PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
izzy's playlists!
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@offtothetardis
one time a guy i know whose girlfriend was heavily pregnant didn’t tweet anything for a whole day so i texted him ‘congrats on your baby’ and made him think i had some kind of baby precognition
like six months after that just after halloween i asked to see his son dressed as a ‘fat baby pumpkin’ and he was like ‘who told you’ and i said ‘no one. it’s halloween. you have a fat baby. he’s going to be a pumpkin’
bbc sherlock wants what i have
The guy On the right is MY UNCLE WHAT IN THE FUCK HAHAHAHAH
An update. He thinks he’s very funny
a man in a gray beard writing “x3″
The beekeeper forgot to insert the frames in the hive in which the bees collect the honey. The hardworking insects then built their own architecture from the honeycomb so that the air can flow freely and maintain a stable temperature.
Creative gardening group post
the origin of the letter 🇦
(from the documentary The Odyssey of the Writing, 2020)
Documentary is called “The Secret History of Writing” done by BBC
https://youtu.be/hbmyXjqXlEY
this has always fascinated me. I first learned it about 25 years ago, and ever since, every time I see a capital letter A a tiny voice inside me goes “bull!”
Fun to see an actual scholarly version of this, because I first read it as explained (-ish) by one of Kipling’s “Just So Stories” a very, very long time ago…
I HATE THE ONION
#this is what you all sound like talking about succession
Playing anything after playing assassin’s creed for a month: why the fUCK can’t I climb this
assassin’s creed was the first video game I ever played, and I finished the first game in a weekend more or less without pause. then I went to work on Monday and, being totally unfamiliar with the Tetris effect, was extremely taken aback by the immediate impulse to reach my teller station by vaulting over the counter. I mean, I didn’t even question it at first. I made it maybe two long purposeful steps forward before my brain caught up and I spent the rest of the day doubting my own actions.
i was in the grocery store and saw an onion on the ground and picked it up, absently saying “poor little guy.” behind me a teenage girl started laughing and then stopped and went “aww. i’m sorry for laughing. that’s nice actually.” and the cycle of cruelty is broken for another generation as a young person realizes that it is not embarrassing to have empathy for another thing that was once living, because certainly to be a lone white onion rolling on the ground in a supermarket would be terrifying to anyone
I hope there’s an afterlife so that whoever made this pot 2,000 years ago can brag that their cookware is so good it’s still usable literally millennia later. Something about this object being lost for centuries and then rediscovered, and being put (successfully) to its original purpose again is so pleasing to me.
Some Uzbek digging a canal: “Oh fuck yes a free pot. This rules.”
"Do you ever dream of land?" The whale asks the tuna.
"No." Says the tuna, "Do you?"
"I have never seen it." Says the whale, "but deep in my body, I remember it."
"Why do you care," says the tuna, "if you will never see it."
"There are bones in my body built to walk through the forests and the mountains." Says the whale.
"They will disappear." Says the tuna, "one day, your body will forget the forests and the mountains."
"Maybe I don't want to forget," Says the whale, "The forests were once my home."
"I have seen the forests." Whispers the salmon, almost to itself.
"Tell me what you have seen," says the whale.
"The forests spawned me." Says the salmon. "They sent me to the ocean to grow. When I am fat with the bounty of the ocean, I will bring it home."
"Why would the forests seek the bounty of the oceans?" Asks the whale. "They have bounty of their own."
"You forget," says the salmon, "That the oceans were once their home."
CM Director: This is a serious scene, okay? Be professional.
MGG: 😛
One of the most important things I have learned today..
nobody bitch about the tumblr checkmark this is the funniest shit staff has pulled in months and its absolutely contributing to the landlord-firing-gunshots-at-passing-cars vibe of the past week
[ID: youtube comment from Hal Sawyer:
My favorite relic English still used everywhere is the word "the" used in phrases like: "the more I look at this, the stranger it seems, or "the bigger they come, the harder they fall". This "the" is not the article of any noun, it is a different word, a conjunction descended from the old English "þā", pronounced "tha" which means either "when" or "then". Back in early Middle English the structure "if - then" had not taken over and if you wanted to express an if - then relationship you said "þā whatever, þā whatever", meaning "when such-and- such, then such-and-such". "þā" sounds almost the same as "the" and the spelling of the two converged, but the meaning remained totally different. "the more, the merrier" literally means "when more, then merrier" or "if more, then merrier'; same as centuries ago.
end ID]
this is so cool
now with added wiktionary link
update: please reblog this reblog which has a correction to this, it's from þȳ not þā and is a different grammatical form, more like "this much x means this much y"
there is something so darkly comical about tumblr potentially outliving twitter
tumblr, which is held together with duct tape and madness, run by three raccoons in blood stained Yahoo! hats and a handful of crabs, its only discernible source of income the sale of shoelaces from an inside joke so inside no one knows the original source anymore and fake blue checkmarks... that website still lives on
truly the cockroach of social media and I love it for that
scrolling twitter today and then coming over here is like walking out of a burning building and then walking into the calm remains of a building that burnt down 5 years ago and has been reclaimed by nature.
repeat after me: i will not be marketable i will NOT be marketable I will not be marketable i WILL not be marketable i will not be MAR KE TA BLE!!!
