diablo raises an eyebrow.

18+ only interact (not everything here is adult content) // for Guaranteed Filtering add my username to your content filter list- this works even if you're following me! // if you follow my main these are the sorts of posts you'll probably never see there. [and i don't have any cold desserts for you.] // if i show up in your notes i don't mind you seeing this blog. if you want me to stop interacting over here, let me know!

[notsorbeteither]

everyone focused on the base premise of two trucks but no attention on the line 'my big fat heart expands'. grinchcore. for no reason

[deoxoid]

his wife has filled THEIR house with ANTIQUES. to AVOID DAMAGING HER VALUABLES i fuck him on the floor

[mxjackparker]

Tarts with Hearts: Sex Workers in Love will be a fiction anthology of pieces written by sex workers, all including sex worker characters and their love. These stories may be romantic, familial or platonic.

With such a lack of authentic-feeling fiction about sex workers, this book is intended to be a contribution which will spark more sex worker stories. Whether you love a cosy romance, a protagonist suffering a relatable heartbreak, the found family trope, or character studies focusing on family dynamics, there will be something here for you!

Tarts with Hearts: Sex Workers in Love

An anthology of sex worker fiction, by and about sex workers in love.

If this interests you, please share it! The project can only get funded if enough people consider it worth backing, and I'd really love to get sex workers paid. Anything about sex work online gets censored so your sharing means a lot.

[polishwave]

[savyir-genesizz-the-wizard]

[Polish. A red writing on the wall saying "no smoking" changed to "beating meat compulsory" with a black sharpie]

[str8-for-pay]

32 Faces You’ll Recognize If You’ve Ever Had Anal Sex With A Penis

[nicolekidmansgrinchhands]

[tanookitoes]

i want a public execution of the writer of this abhorent defience of god

[moonsofmoons]

This, was a journey.

[definitelynot-youraverage-brit]

Oh. My. God.

What have I just read????

[madeinthotland]

I mean…he is not wrong thought

[snazzy-adam]

I hate this almost as much as it hates itself…

[prokopetz]

I want a video game with realistic dick and balls physics not for any prurient reason, but... okay, so you know how in some games with boob physics, there's a palpable delay after a character model is instantiated before physics start to apply to the boobs, so it's like *pop* ... *FWOMP*? I want to see the cock version of that. Penis-having character spawns in, there's a beat, then the physics engine tries to play catch-up and applies a full second of gravitational acceleration to their junk all at once and they just randomly start helicoptering.

[midnightvoyager]

[a-kind-of-merry-war]

I've just found the single most homoerotic piece of LOTR art ever who wants to see

[outlaw-monarch]

Um, YES?

[a-kind-of-merry-war]

This is The Taming of Smeagol by Donato Giancola and by god they're gonna have a threeway with that wriggly guy

[divergent998-blog]

[jjbang8]

His wife has filled his house with chintz. To keep it real I fuck him on the floor.

[bemusedlybespectacled]

[wizardarchetypes]

there was a poll yesterday asking who is sexier, palpatine or smeagol and i was like "well talk about a rock and a hard place, but it's true that the answer is obvious" but when i cast my vote i saw PALPATINE was winning??????????????!!!!!!! palpatine is an evil dictator. smeagol has depth that palpatine never could. and with smeagol's nakedness at least we know what you see is what you get. palpatine??? over smeagol????? you people are so fucked in the head!!!!

[sexy-people-contests]

Who's Sexier? Gollum or Palpatine

Gollum (Package Deal with Smeagol)

Darth Sidious Palpatine

Voting ended onJul 2

[anocana]

i respect ppl who think frodo & sam were sucking & fucking constantly when the narrator wasn't looking. but personally i think the furthest they went was an awkward attempt at mutual handjobs one night in mordor which started as sam trying to do something anything that'd make frodo feel good & frodo insisted on doing it for sam too & sam closed his eyes & tried to imagine it was rosie cotton while frodo tried to remember the shire or focus on the texture of sam's rough hand or the unyielding heat in his own grip or think about anything other than the great burning wheel & neither of them succeeded. & frodo never got fully hard & eventually pushed sam's hand away but kept going & sam felt like he had failed & part of him wanted to push frodo's hand away too but instead he came harder than he had ever in his life & they never talked about it again

[archipithecus]

@the-warlock-syndicate

#gollum on the cuck rock

[buffyfknlo]

Communication is key

[prokopetz]

One of my favourite "exaggerating a physical feature for horny reasons" things for a kink I'm not into is how some artists draw people sweating. They draw people sweating like Studio Ghibli draws people crying – all oozing out out of their pores like Jello. Some of these characters are straight up sweating Orbs.

[zarkinthesub]

Are you saying someone at Studio Ghibli has a kink for people crying?

[ajaxgb]

No, Studio Ghibli has a kink for surface tension.

[prokopetz]

We sometimes refer to penetrative sex acts by the name of the appendage doing the penetrating – e.g., fingered, fisted, etc. – and of course we have appendage-related euphemisms such as "to dick down", but imagine if this applied more generally. Imagine a world where "I'm going to penis you" is plausible dirty talk.

[abyssaldyke]

Swear to god I am never so brutally socially anxious as when I'm trying to tip a gogo dancer at the club because like. The idea to tip always enters my mind at the drunkest possible moment of the evening and I forget all the previous tipping moments and scromble around in my bag for a dollar and then have to navigate the crowd and while I'm doing that I realize that it is in fact the drunkest moment of the evening but it's too late to back out, she's already seen me coming with my sweaty dollar so there we are. Me (drunk, strange) and her (standing at some profound level of elevation.)

And gogo dancers are professionals, right, like they're at work, so they're ready to sexily present somewhere for you to put the dollar but by the time I reach the pedestal I'm like. Remembering/possibly imagining all of my past awkward gogo dancer faux pas and thus am trying so hard to be normal that it wraps back around to being weird and so I stand there holding the dollar up over my head like a kid at the convenience store, hoping she'll just take it, but that's not how the social contract works so she strikes the pose, often already dripping with money and the strap of her g-string is the runway of a regional airport and the dollar a packed Boeing 737 and I'm on the horn with air traffic control (4 vodka crans) trying to thread that needle and then when I finally succeed and muscle my way back to my WIP (Wife of Infinite Patience) I'm like. Dude I just did Tony Tulathimutte's the feminist (le— and my wife is like you did not do Tony Tulathimutte's the feminist (lesbian version) to the gogo dancer you're literally fine just calm down.

But also like, what am I gonna do? Not tip?

[woman-becomer]

I shower like a real pervert. hot water, lathering myself in soap. sometimes I'm even naked

[kaylmao]

work like a red onion

play like a white onion

fuck like a green onion