Nottify @nottify - Tumblr Blog

i hate small talk . i wanna talk about atoms , death , magic , intellect , the meaning of life , the size of your feet , are they clean , how much do you charge for

queenofclassandsassxo

I don’t like small talk either, or immaturity and lack of emotional intimacy

thebootydiaries

did you ….. read .. the post …..

dungeondaddy69

Small talk is dumb, let’s drink in silence and leave the universe to our intoxicated selves

thebootydiaries

please read my post please

theartofanimation

Elioli - http://elioli.deviantart.com - https://www.instagram.com/elioliart - http://www.cartoonbrew.com/artist-of-the-day/elena-olivia-ceballos-92082.html - http://elioliart.bigcartel.com - https://www.artstation.com/artist/elioli - https://www.linkedin.com/in/elena-and-olivia-ceballos-55615a46 - https://www.inprnt.com/gallery/elioli - https://www.facebook.com/pages/Elioli-Art/141328246017855?ref=hl - https://twitter.com/search?q=Elioli - https://www.youtube.com/user/AnimatedELIOLI

nealashitposts

I recently found out why my mom would never sleep around me when I was a kid. Like she’d never let herself take naps or sleep if I was awake, ever. Or if she did, she would lock her bedroom door. So when I was 6, I was asleep in my bed in the middle of the night when I hear a loud bang, like a pot being dropped and come out to the living room to see my mom standing by the window, with just a huge pile of spaghetti all over the sill, and a pot on the ground, and I ’m like “Are you gonna eat all that?” And ya’ll she get’s BIG MAD and yells at me and chases me to my room but then a little while later a bunch of cops show up and ask me a bunch of random ass questions about my art? Like this one cop lady keeps asking me to draw dragons for her?! And they seem mad as hell

I didn’t want to get arrested so I just never asked my mom for spaghettis after that. Lesson, learned. Don’t ask mom for spaghettis or she’ll call the damn police on you.

So I have this memory in my head, and it goes unquestioned until I say it outload for the first time a few months back and as soon as I say the words “When I was six, my mom called the cops on me for asking for spaghettis” My adult logic slams into place and is like “Hang on. Your mother definatly did not call the police on a 6 year old for asking for spaghetti.”

So obviously that’s not what really went down. I call up my mom to tell her how I remember it and on top of her figuring out why her kid has always been really cagey around spaghettis for the last 3 decades she tells me what really happened.

So on that night, a man tried to break into our house through the front window. It was just my mom, and her kids so she did what she felt she had too and shot him in the head. He’d been wearing a helmet, which landed on the floor under the window.

Now I just want ya’ll to put yourselves in my moms shoes for a minute here. This woman has just taken a human life. The trauma of that- the instant agony, the panic, the guilt, the fear- all of it hitting her at once, her only solace the knowledge that her children are safe. She protected her daughters. No matter the cost to her soul- her children are safe.

Then she looks up and sees her six year old staring at the inside of this mans head before saying “Are you gonna eat all that?”

thedorkdionysia

plaguedocboi

Mad scientists are great and I adore the lab aesthetic but where is the love for unhinged field work scientists. You drive down a backroad in the middle of the night and your headlights illuminate someone crouched down in the woods completely covered in mud holding five toads in a net. You’re hiking in the remote mountains and there’s some guy perched on a cliff that should be impossible to get to ranting about rocks, they’re gone when you glance back. You’re hanging out by the river one day and see a fully clothed person walk out of the water like Godzilla and they immediately start recording something on a clipboard while muttering to themselves about salamander populations. Feral Science. Degree in being a cryptid

sixlegnag

None of that is unhinged field science though? That's just normal field research.

m-ushroomtale

fish in a wooden box (bilibili)

dontlose-urgay

GIRLFRIENDS 👏🏻 DOING 👏🏻 EACH OTHER’S 👏🏻 MAKEUP

Lumity by @ScribblnTaylor on Twitter

Bubbline by @slowopoke

Catradora by @ladybug-picnic

Korrasami by @iah_fy on Twitter

mrspider-deactivated20221213

I don't punch bugs but my boyfriend is 6'7" and 220lbs so I'll call him to get the bugs and he walks in and does his best new york gangster voice (he's British) and goes "is that guy bothering you, toots?" and then puts them in a cup

if men arent like this theyre worthless

darksonatas

“i want hunter x hunter to come off hiatus”. well i want an end to global warmning 😑

badtzbot

well i want the yoi movie

darksonatas

how will they be able to skate when all the ice is gone

apas-95

So, once again, ‘Musk Personally Being A Fucking Dipshit and Investing In Fantasy Tech’ was a marketing cover for much more sinister, down-to-earth economic maneuvering:

https://jacobinmag.com/2020/01/elon-musk-climate-apocalypse-tesla-spacex

Keep reading

byjove

my cat can instinctively tell when I’m upset about something and she will come in and bite my toes to make me feel worse 🥺 what a little empath

byjove

she’s like “oh I’ll give you something to cry about” 😈 *chomp*

byjove

don’t make excuses for her

she just thrives on chaos and suffering

byjove

violetsandshrikes

Okay I hate retail but shoutout to my boss for not being a giant dick which includes:

• taking us all out for dinner and drinks tonight to thank us for dealing with the first week of December rush

• a guy sexually harassed me at work and I laughed it off but the boss had him banned from the entire mall premises

• he’s kicked people out permanently for yelling at me and coworkers

• i have a driving lesson in the middle of a shift next week and he’s coming in on his day off to cover it for me

• he buys us coffee from the local cafe every morning bc “how the fuck could we survive customers without it”

like thanks for making retail slightly less shitty bro

violetsandshrikes

• has started hostile warfare with the shop across from us because they’re homophobic to the sweetest barista there who came out as lesbian, so he lets her hang out with us on all her breaks and also hung up pride flags in direct view of them and overall does his best to undermine them in any way possible

freelancerwaddledee

your boss sounds awesome

violetsandshrikes

his name is Luigi which makes this 100% funnier

Look at that speed

Thats a fuckin cartoon character

funnypeopletwitter

This is definitely me

everythingfox

kitty treadmill

strongermonster

my mom, dead in the middle of a conversation, slams on the breaks in the middle of a country road so she can pull over and take a picture of all these cows running for cover from the rain and adsfkjlfkdjg and thi dskfjfgj

strongermonster