Seize the Day @mrsynyster - Tumblr Blog

big squirrel

had a dream last night that my alarm was connected to twitter and everytime i hit snooze it publicly tweeted it with a disparaging little message along the lines of “filthy horrible boy has slapped the screen again, and slumbers on” so that your followers could shame you and i was deeply, DEEPLY humiliated but that did not stop me from hitting snooze upwards of 14 times

slytherverse

hey op! i couldnt sleep until i built this! you motherfucker!

just gotta “borrow” my sister’s alarm clock

get that twitter api, write the bot in some python bc god is dead n slap together some fuckin UI with legos

your idiot self wants to sleep in???? hit that snooze button a couple times???? (maybe 4 times in a row)?? disgusting.

twitter knows! bc it posts how many times youve hit it. fuck you

the next step is NOT profit. noone profits. everybody loses. go home.

feltguy

OH MY GOD?????????

ultrafacts

Source More Facts

foxfairy5

Yes this could have to do with the fact that Freya the Norse Goddess of love, beauty and fertility drove a chariot pulled by cats.

bryarly

So, if I ever get married, I fully expect a catmobile.

ultrafacts

One of the other reasons why they gave cats to each other was for their valuable skills as mousers. Cats were able to control rodent populations around their properties.

Also, Norse myths are thought to have the earliest literary descriptions of the Norwegian Forest Cat. They were described as large, strong cats that drew Freya’s chariot and were so heavy that not even Thor, God of Thunder, could lift them from the floor. (Source)

prokopetz

They kinda live up to the legend, too. Your average Norwegian Forest Cat is twenty pounds of solid muscle, with claws large and strong enough to climb solid rock. They’ve been known to attack bears when defending their territory. And yet they’re one of the cuddliest breeds out there, particularly noted for being patient with small children.

nekoama

I have a Norwegian mix, and can attest that she is the cuddliest cat but also insane enough to try and fight a bear.

roguetelemetry

Viking cats “FIGHT ME”

ninety6tears

Whosoever holds this hammer, if he be worthy, still could not lift this cat.

howdidthisevenhappenanyway

I always love it when this post comes round because a) giant kitties who Thor can’t lift and b) that picture omg boar riding and flower throwing is a good thing

babyanimalgifs

Son I can see you

nightinngales

bruh…

prime89

Wait, if their names are puns on their power, then Violet is ultraviolet which is invisible to the human eye.

freshest-tittymilk

SHUT UP.

earlploddington-deactivated2019

13 years

advanced-procrastination

Y'all are gonna flip your shit when i tell you about Dash

anxietyproblem

snorlaxatives

good morning cruel world

the-little-engine-that-couldnt

Don’t you mean goodbye?

snorlaxatives

no i meant good morning. this world may be cruel but i’m still kickin’

fishyfellow

This really cheered me up

hungwy

Gonna b honest. A lot of hot ppl go to art museums. I’m one of them

e-seal-deactivated20210319

im 2 ugly they won’t let me in

e-seal-deactivated20210319

that and my shirt that says “i eat oil paintings when security guards aren’t looking”

kvothbloodless

Listen i understand this is a surreal joke, but like i cant stop imagining qhat would happen if u actually showed up to a major art museum with that shirt. Like not a tiny art museum. What would happen if you showrd up to the Met Museum of Art wearing a shirt that said “i eat oil paintings when security guards arent looking”? They cant just ignore it. But like, are they gonna deny you entry over what is clearly a joke shirt. Do they have u wayched. Its 2 am and i need to

mrsynyster

"Nothing good happens after 2 am"

forursmiles

babyanimalgifs

You ever seen a cat with a deep meow??

brbjellyfishing

that cat smoked 3 packs a day for 20 years

toytowns

“woah, wow, woah”

bunjywunjy

get this cat a jazz contract, stat

pizzaotter

HAUSVIABEJSBAKMSJDK WHAT IS THIS OMFG I LOVE HIM 😭

chocolatemilk4029

Imagine staying over at their place for the first time and shitting yourself in the middle of the night because you think james earl jones is meowing at you from the door

hotdogsngiggles

oh my god

daddyfuckedme

reblogorelse

The Good Place Season One Gag Reel

p0dunkpunk

For those of you who don’t know, I work at an anarchist co-op coffee shop.

Apparently, all the Chicano/Cholo boys in my neighborhood have caught on the the fact that I sneak food and stuff to all the little punk kids and homeless kids at the coffee shop.

There are three in particular who call me Mom. Not Mami, not Ma, Mom. The rest refer to me as “Miss”.

They’ve decided to always have one of the three of them there with me on my night shifts. (Especially after they witnessed the last bad shift where I had to kick a bunch of tweakers out. Said tweakers lit my fucking bulletin board on fire.)

Tonight, one of the boys actually charged up a crackhead who wouldn’t get out when I told him to leave.

About an hour later, I was emptying bus tubs when that same lovely boy walked in and wetted a wash rag. I asked what he was doing and he told me not to worry. So, I went about my business, doing dishes, bussing the main dining tables, etc.

I’d left a broom in the smoking room and a fresh trash bag in the bathroom for once I was done with the dishes.

When I walked out, everything was spotless and the trash had been replaced. He’d wiped all my tables, swept, mopped, and emptied all the ash trays.

He’d also picked the lock on the bathroom so his friend could take out the trash for me. (Which I’m not sure whether I should scold him for. Haha)

They snuck around and did my closing shift duties to thank me for keeping them warm and fed.

I’m fucking crying.

casanova-lives

Kindness begets kindness.

kotas-dump

Picking a lock so you can take out trash for someone who’s nice to you is the most chaotic good thing i’ve ever heard. <3

borbamenasmoved

duality

borbamenasmoved

the surgery was a success.. the boy is complete

homunculus-argument

Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is alchemy’s first law of Equivalent Exchange.