NJ Rocks

19 | they/them | this blog is 16+

[nj-saysstuff]

Bruce can either be a really good father or a terrible one, there is no in-between. It all depends on who he's with and if the reader/writer really understands what they're talking about.

[lazarus-lazuli]

i have no comment this is just the funniest fucking thing i’ve seen all day

[destiel-news-network]

(Source)

This comes one day after the archive changed their status to “Omega” for April Fools’ Day.

[finelytaylored]

TIME TO DIE !!!

[fractally]

I am a fan of the dynamic where there's no leak and Shane moves to the Cens of his own accord and then Shane and Ilya never come out exactly but they just live openly and all these dumbass hockey players are just like

"Oh yeah they're just like that. They live together and room together and vacation together and get mad if they're separated on the bench. And they kiss in the locker room sometimes but it's you know. They're joking around. Good guys. Gay? Well---no I don't think so. I mean that's weird. Roz is a pussy hound. I mean I've never seen him with a woman but you know he is. Anyway Hollander had that whole thing with Rose Landry and he still talks about her, I think he's still hung up on her. Poor guy. I did walk in on Hollander sleeping on Roz's lap the other day but they were just getting in sync for power play you know? You reporters always want to make everything gay it's so weird. What do you mean 'why do they kiss so much' they're the top goal scoring duo in the league"

[jojobear06]

Me after i’ve spent hours looking for a specific fanfiction, and I come to the conclusion that it’s been deleted.

[interplanetary-redacted]

can ilya do a backflip?

yes

no

Voting ended onApr 2

[imissthembutitwasntadisaster]

People will be so mean to teenagers do you literally not remember what it was like to be sixteen. Every time I talk to a teenager I feel I should hold their hands and tell them I think they're one of the bravest people on the planet just for choosing to endure but I don't because I don't want to be creepy.

[femmedefandom]

the domesticity of the cottage destroys me. what do you mean that when given the chance these two curl up together in front of the fire, call each other’s names, touch toes while wrapped up in cozy blankets on opposite sides of the couch, tease relentlessly, demand kisses while relaxing lakeside, play football and video game hockey because they can’t live without a little friendly competition, sleep all wrapped up in each other and so deeply, play around like boys, and offer devotion like men.

[itshype]

Yes, the fics where Ilya goes to Shane's game in his jersey are cute and romantic. But why has no one even considered:

[my-2nd-account]

The thing is that Ilya has no fucking clue what autism is. He probably read the word when some twitter user called Shane autistic and wanted to look it up but got distracted by a post about Shane's tits or smth.

What he does know though is that Shane folds his clothes before sex. And he smiles at him with adoration when he does it and doesn't rush him or make fun of him for it. He knows Shane doesn't always pick up on his jokes and sarcasm "That's French, Ilya" but he doesn't mind it and would never make Shane feel bad about it or dismiss his response "Yeah I know, Shane". He knows Shane has a PhD in The Arts of Overthinking "Now the bed's all dirty" so he playfully chases his worries away and closes all those open tabs in Shane's brain "What? Shut up". He knows Shane will not rest until he has everything in his life under control so he grumbles when Shane wakes him up in the middle of the night to tell him how they can make it all work but still listens intently to his plan. He knows Shane feels overwhelmed and anxious when stuff doesn't go down as planned "This is my actual fucking nightmare, Ilya" "I'm okay I'm just freaking out I'll be okay in a second" so he softly comforts him and supports him through it "Then maybe it's time to wake up, yes?" "We're good here, your family's here, you're boyfriend's here, we're good here, ok?" He knows Shane has to hear it to believe it "My boyfriend?" so he gently goes "I mean yes, I think so, probably".

He doesn't know Shane is autistic but he knows Shane and he loves Shane and Shane happens to be autistic

[gobloggirl]

[aslongasitsblack]

this specific frame is so important to me like … they were boys together lowkey …

[namunii]

When you're trying to forget your years old situationship but his manager is Yuna Hollander so you see his face everywhere...ho

[eugeniedanglars]

major league hockey fan watching ilya kiss shane’s helmet at the 2017 all star game and posting “god had to put ilya rozanov and shane hollander on rival teams because otherwise they’d be having so much gay sex they wouldn’t have time for hockey” and then a few years later reblogging themselves like “WELL”

[academicblorbo]

Ilya meeting Shane's parents must be insane for them like. Mr Ilya "The Terminator" Rozanov, terror on ice and menace in bed, politely stands there. Your very shy son admonishes him for using the word "lovers" and Russia's Greatest Rage Machine just takes it.

You ask when this started and Mister Dickhead makes sure Shane is accurate about when they started this. How dare you stave off half a year of us, Shane?

You ask if they talked to Scott Hunter and Ra Ra Rasputin says that he, famous asshole extraordinaire went to talk to Patron Saint of Hockey Gays to offer him congratulations.

You ask if he has no loyalty to Boston and Mr Fucking Fuck San Francisco is like. Nyet

Your son is having a panic attack and Miike Snow Genghis Khan calls them "boyfriends" and it's your own extremely shy and sensitive and loving son that is like MY WHAT

[mothsartart]

“your face isn’t even in it, Hollander. calm down.”