[memewhore]

[n0vascotia]

I really don't care if Miley Cyrus smoked a bong. She's 18? She can live her own life...

[maseratus]

[elliespectacular]

Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 2024

[elliespectacular]

gay sex

[kosmogrl]

[myothertardisisonthemun]

[tarbor]

Brown eyes are so iconic and beautiful

[britvnygg]

Green eyes are even more iconic and beautiful.

[movedtoscammer-deactivated20190]

If i met a white person irl I’d beat the shit out of them and mug them just because of this post. Because of you. Maybe even kill them. Because of you. You had to say this and now some random cracker bitch is gonna die. Are you happy? Was it worth it?

[beaft]

face of a man who has known sorrow

[beaft]

had to google this as i wasn't familiar with the name. incredibly specific and accurate reference. please don't compare my cat-in-law to a homestuck character again

[miraclemaya]

this is problematic of me (joke) but i really enjoy the splashing of french into english speech or writing. just adds a pizzazz

[witchofanguish]

*adds a certain je ne sais quoi

[miraclemaya]

see the problem is that despite around 8 years of french schooling the french language has utterly escaped my brain so even the most obvious set up i had created for myself by accident was missed by me. such is life.

[spaghettioverdose-deactivated20]

*c'est la vie

[miraclemaya]

god damn it

[teathattast]

[legend-tripper]

[t00thpasteface]

literally no better feeling than blurting out some loud dumbass joke with your buddies and hearing a total stranger ugly-snort-laugh as they walk past bc their own laughter caught them by surprise. find joy and connection in the spontaneity of strangers you son of a bitch. i fucking got your ass

[cipheramnesia]

This is what it's like when I say the dumbest things imaginable to my wife or partner in the checkout lines to see if the cashier will crack a smile. A little human connection between the drudgery.

[flarenoveau]

A few years ago when my little sister was maybe ten or so we went to this like, novelty/antiques store which had an impressive amount of really bad taxidermy. We were sort of doing our own things and I was across the room from her so when she spots this horrible fish she has to run over and yell “ come see the ugliest taxidermied old fish I’ve ever seen “ at me. Without even thinking I just said “you’re the ugliest taxidermied old fish I’ve ever seen.” Which got a snort from an old man across the room. Anyways a few minutes later my stepmom came in and my sister said the same thing to her, and without missing a beat my stepmom deadpans “your father’s the ugliest taxidermied old fish I’ve ever seen”. The old guy absolutely LOST it

[guooey]

Love him... love mr. cool...

[existential-dread-in-the-am]

So deer have this instinct to stand tall and walk like a king when they notice something (a predator) watching them so they look like strong opponents since predators usually target the weakest members of the herd. The baby is doing the Don't Eat Me Walk.

[despicableplankton]

Predators: “How could I possibly eat someone THAT cool??”

[funhomes]

i’m home sick with the flu and i just received this email from my father

[funhomes]

still getting notifications from this post 12 years later…… will i ever be free…..

[mozziac]

Thank you tumblr for 2012 posts.

[mustelidgay]

Every single time someone is like "wait can i say something insane" my ears perk up like a dog

[mustelidgay]

[beemovieerotica]

hate it when pets learn words, my dog flips out when he hears "greenie" so we had to start saying "G word" but now he knows G word so we have to say shit like "are we out of emerald indulgences"

[disgustinggf]

[son-of-drogo]

-Bilbo Baggins at his 111th birthday party.

[kidhoof]

[skygenders]

That’s not how slurs work but not like genocide supporters give a shit.

[curseds-spamblog]

mind you this decision comes 2 days after a prominent Iranian gaming streamer found out he was demonetized for using the "Iran" tag and lost all his revenue for the past month. people are reporting that the Venezuela and Ecuador tags have also resulted in withheld ad revenue. and make no mistake, this is entirely thanks to racist freaks like destiny and h3h3 making a hijabi woman the poster child for their hate campaign.

[sevarate]

[mcdonalds-free-wifi]

me in the nursing home on my 2 hours of awake time