The Truth Is Out There

🌸Mandy, INFJ, late-20s, she/her, Pisces 🌸Currently reading: The Long Game by Rachel Reid

[throwbackblr]

[mjsloveslave]

I’ll never get over the fact this was based on a picture of the French crying as Nazis took over Paris in 1940. They even captured the two ladies in black behind him.

[grimeclown]

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

[grimeclown]

Snakeyes Pete is from Toronto he gave me a button once that said "Canadians have the best luck" and i said i thought that was the Irish and he said "I fucking hate the irish" and i said okay

[turing-tested]

Sorry am on lsd. Shouldn't have told you 2 eat a sandwich. That is your decision not mine. Sorry

this ask is so awesome. my favorite part is I can't find the other ask they're apologizing for.

[watch-the-sun-rise]

PHM characters as text posts: Pt. 4/?

Part 3 -> Part 5

[stitchthisfiona]

Today in niche genres of joke that I can never get enough of and will probably still be secretly thinking about four years later

[cleolinda]

[cleolinda]

[lotus0kid]

[lotus0kid]

[pomme-poire-peche]

[lotus0kid]

[sashaforthewin]

[sleepy-bebby]

Baby Clifford & baby Snoopy

[misc6x6]

[omomix]

it was just a misunderstanding

[omomix]

post-timeskip

[bewbin]

wait what did nintendo ds stand for? dick sucking??ewwwww. the dsi? dick suck international??? ewwww

[zephyrusphi]

yuo cant say this during plague month

[zephyrusphi]

pride month. pharohs curse got me

[longnuts]

Does anyone know what to do

[princecarlton]

[ruinedchildhood]

[stardynamite]

THE WAY SHE POSED AFTERWARDS HFKFBDK

[stardynamite]

My artistic rendition:

[nylarac]

[tsunderrated]

[silk-fleur]

if I don't sit in my room alone for at least 4 hours a day, I will go crazy

[peachblossom-odyssey]

[fagcrisis]

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

[maryoliveoil]

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich

[abbiistabbii]

The Germans really cooked making "Hobbyless behaviour" an insult. It is both devastating, applicable to a wide range of people and behaviours, and doesn't resort to swearing.

Man ranting on the internet about the Superbowl halftime show or complaining that something is "woke"? Hobbyless Behaviour. Girls mocking another girl for not looking right? Hobbyless Behaviour. Mindless vandalism? Hobbyless Behaviour.

It is more powerful than "get a life" or the English "You're Sad" because it gets to the central point of the matter, and that is wonderful. Danke, Deutsch.

[should-be-sleeping]

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

[should-be-sleeping]

I kept it in a terrarium and it became a normal 🐸 despite everything. About a year afterward (I thought) it died, so I sadly put it in a shoebox in the shed until the ground thawed enough for a proper funeral but when that day came I opened the box and the frog was fine.

[justprettygay]

[should-be-sleeping]

This is funnier than anything I have ever said.

[should-be-sleeping]

This post is to Easter what a Geiger counter is to radiation.

[should-be-sleeping]

I see it’s *looks at smudged writing on hand* Lent again.

[transfemininomenon]

when your non-binary friend offers to buy you dinner and the waiter hands you the bill

[dankxsinatra]

[drtanner]

The cat is so stoked to be there??? What a little star. 💜