bits and pieces

rien's escapism 21•intj too scared to start posting so I'll just be reblogging🫠

[imactuallyagiraffe]

hey don’t cry. trees grow out of the ground.

[imactuallyagiraffe]

the night sky has sparkles on it

[imactuallyagiraffe]

the creatures live in the grass.

[toastyglow]

remember. you can't know things you don't know. you have to find them out. by doing things.

[fishparasite]

you will live and you will say the wrong things and make mistakes and people will love you anyways.

[fishparasite]

i made this post because i've got so many friends that think saying something wrong in a conversation is the end of the world. it isn't. you'll be okay. you don't have to be embarrassed about every little thing. you are alive and doing things and speaking to people. you will make mistakes and you will live.

[adviceformefromme]

Imagine all the time you wasted overthinking, daydreaming, fantasising about the last guy, the guy before, the guy before that… And where did it land you? Disappointed? Resenting? Grieving, what could have been?….Because you used your precious energy to create a parallel fantasy life of you and him. Your maladaptive day dreaming, which probably started as a trauma response in childhood is quite likely ruining your dating life and here’s why. 

You can’t control the actions of others, in fact you have very little control when it comes to dating, it’s often divine timing, energy compatibility, and a huge part is surrendering. Letting go of the fantasy so the beauty of the unknown can unfold. Unmet needs play a huge role in this. The need for safety and control when dating often leads to creating a mental picture of what you want the future to look like and taking actions that dictate this. For example, you’ve had cute first date, but on your way home you’re already checking your diary to see what dates you’re free next week, maybe he can take you to the theatre on Thursday to see that new show, or maybe you can move your dinner with the girls on Saturday night so you can spend the weekend with him…MEANWHILE he hasn’t even asked you on a second date. All this overthinking and trying to control the future puts you in your masculine energy. Not only is this repelling to a masculine man, but also removes the opportunity to see how things will unfold naturally. So am I saying don’t think about the future with a man? Don’t have hopes and desires? Absolutely not. What I’m saying is when you spend your time away from him overthinking your future with him, imaging conversations in the shower, texting him from a place of trying to control the future - you’re setting yourself up for a fall. You’re wasting your precious energy on overthinking him when that same energy could be spent on you. You’re creating energetic friction between your desires and reality which will show up in how you are with him. You’ll become disappointed he didn’t take you to the theatre on Thursday because he has football, even though that was never the plan. You’re perpetually setting yourself up for disappointment. So here’s the hot take - you want something to control, to obsess over, to love, to cherish, to have and hold forever. Let. That. Be. You. Give yourself the love you’re desperately seeking outside of you, pour into you the way you only dream men would. Buy yourself the gifts you want him to buy you, tell yourself the words you can only imagine he would tell you, love on you so hard that when you are dating you become a reflection of love, love shines through your eyes. Not desperation, not control, not seeking, not wanting. But love, because the most beautiful and wholesome love you could ever imagine - starts within.

[fairydrowning]

"Well, let it pass; April is over, April is over. There are all kinds of love in the world, but never the same love twice."

– F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Short Stories

[petaltexturedskies]

Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Insulted and Humiliated

[petaltexturedskies]

Henry Miller in a letter to Anaïs Nin written c. September 1942, from a Literate Passion: Letters of Anaïs Nin and Henry Miller, 1932-53

[tear-dropp-deactivated20241031]

don’t forget the life you promised yourself

[happyheidi]

a little bunny looking at the stars in case you're having a bad day.

　　 　　˚ 　　　 . ✧

✧. ★ ˚

★ ☄︎

˚ ✧ ˚　

*. ⋆

༘ * 🔭🐇

[weltenwellen]

Susan Sontag, As Consciousness Is Harnessed to Flesh

[petaltexturedskies]

Please, in all this muddle of life, continue to be a bright and constant star. Just a few things remain as beacons: poetry, and you, and solitude.

Vita Sackville-West, from a letter to Virginia Woolf written c. January 1926

[metaphorformetaphor]

“Each year is like putting a new coat over all the old ones. Sometimes I reach into the pockets of my childhood and pull things out.”

— Simon Van Booy, from “Little Birds,” The Secret Lives of People in Love (Turtle Point Press, 2007)

[artemisiasea]

When Toni Morrison said the grandeur of life is the attempt, not the solution… And how she went on to explain that it’s about behaving as beautifully as one can under completely impossible circumstances. The power that has, you know? It’s really just the making room for what breathes in the presence of the attempt. In the coming-to-be. 

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2023??

Cooking with flavor bootcamp (used what I learned in this a LOT this year)

Beekeeping 101

Learn Interior Design from the British Academy of Interior Design (free to audit course - just choose the free option when you register)

Video on learning to read music that actually helped me??

How to use and sew with a sewing machine

How to ride a bike (listen. some of us never learned, and that's okay.)

How to cornrow-braid hair (I have it on good authority that this video is a godsend for doing your baby niece's black hair)

Making mead at home (I actually did this last summer and it was SO good)

How to garden

Basics of snowboarding (proceed with caution)

How to draw for people who (think they) suck at art (I know this website looks like a 2003 monstrosity, but the tutorials are excellent)

Pixel art for beginners so you can make the next great indie game

Go (back) to school

Introduction to Astronomy (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Principals of Economics (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Introduction to philosophy (free college course)

Computer science basics (full-semester Harvard course free online)

Learn a language

Japanese for Dummies (link fix from 2022)

Ukrainian

Portuguese (Brazil)

American Sign Language (as somebody who works with Deaf people professionally, I also strongly advise you to read up on Deaf/HoH culture and history!)

Chinese (Mandarin, Simplified)

Quenya (LOTR fantasy elf language)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2024??

Beginner-oriented video on how to sail

This guy has so many videos on baking different types of bread. SO very many.

Coding in Python - one of the most flexible and adaptable high-level programming languages out there - explained through projects making video games

Learn to swim! (for adult learners. I don’t care if you live in Kansas or Mali or wherever. LEARN TO SWIM.)

Learn how quantum mechanics works. Then read some more about it

[Learn about quantum mechanics again, but in a more advanced engineering/mathematics class. Then read more about the math and physics of it]

Poetry Handbook, by Mary Oliver

Something I learned this year: how to sew a quilt (Here’s a very easy beginning pattern that looks amazing and can be done with pre-cut fabric!)

How to hit the ball in softball

Tutorial video on what is under the hood of most (gas) cars + weird engine sounds and what they mean

Full beginner mechanics technical training, if you want to go more in depth

Playlist on how car engine physics work if you want to go ultra in depth

Lecture series on architecture design through study of buildings

How (American income) taxes & tax law work (choose “audit course” at checkout for free class)

Pickleball for beginners (so you can finally join your neighbor/friend/distant cousin who is always insisting you join their team)

+ Para-Pickleball for beginners (for mobility aid users!)

School is so much more fun when there’s no tests:

American Law - Contracts

Shakespeare’s Life and Plays

Fairy Tales: Meanings, Messages, and Morals

Modern Poetry

World History [Part 1, Part 2]

Learn a language:

Arabic + Resource Guide compiled from Reddit (includes info on different dialects)

Chinese (Cantonese) (audio)

Urdu (frequently recommended course on Reddit) + Resource Guide

Yucatec Maya

[chandra-telescope]

hope is a skill

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

hope is a weapon you are trained to wield

[chandra-telescope]

favourite additions

[chandra-telescope]

[glowcowboy]

i’m in a good place (my room) but i’m also not in a good place (deep physical and psychological suffering)

[lifeafterpsychiatry]

Dealing With Executive Dysfunction - A Masterpost

The “getting it done in an unconventional way” method.

The “it’s not cheating to do it the easy way” method.

The “fuck what you’re supposed to do” method.

The “get stuff done while you wait” method.

The “you don’t have to do everything at once” method.

The “it doesn’t have to be permanent to be helpful” method.

The “break the task into smaller steps” method.

The “treat yourself like a pet” method.

The “it doesn’t have to be all or nothing” method.

The “put on a persona” method.

The “act like you’re filming a tutorial” method.

The “you don’t have to do it perfectly” method.

The “wait for a trigger” method.

The “do it for your future self” method.

The “might as well” method.

The “when self discipline doesn’t cut it” method.

The “taking care of yourself to take care of your pet” method.

The “make it easy” method.

The “junebugging” method.

The “just show up” method.

The “accept when you need help” method.

The “make it into a game” method.

The “everything worth doing is worth doing poorly” method.

The “trick yourself” method.

The “break it into even smaller steps” method.

The “let go of should” method.

The “your body is an animal you have to take care of” method.

The “fork theory” method.

The “effectivity over aesthetics” method.