a new kid. We lose our house and have to move to government housing in a new city 

6. Eventually my parents divorce because of this. My dad moves to a horse ranch. I visit him on the horse ranch, think it’s cool, and invite my friends over for a sleepover. I have my first gay kiss with a girl in a tent. The next day my father tries to ~kill~ me on the horse ranch(™) with a golf cart

7.My dad disappears from the face of the earth. He forgets his phone is connected to the family iMac. We know all about the crimes he is committing. He fakes a heart attack in a Wal-Mart at some point, idk

8. The FBI is onto his life of crime. He flees to Romania to escape them and lives with a millionaire Romanian woman. She’s suspicious of him after a while. She hires a private investigator and unearths his life of lies and crime. He flees to Alaska. He gets a roommate in Alaska. The roommate goes to federal prison. We never hear from my father again. He is, perhaps, dead.

9. It’s revealed to us that my grandmother is also involved. She’s been smuggling drugs from the hospital. She also goes to federal prison. Also apparently my older brother and I aren’t related. This was another scam from my father

[solavei]

Understandable response

[jem-jam]

uhhhh hh hh hhh

[doc-notreally-salas]

Me reading from point 2 to point 3:

[nekfores]

— I love my pasihypnos and how Pasithea is so colorful in the background of Hypnos.

more warm version cuz I love it!

[prof-grace-aspen]

I really think everyone needs to truly internalize this:

Fictional characters are objects.

They are not people. You cannot "objectify" them, because they have no personhood to be deprived of. They have no humanity to be erased. You cannot "disrespect" them, because they are not real.

[nope-the-weeb-deactivated202408]

I know this has good intentions, so I will just add the "how you treat them, even as objects of fiction, can speak about your own character, be careful out there"

[prof-grace-aspen]

Your addition is actually completely antithetical to my message. It is literally the opposite of what I am conveying.

Stop telling people to encourage the cop inside their head.

How you treat fictional characters, given they are entirely objects of fiction, does NOT necessarily speak to your own character, and you do not need to be "careful".

It is not dangerous to imagine dark things happening to fictional characters. It does not mean you are secretly a bad person. It does not mean you unconsciously want to hurt people in real life. It is not a "slippery slope" to doing bad things to people in real life. You cannot damage your brain or turn yourself into a bad person by consuming "dark" fanfic.

I can write tentacle noncon of my favorite character all day long and be a fierce anti-sexual assault advocate in real life because what I do in my head is not the same thing as what I do in real life.

[askinfresh]

These tags were too perfect to not include

[kawaii-pigeon]

In case y'all need pictures sorry it aint in crayon 🖍️-

[cheesefags]

2-YEAR CHEDDAR

from GRAFTON VILLAGE

I usually try to review cheeses virginally - that is, ones that I’ve never had before. In this case, this is a cheddar I’ve had many times before. But I couldn’t leave it off the blog, what with its obvious appeal to leather and rubber fetishists.

As far as cheddars go, Grafton’s 2-year aged isn’t going to shock you. It’s mild, light on the salt, with a slightly sweet and grassy flavour. It’s got a nice texture. It’s dense, more moist than I expected, and smooth.

So what is the deal with the gummi suit on this cheese anyway? Well, cheese has obviously been around a lot longer than fridges. Fresh cheeses like mozzarella are too moist to last very long outside of a cold place (bacteria and fungi do so love damp places), though I don’t think anyone was too mad about eating that stuff quickly. But cheeses that have been aged (and dried) more have some more preservation options, which is where cheese wax comes in. The wax is a physical barrier, stopping fungal spores from landing, and also blocks moisture and air, making the cheese a pretty unfriendly place to grow. Even drier cheeses can be bandaged in cheesecloth and then slathered in lard to preserve them while allowing some ventilation.

I gotta admit: hot wax isn’t really my thing. But cheesecloth bondage and grease… it has potential.

[dumbpuppyfag]

this site used to be awesome

[redmessredmess]

Pulp fiction reference

[amphibifish]

never do any sort of collaborative storytelling with your friends youll get addicted for life