memes and more

yo dude/pal/alien

[kenmoos]

What do you do if your bitey boyfriend is a serial post-coital yapper

[nultemp]

the massive power of trains yet confinement to a single path makes them comparable to angels

[hyenagirl-pseudophallus]

The idea of a “corrupted” or “fallen” train is causing so much chaos in my head. The theological and engineering implications….

[brightwanderer]

[mysticalseven]

downloaded XKit, the world is in order

[gasmeros]

i feel like tumblr would expose super heroes secret identities real fast with all its crazy ass jokes

[gascreates]

[threewayradio-deactivated202005]

Why would you fuck Adam sandler

it was on my bucket list 

[bee-enthusiast]

Does the ‘was’ entail you already have?

[threewayradio-deactivated202005]

yes

[afloweroutofstone]

Top 25 Tumblr post

[4444555666777888999]

I have searched everywhere for this I almost thought I hallucinated it

[goofballproximitysurveyor-deact]

when people put "trigger warning" on their content without specifying what the trigger warning is for

[durendoll]

take me down to the bearadise city where the girls are bears and they bare bear titties

[silly-style]

[mysticalseven]

i am returning

i dont know how to use tumblr anymore

[catchymemes]

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

Now I want to get married just so I can do this.

[baneismydragon]

If I were a billionaire I would absolutely tell my secretary to send wedding gifts to anyone who sent me an invite regardless of if I knew them, because- A. I know how expensive that nonsense is. B. I would be a billionaire and when else am I gonna do with that much money? Honestly… and C. I would totally make showing up at random weddings with crazy awesome gifts my new stress relief hobby. “Congratulations random strangers! I admire your daring and stratigic planning. Here’s that 700$ tea set you wanted but assumed no one would ever buy.”

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

Do you even have to be getting married

Are they gonna check

[fan-enby-anonymous]

Damn it sure is

[mysticalseven]

Oh

Hello Tumblr... Long time no see

[facts-i-just-made-up]

Before You Follow...

This Blog Posts:

NSFW, and several other letters.

Untagged Gore, and other former vice presidents.

Hardcore Pornography of fish, slugs and rotifera.

Graphic Nudity of invisible people.

Hate Speech against all forms of parasitic foot infections and fungus.

Profanity and Vulgarity, including the ð-word.

Spoilers, including clotting agents and mold.

Please Do Not Follow If:

You are Anti-Vacs. Vacuums are just as legitimate as brooms and mops.

You think Races aren’t real. There are many, including the Tour de France.

You are Pro-Life. All life is evil and should be exterminated.

You are Pro-Choice. USDA Choice is inferior to USDA Prime.

You don’t believe in God, and furthermore that I am God.

You are offended by offensive things that offend you.

I Tag:

People who are not yet “It.”

Yak ears and other livestock parts.

Days in German.

Pillows, and those tags can’t be removed except by the consumer.

Items for sale.

Only Follow If:

You are over 81.

You are human, humanoid, or neither.

You remember what this is:

You are the 1%. Not a rich person, you must be an actual percentage.

You support. I don’t care what but you must be load-bearing.

Finally:

Caterpillars

[buzzfeed]

24 absolute madmen

[buzzfeed]

R.I.P.

[everythingkin]

people saying “me” really bugs me bc it’s like. appropriation of kin culture. I really don’t know how to explain it but saying you are someone without iding as them is really disrespectful to people who get bullied and targeted for being kin. you don’t have to go through the struggles of being kin but you get to make a joke about it. it’s not your fucking joke to make.

[redbonealien-deactivated2019111]

i literally feel like i’m in a time space continuum every time i open this app

[herokind-archive]

[acoolguy]

does anyone know who played jerry on seinfeld?

[banderboucher]

It was Tim Allen you asshole

[acoolguy]

just because i’m dumb as shit doesn’t mean you should use a foul cuss

[christinecanigula-archive]

you know when you’re at the dentist/orthodontist and they give you that AirTube that just gets rid of all your spit and makes you feel like you met a wind god and deepthroated his tornado dick

[sspider-mann-deactivated2018071]

SUNDAY FUNNIES!

“PEANUTS” (July 26, 1951) By Charles M. Schulz