BirdBrain

*sandwich voice* the world is vast and beautiful and i have a sandwich

expertmistake

*wiggles fingers* balicazam!! Your sandwich is now yarn

idk what you did and normally i wouldn't complain but my sandwich has straight up vanished as if by dark magic

im not even joking my sandwich is gone and i am fucking pissed

motherFUCKER i bet i lost it on the railway tracks

ok im on a train right now. so what happened is I was rushing with my precariously-stacked luggage with my sandwich on the top. and unfortunately it was a vertical sandwich (baguette) and i didn't tie the plastic baggie shut. fucker slid right out of its wrapper

somewhere in this train station is a single perfect naked sandwich lying peaceably on the ground

MOTHERFUCKER I WAS RIGHT i lost it wheeling my luggage (jostling) across the tracks. i can see it from the fucking window. it's just sitting there, taunting me

the train leaves in 5 min, I'm already in my seat, and as stated the sandwich is lying buttnaked on the train tracks.

i still kinda wanna run and get it tho

fuck it im gonna

GOT MY FUCKEN SAMMICH

it's always "gaud i thought you were doing a bit" and "gaud did you seriously risk missing a train & losing your luggage over a dirt sandwich" and "gaud don't eat a sandwich off the ground." never "how was the dirt sandwich, did you enjoy the dirt sandwich, was the dirt sandwich good???"

alexsrandomramblings

So, was the dirt sandwich good?

eh it was just ok

in semi-related news, today i discovered a new thing about myself! turns out if it's delicious enough, i am both willing and eager to eat a slice of cake that has been swarmed by ants. those lil hivemind cowards are super easy to fight off and in the end barely any of them stuck to the frosting

hazelthehidden

How was the ant cake tho

#reblog #textpost #meme #the sandwhich is important. i would fight anyone for a dirt sandwhich in this senario ngl.

it was SCRUMPTIOUS actually thank you for asking <3

insane some people don't use ad blockers? babe why r u rawdogging the internet

it's a CESSPIT out there. wrap it before ya tap it babes!!!

the notes are insane

"im on mobile" adblocking exists for mobile

"im broke :(" ADBLOCKING IS FREE

"im lazy" i truly sympathize with executive dysfunction, but this is one of those quality-of-life things you need to prioritize. 3 minutes of research/installation will save you a thousandfold in time and energy. it can even help with brain fog (most people don't realize how much mental energy ads actually steal)

"i like ads" my jaw is on the fucking floor. you chose to live in a sewer, yet you will never be a ninja nor a turtle. you do not have a warrior's heart.

sickviking-fr

"adblock exists for mobile"

"Adblock is free"

That doesn't sound real but okay.

#reblog #textpost #meme #gaud #ngl i had to reblog for the splinter at the end

*inhaling deeply and reminding myself that Shaking The Baby only endangers the baby, and does not assist it to learn or grow* in spite of everything there are beautiful and important truths within this world that you must learn, and i must help you to learn

cat-mermaid

onlytibki

Most ghosts refer to Clockwork only in hushed whispers—not prayers, because you don’t pray to an unmeddling god, but respectfully nonetheless because he is always Watching

Meanwhile Danny, every once in a while, glances over his shoulder into the camera and goes “Do you see this shit??”

#reblog #danny phantom #textpost #to be fair the shit that he is seeing is so stupid #danny fenton

supreme-leader-stoat

"Give us your government-issued ID to access our app's full features" babydoll you are text messages.

#reblog #textpost #god if there's one thing that's been pissing me off #it's the stupid age verification thing on absolutely everything

byjove

growing up as an imaginative single child, I loved to play with Barbies. I loved creating elaborate drama-filled storylines for them and I could keep at it for hours. there was one problem. I had like 15 thrift store Barbies and no Kens. I only had one Barbie-sized male doll and it was a collectible Elvis Presley doll and he was my favorite doll. I always did the Elvis voice when I was playing him but he had no relation to Elvis Presley otherwise. anyway, he had some crazy days. trapped on a scary planet where he is the only man in the world and half of the women there hate him. in a massive car accident and stranded in the woods with a girlfriend who had broken her foot and a crazy ex girlfriend who had stalked them there. kidnapped by Athena (one of my Barbie sized dolls was Athena, like, the goddess) and held captive by her while trying to go home to his 7 situationships. all of this happening to a guy who looks and sounds exactly like Elvis but is otherwise the quintessential everyman.

byjove

going to be saying this periodically forever now

#reblog #textpost #meme #dear god that's so fucking funny

gothamscanner

#reblog #textpost #meme #dc #gotham

sokodraws

iron lung, eh?

cool movie, I liked it

#digital art #reblog #iron lung #markiplier #ahhhh this is so cool

samwiselastname

editing is so fun. I'm learning what the story I wrote is about

samwiselastname

sometimes after you learn what your story is about, you resolve to write a thematically appropriate sequel. this, unfortunately, means you have another section to edit, and now your story means two things. maybe more. imagine.

nudibranchparty

This post understands editing like nobody else. Everybody else delete your blogs. I want to be alone with OP so we can talk.

#reblog #textpost #meme

obi-wann-cannoli

Absolutely insane how little Anakin cares for politics or principles.

His wife is a senator. He wants to be on the Jedi council. The Chancellor is his mentor.

And yet while everyone else is discussing bills and executive orders and even saying ‘isn’t it counter to the republic’s ideals that the chancellor is being given all this power?’ His only responses are well I don’t know anything about all of that, I just know the Chancellor’s my friend and he always tells me I’m the specialist boy ever.

obi-wann-cannoli

It hits very different reading this as an adult with the political situation as it is. Anakin has very clearly fallen hook line and sinker for the propaganda that says only Palpatine can keep the republic together, that Palpatine *is* the republic, and that Palpatine, the only person to recognize his worth, clearly deserves to have all the power.

Never mind that the entire galaxy knows his exploits and admires him. Never mind that he has a wife and best friend who say they’re proud of him. Never even mind that Anakin doesn’t even have any use for the power being on the council would provide! He wants to be told that he deserves more than he has and Palpatine’s the one who validates that.

#reblog #textpost #star wars #anakin skywalker #gotta be real it's this in particular that messes with me when it comes to his character #i could understand his path of villainy being manipulated and lied to. the killing kids thing ruins that for me ngl but i can sympathize #especially if you add the idea that a part of his issues is fearing that his loved ones will see him as a monster after his blinded rage #at his mother's death #with palpatine using that fear alongside everything else #but his lack of care and greed are what makes him less of a character i can deal with when that's what resulted in #[waves vaguely at everything outside]#the baby killing can be written off as “easy way to prove a person's become evil” alongside the scary yellow eyes if you must #the rest really can't

andruillus

steph! ⭐drawn on clipstudio paint

#reblog #cool art #dc #stephanie brown #something about the whole drawing screams a laffy taffy texture to me

ectospacecadet

Oop, Nick’s done it again.

The NYCC exclusive Danny Phantom pins referenced/traced @umbrihearts art!

Oh fucking hell.

Quick update: I did message them. We'll see how this plays out. I'm hoping to settle this civilly.

Still waiting on a response from Nickelodeon. -_-

#reblog #art theft #serious shit

So with NYCC less than two weeks away, I've decided to make a public post about it. I really really REALLY didn't want to do this. But this is unfortunately the fastest way to get their attention so that the pins can be pulled before the convention.

in the cambrian period the ocean was shallow and the sun never set. every day was sunday morning and there was never any dark. the world was a watery wonderland and air didnt exist yet. animals had just invented eating eachh other and it was really funny. having eyeballs was all the rage

its true ❤

what do you know ❤

the ocean was made of sprite also