As of Yet Untitled

[lesbianmarrow]

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business

[tunnaa-unnaa]

taking notes

[ok-notgood-probablybad]

[perlukafarinn]

first post for context / see the tag 'open relationship au' for more snippets or the masterlist so kindly put together by @tafkarfanfic. it's time <3 (or is it...?)

July 2015

Shane texts Brian that he had an unexpected brand opportunity come up and that he'll be out of town for a few days. Then he books it to his cottage.

It's maybe cowardly but just this once, Shane thinks he's fine being a coward. The thought of seeing Brian right now makes him feel uneasy, like being on the ice without any padding. The version of himself who thought he could love Brian again seems like a stranger to him now. Shane doesn't want to become him again but he can't trust his own judgment, so. Safer to stay away.

Being alone in the cottage helps him gain some equilibrium, even though the closer it gets to Ilya's plane touching down in Montreal, the slower time seems to pass and the more Shane feels like clawing his skin off.

He still kind of can't believe Ilya offered to come. It makes him oddly giddy thinking about it, sets off a flutter in his stomach like he's some teenager with a crush.

Rose said you should stay single, he reminds himself. But then, She doesn't know Ilya, though. She wouldn't have said that if she knew him.

God, he really is turning into a teenager.

It should feel scarier, considering his track record. Shane has no rational explanation for why it doesn't. Why, despite everything, Ilya feels so safe to him.

The day Ilya arrives in Montreal, Shane drives back home feeling miraculously calm. It's like locking in for a game, he reasons. He knows the play, knows he has teammates backing him up, so now he just has to execute it.

Shane beats Ilya to the apartment by a couple of hours. He experiences a brief moment of panic when he hears a knock on the door, a vivid imagine of Brian standing on the other side popping up in his head.

It's Ilya, of course, which does nothing to slow Shane's heart rate but does make his stomach swoop funnily.

"Hey," he says, breathless.

"Hey," Ilya replies softly. He looks a little bit shell-shocked, eyes scanning Shane's face like he can't believe he's real.

Shane wants to kiss him so bad.

But first thing's first.

Ilya doesn't join him for the actual breakup. Even Shane, with his compromised judgment, recognizes how crazy that would be. He stays in the car outside, which shouldn't be a problem because Shane doesn't plan on letting this drag out.

"It'll be ten, maybe fifteen minutes," Shane tells him. His hands feel sweaty around the wheel of his car so he removes them, rubbing them on his pants. "If I'm not back in twenty, you can come in."

Ilya's eyebrows quirk. "That's quick."

"I can't do a whole confrontation," Shane says. "I just need to tell him it's over. I don't - I don't owe him anything more than that."

It feels kind of true. Shane counts that as progress.

"You don't," Ilya agrees.

He takes Shane's hand, squeezing it. Shane squeezes back, the touch grounding him.

His palm still feel warm as he's knocking on Brian's door.

It takes Brian twenty-seven seconds to answer. There's a surreal moment as he opens the door that Shane braces himself, expecting some flood of emotions, only for nothing to happen.

Shane is looking at his boyfriend of eight years and he feels nothing.

Then his eyes catch on the yellowing bruise on Brian's cheek and something does stir - a hollow kind of pain at the center of his chest.

He lied about that bruise so easily, his story seemingly designed to knock Shane off-kilter.

What else has he been lying about?

"You're back," Brian says once the door is closed. He smiles. "You know, you could have let yourself in. That's why I gave you a key."

"Right." Shane reaches into his pocket, fist closing around said key. "I actually - I came to give it back."

Brian blinks. "Give it back?"

"And to break up with you," Shane adds.

It slips out and Shane immediately regrets how flippant he sounds. Brian laughs, because of course he thinks it's a joke.

"You're fucking with me, right?"

"I'm not."

Shane tries to hand him the key. Brian's arms stay stubbornly at his side, smile sliding off his face. Finally, Shane puts the key down on the counter instead.

"You're fucking with me," Brian repeats shakily. "I don't - is this because of Vegas? I thought we were moving past it. Things have been good between us since we talked it out."

It's an unpleasant reminder of how differently they've been viewing this relationship. "Things haven't been good. I haven't been happy."

"Then you're not trying hard enough." Brian takes a step towards him, hand held out. Shane steps back. "Shane." His voice turns pleading. "Please, think it through. You can't give up on us just like that."

"This isn't a spur of the moment decision," Shane says. He really didn't mean to get into it but God. Has Brian always talked to him like this, like he's a stupid kid who doesn't understand his own heart? "I haven't been happy with you for a while."

"Is this because of Rozanov?"

Irritation shoots through Shane. "Fuck off."

"It is," Brian says, eyes heated. "We didn't start having problems until you started fucking him."

"And whose idea was that?" Shane snaps. He huffs, uncertain if he's more angry at Brian for making this so difficult or at himself for getting distracted. "It doesn't matter. I wasn't happy before we opened the relationship either. It's - you're not good for me. I don't think you ever were."

Brian laughs incredulously. "I get it. You need me to be the bad guy, huh?"

"That's not what I said."

"Might as well have. If I'm so awful, what does that make you? Why would you choose to be with someone who apparently makes you so miserable?"

"I was sixteen." Shane feels his shoulder hunching, feels the way he's making himself smaller, and forces himself to straighten. "I didn't know any better. You took advantage of that."

Brian goes still. "You're kidding me. That's your excuse?"

Shane's stomach twists. "It's not a fucking excuse."

"I didn't even know your age."

It didn't stop you once you found out, Shane almost responds. He can't. He feels exhausted all of a sudden, imagining going through every shitty thing Brian has done, having to argue every point and listen to Brian try to minimize it or pretend there wasn't any harm.

Shane doesn't want to do any of that. He just wants to get out of here.

He wants to see Ilya.

"I'm not gonna do this with you," he says. "It's over. We're broken up. Have a nice life, or whatever."

He turns to leave and Brian grabs his arm. Shane shakes him off unthinkingly and Brian flinches back at the force of it.

"Shane." Brian's demeanor has shifted completely, voice gone soft, eyes pleading. "Please. I can't lose you."

It's incredibly unkind, but Shane can't help but think he's being pathetic.

"I've hurt you," Brian continues, taking Shane's hesitation as some sign of his willingness to listen. "I understand. I never meant to, but I did and I'd do anything to make it up to you."

He's not even saying sorry. All of these theatrics and Brian can't even be bothered to apologize. Shane wonders if he even realizes it.

He shouldn't be entertaining this. He's not actually gonna forgive Brian. And still, "You could start by telling me the truth."

"The truth?" Brian echoes.

"How you really got that bruise," Shane suggests mildly. "Why you came to Vegas. Why you even suggested an open relationship in the first place, when you were fucking other people already."

He doesn't mean to let that last question slip but it's been eating at him since Rose suggested the possibility. He takes no pleasure in seeing Brian's face pale and knowing that she was right.

"Who have you been talking to?"

Shane wants to punch something. He wants to throw up. He didn't think it was possible for him to care so much when he doesn't even want Brian anymore, but it hurts all the same.

Rose was wrong. Shane is stupid. Naive and too trusting for his own good.

"It didn't mean anything," Brian is saying. His voice sounds far away. "It was a moment of weakness. You're the only one I love, the only one I've ever loved."

A sharp knock thankfully interrupts him. Before either of them can react the (apparently unlocked) door swings open.

"It's been twenty minutes," Ilya says. He shoots Brian a dismissive glance before focusing his attention on Shane. "Are you finished?"

Shane has never been happier to see him. "Yeah. Yeah, let's go."

"You can't be serious," Brian says weakly.

Shane ignores him. He reaches the door, allows Ilya to place his hand on the small of his back and guide him past the threshold.

Brian doesn't protests again. Maybe it's finally sinking in for him that it's useless. Maybe seeing Shane with Ilya made him stop wanting to try. Or maybe he fucking spontaneously combusted.

Shane wouldn't know. He didn't look back.

[firstprinced]

the sweetest bug

[aeligsido]

AU where Ilya's father dies before Irina can commit suicide, so she ends up not doing it and Ilya grows up with his mother instead of his father. He still goes into hockey and professional but less because he needs to escape Russia and more because he really really likes it and wants to have fun with it (and there's a kid in Canada who can keep up with him.....)

(also his brother never becomes an asshole and addicted bc he didn't need to deal with their father + depression + their mom's death and his feelings about it)

Anyway ofc Ilya still pursues Shane with all he has and ofc Shane kind of fold for him (in every ways ehehehheheh i'm hilarious)

But also I have this scene in mind where Yuna and Irina talk during the draft after party and Yuna is internally grinding her teeth bc this woman's son took her baby's spot and victory but she is still being Polite so she's making small talk and.

Yuna: And what about your husband? He must be proud of your son too, right?

Irina, unfazed: Oh, he died a few years ago.

Yuna, assuming Ilya's parents were about the same age: Oh, I'm sorry! Was it an accident, sickness?

Irina, very obviously still in her thirties-not-yet-forty: Oh, no. Old age :)

Yuna, Who Knows How To Do Math: Ah. I see.

Anyway they became friends and it becomes a meme in the hockey fandom that rivals Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander are forced to interact bc their moms are besties.

[sabotage-on-mercury]

Rolex invites Shane to the Royal Box at Wimbledon again and this time Shane accepts because Rolex specifically asked if he could bring his husband as well and fuck yes he can and together Ilya and Shane are ready to serve so much cunt. They both get dressed in some sharp, elevated summer suits, Ilya in Versace and Shane in Gucci, the dramatic sunglasses & the bitchiest, judgiest mogging are ON, they mirror each other as they cross their legs; occasionally they're holding hands or sit with Ilya's arm around Shanes waist, they are the epitome of power husbands & this is their playground. Do they have one clue what is going on on the court? Of course not. That doesn't stop them from having a fabulous time showing off each other. They know they steal the limelight looking as devastating as they do, together. Turns out these dreadful PR appointments are actually incredible fun when you have your husband/best friend/soulmate with you and Shane can't imagine how he ever did this without Ilya.

Now picture this, occasionally they whisper into each other's ears, sometimes its just sweet nothings and sometimes it's some devastating chirps about tennis, and each time a precious smile breaks through, only for each other, but it drives the photographers wild.

(afterwards, Ilya is excited to have the perfect summer with Shane where they fuck their way across europe)

[mutinsfromthemoon]

ilya mic’d up talking with his teammates about recipes he’s been trying recently and tricks he’s been trying to teach anya. and shane mic’d up barely having something that producers can actually use because of the amount of swears

[hockeyhockeyjoyjoy]

Examples of Ilya quotes from his mic'd games:

"You try the steak rub, Bood? Good, yes? Yuna is a queen, I know. Yes, next weekend is good for barbecue, if weather holds. Littlest Pikes might visit, we will see."

"She will jump through the hoop on ground, why not 4 inches up?? So frustrating. Shane says to use real bacon for treats, maybe then, but is so salty. Nitrites too, you know. Bad for her. No, have not baked her special treats, Troy! What?? Recipe, now!"

"Shanya has new glasses. Very sexy. Even without them he can see puck better than 47, though, on wing? This man is terrible, yes? Is not entirely his fault, probably, Columbus is mostly very bad. Look at stupid tape job, though. Ugh."

"I want syrniki after game. You want? I have made you syrniki, Luca. Little pancakes. Yes, very, very good. Okay, not tonight, but come over on Saturday, we will have syrniki and force Shane to eat it too. Yessssssss, okayokay, good plan."

Examples of Shane quotes from his mic'd up games:

"Jesus FUCKING Christ what the FUCK is wrong with the Dallas refs holy SHITTING ass. Can they not fucking see their own fucking asses? Do they need fucking Lasik?"

"I am going to goddamn disembowel the next person who chirps us about the FUCKING baby shower. That shit was cute and Cassie fucking loved it. Come the fuck on, it's what fucking year? Men can throw baby showers, shit. Get over yourselves, assholes."

"He thinks he's hot shit, yeah, with ugly fucking edges like that. Fuuuucking ridiculous, am I right? What a motherfucking joke. Let's run a train on his ass next shift, you fucking in?"

"Dyks, I fucking love you, man, that shit was insane, so fucking dope. Yeah, yeah, I know Hazy loved it too. Broke their shit right up, they thought they had a lane, hahaha! As fucking if with you on the ice, bro. Nice. Fucking nice."

Ilya: Suburban Dad who plays some rec league, maybe

Shane: Intensely professional jock insulted by your basic lack of talent and skill, might kill you

[a-stray-thief]

After playing in LA, Rose takes the Cens out to party. The rookies are besides themselves, Wyatt geeks out so hard that he gets to meet more actors who play superheroes, Luca gets hit on by three different models and takes at least one of them up on it, and Ilya let's out his inner club rat and is just enjoying being in a good club. Shane goes along to spend time with Rose and make sure no one pukes in front of a camera again (looking at you, Holmberg!). Ilya, Shane and Rose end up leaving together. They’re all a little tipsy—the club had good Russian vodka, so Ilya had a lot and Rose joined him to “bond” and Shane indulged in a few beers which he still doesn’t do a lot during the season even though he’s more relaxed about his diet now, so they’re all not entirely sober. Outside of the club, they’re a little loud which draws enough attention that people recognize them—well, let’s be real, they mostly recognize Rose although someone says “isn’t that the gay baseball player from that Calvin Klein ad?” when they see Shane—and several people start filming. Which is of course when Rose’s heel breaks and she lands ass over teakettle on the sidewalk.

Shane and Ilya are immediately concerned and Rose tries to wave them off, “my heel just broke, guys,” and Shane says, “you broke your foot?” and Rose laughs and says “no, my heel” and waves her broken shoe around, the red sole glinting in the light. “Why are you wearing fucking low quality shoes?” Shane asks, honestly confused, and Rose gasps, “Shane, they’re Louboutins!” And Shane very seriously says, “well, then Louboutins are fucking bad quality,” which has Ilya cackling because he definitely knows Louboutins, probably even owns a pair, and knows that they’re not low quality at all. But now there’s a video out there of Shane Hollander calling Louboutins low quality and that’s going to be a fun time on the internet. Then Shane helps Rose up and she wrinkles her nose and says, “ugh I hate walking barefoot in downtown LA,” and Ilya says, “don’t be ridiculous, we carry you,” and Rose is all, “oh piggy back ride,” and Shane says, scandalized, “you’re wearing like a miniskirt, everyone will see your ass if you do that,” and scoops her up bridal style. And then he carries her down two blocks to the sushi restaurant they chose for a late night snack and the video of that goes even more viral than Shane’s Louboutin critique.

[bitchass97]

My Shane is an enabler. He’s gonna roll his eyes and tell ilya to fuck himself, but he loves that shit. He’s icing Ilya injuries after a fight barely hiding the fact that he found it funny. He’s providing information for chirps. He’s joining in on the fun cause he loves his husband. Idk man I just don’t think Shane, who fell in love with the NHLs biggest asshole is gonna be annoyed when he’s being an asshole.

[your-cab-is-definitely-here]

So one afternoon at the cottage, Ilya has been in and out of the lake all day, excited like a kid, splashing around and clowning and fascinated by the wildlife and showing off for Shane. And after they finally head back inside and shower off the lake smell, Shane settles on the couch with a book and Ilya flops down with him, stretched out with his head in Shane's lap and whining until Shane frees a hand to sink into his hair. And it's been such a nice full day and it's all warm dozy sunshine and the lovely earthy nature smell that's everywhere around the cottage and Ilya has his face tucked into Shane's stomach where he can breathe him in, the familiar scent of his detergent and body wash, and Shane's big warm hand is in his hair and Ilya's pleasantly tired and drowsy and so comfortable that he just... drifts off, the kind of wonderfully indulgent nap that he never really gets during the season and finds hard to justify when he's in Russia for the summer.

But this year he's not in Russia, and he slips into this warm syrupy slumber while Shane pets through his hair (incidentally making a disastrous mess of his curls) and reads his book. When Ilya eventually rouses, with a happy grumble of contentment, nuzzling closer into Shane's stomach, he can feels Shane laughing gently at him almost before he hears it.

"Did you sleep well?" Shane asks, and that sounds warm and syrupy too, and Ilya rolls over so he can smile at Shane and revel in the smile he gets in return.

And then Shane says, "Are you hungry? It's almost dinnertime," and Ilya realises he's been lying here, napping and pinning Shane to the couch and wasting both of their time, for hours, and he jackknifes upright so suddenly that Shane startles back.

"Fuck!" Ilya spits out. "I was--fuck, has been so long. Why didn't you wake me up?" already guilty because Shane had wanted to make some pasta thing that he was weirdly excited about and they'd talked about maybe playing more Chel but now the whole day's been napped away and--Ilya sneaks a look---Shane's book is lying closed on the couch, bookmark set neatly aside, so Shane had finished his book and not even been able to get up to go do something else.

And he's just smiling at Ilya, completely unconcerned that Ilya's been idle and asleep and... and... lazy, all afternoon, just glad Ilya had a good nap.

Shane's frowning in mild confusion at him. "Why?" he says, genuinely not seeing the problem. "You were napping, it was nice. I mean, if I'd needed to pee or something I'd have got up but I was fine." He reaches out and smoothes some of Ilya's hair down. "Oh, the pasta. We can do that tomorrow, we have all that salad from lunch and rolls and there's peaches if we want dessert."

Ilya must have responded somehow because Shane beams at him and says, "Cool, I'll go set the table if you want to go wash your face." He smirks and pokes at Ilya's cheek. "Got a little drool there." And then he smacks a kiss on Ilya's head, gets up, and trots over to the kitchen while Ilya just sits there reeling.

Anyway it's really important to me that Shane dismantles all of Ilya's awful self-talk about laziness.

[gentlesleaze]

My mom care's a little too much about hockey. Yeah, I see where you get it from.

[scunthotter]

I know I've talked about Ilya being frustrated he can't brag about pulling Shane but you know who else would be frustrated about not being able to brag? Yuna Hollander would be so frustrated that she basically has the two best hockey players in the world in her family and she can't even bring up that now she has TWO sons in the mlh and oh what is your son up to Sharon? Hmm that sounds rough that you have to send him money every month. She's in meetings, maybe there are other players agents and managers and they try to bond by putting down Rozanov and she wants to go "your client couldn't even touch Ilya's points per game. Don't fucking talk about one of my boys." and she's so pissed off by the interaction she gets that player removed from the brand deal.

[fuckyoucanada]

Hollanov canon au Shane gets outed but no one can identify the guy and they decide to hide ilya’s identity until they don’t have to worry about his Russian passport only now there are a bunch of men coming forward claiming to be the guy and so Shane has to state the guy who will remain anonymous is his long time partner and then guys online keep trying to convince him that they wouldn’t hide/to break up with that guy and Ilya is basically foaming at the mouth at this point.

He counts down the days and as soon as he doesn’t have to worry about russia he starts posting online asking Shane Hollander to pretty please consider him for his next boyfriend and Shane visibly flirts back and people are going crazy because does this mean that the other guy is out of the picture or???

Only they post a picture of them together a few days later that reveals Ilya was the guy all along and the internet explodes

“I can believe I asked Shane Hollander if Ilya Rozanov could fight I just barely escaped with my jaw intact omg”

”sorry I said I was better looking than your boyfriend I have taken my humble medication”

”what kind of power does hockey robot Shane Hollander hold to pull rose landry AND Ilya rozanov???”

[lilylikeswords]

@heatonice I have no self restraint and too much free time. I apologise... (there's also a baby Ilya and an adult Ilya now)

[bitchass97]

I need everyone to STICK WITH ME ON THIS ONE

In an alternate universe:

Ilya Rozanov: Marley I have something really important to tell you. I have hidden a secret about myself for a long time. You are one of my closest friends, and I hope that knowing this doesn’t change anything…I’m bisexual

Cliff Marlow: (visibly confused) yeah…I know that???

Ilya: what? How did you know???

Marlow: Dude you don’t exactly hide it

Ilya: What are you talking about????

Marlow: yeah dude you speak Russian all the time. You have an accent. It’s not that crazy

Ilya:…

Marlow:…

Ilya:…

Marlow:…

Ilya: THAT IS BILINGUAL YOU IDIOT-

[finelytaylored]

you can see the heart eyes from behind the sunglasses I can’t handle this 😭

[shilyas]

condo stairway scene gets me every single time bc of the way ilya lingers. the way he takes way too long to tie his shoes & adjust his jeans, the way he stands for a moment even though his cab is definitely there & the way he teases shane as he slowly lowers himself to give the sweetest, most unhurried kiss goodbye.