u want... sum skk?

[Hiatus] Hello, I'm Chelle~ | She/They | Spanish/English | Bungou Stray Dogs / Genshin Impact / Mystic Messenger | Chuuya's Hips Club | Soukoku Hell ♡

[piosplayhouse]

on loving too much.

[uwibbit]

funky lil xianxian playing his funky lil tunes for his funky lil friends 🐇🎶

[fawfulydoo]

reblog to give the person you reblogged it from a little heart lollipop

[meangirlnurse]

anyone else remember being a child and seeing the very neat handwriting of other little girls and somehow knowing that you were a different genre of person than they were

[lunarconception-deactivated2021]

literally no…i remember seeing bad handwriting & thinking “oh these other kids must be orphans or something”

[meangirlnurse]

fascinating to hear from the other genre, thanks for your contribution

[fozmeadows]

dear white male writers: DO NOT DO THIS

These horrific, sexist, racist paragraphs - screenshotted and shared for posterity by James Smythe, to whom we are all indebted - are the work of one Liam O’Flynn, a writer and English teacher. Evidently, they come from his book Writing With Stardust: the Ultimate Descriptive Guide for students, parents, teachers, and lovers of English, and are intended as examples of good writing.

UM.

Dear white male writers: DO NOT DO THIS SHIT. IT IS SUPER GROSS AND FETISHISTIC AND ALSO TERRIBLE WRITING. THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS. 

Like I just. “Her virility-brown eyes -” WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN? How can you have an “Amazonian figure” ON a “wafer-thin body” when “figure” is a word that describe’s a body’s shape, and Amazonian means pretty much the DIRECT FUCKING OPPOSITE of “wafer-thin” in the first place?  What the shitting fuck does ANY of this mean, apart from “I am only nebulously familiar with the concept of women and completely at a loss if I can’t compare their various bodyparts to jewels, animals and footstuffs”?

STOP 

GO TO WRITING JAIL

GO DIRECTLY TO WRITING JAIL, DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT $200

[the-thorster]

tag yourself i’m the two beryl-green jewels in the snow

[count-di-luna]

if her ears frame her nose do they like, grow directly beside her nose? how does she see from them? 

*facepalm*

[captainlordauditor]

“ Writing With Stardust: the Ultimate Descriptive Guide for students, parents, teachers, and lovers of English “

lovers of english

oh my goddddddd

[captainlordauditor]

i can’t get over this fucking post

“I loved her nebulous, eden-green eyes which were a-sparkle with the ‘joie de vivre’. They were like two beryl-green jewels melted onto snow.”

1. what the fuck is joie de vivre

2. melted jewels?

3. beryl green

eden green:

WHICH ONE IS ITTTTTTTTT

[thatgirlonstage]

@laughlikesomethingbroken “Joie de vivre” is a French phrase that literally translates to “joy of living”, while it IS one of those phrases that gets used in English in this context it is SO EXTRA AND UNNECESSARY OH MY GOD. Don’t use French to make yourself sound sophisticated when you’re NOT I don’t know where to even START. Curvilinear waist? Sugar candy-sweet? What the FUCK are seraph’s ears? Voguish clothes? What the everloving fuck is “constellation blue” supposed to mean??? Like forget the objectification, this writing is horrifying enough before we even get to the embedded sexism

[captainlordauditor]

seraph’s ears are ears that you can’t see bc they’re hidden behind her 6 wings

[geekandmisandry]

Oyster white teeth?

[catsfeminismandatla]

holy purple prose batman

[emeraldmercury]

Female writers do this too. Have you read a Mills and Boon novel? Have you read high school girls’ yaoi fanfics?

[geekandmisandry]

Uh oh, we were focusing too much on how a grown man is selling this shit and not enough shitting on teenage girls. Egalitarians here to put an end to that shit.

[dizzy-redhead]

Guess what? I’ve read A LOT of Harlequin novels and a LOT of fanfic and I have never ever seen anything this horrible at description.

Also, none of those stories were trying to hold themselves up as high examples of the craft

[typhoidmeri]

[123-its-just-me]

You guys here is the description of the book on Amazon.

If this is the description I cannot think how bad the inside is.

[rookerstash-after-dark]

I never ever want to hear anyone make fun of fanfic writers again

NEVER EVER

[write-like-an-american]

Lord god almighty. I’ve been feeling really down about my writing lately, but this is a confidence boost. 8I

[thelittleblackfox]

“single but in a long term relationship”

[i-gwarth]

3.6/5 is entirely too high a Goodreads score for this book

[amaryllis-meridian]

… that second one is describing a dog.

[elennare]

As well as the sexism, racism, purple prose, and general nonsense… “The moons delicate light”? At least learn to use apostrophes correctly before setting yourself up as a writing expert, good lord.

[ammg-old]

“You will find that this book will transform the way you think about descriptive writing.”

Well it sure did that…

[elodieunderglass]

Gosh

[heywriters]

If he has the confidence to sell and teach this stuff, you deserve to sell yours too!

[anastasian-dreamer]

I have a few things to say here:

This entire post was a trip.

That last comment is more inspirational than it should be.

What the actual fuck?

[thegreymoon]

OMFG, I thought that was a PARODY 😖😫😭

[theflurtifly]

I need to show this to my english prof, he’s gonna have a heart attack

[ohshc-trash-14]

Hey to all the writers out there who think they’re being overly descriptive because of those dumb posts about what not to do in writing- 

No one can be as bad as this guy. You’re probably fine.

[ajleanon5]

@shippingallthelegos this is a fucking trip

[i-am-fluffs-deactivated20211114]

@writing-in-the-grave have you seen this?

[writing-in-the-grave]

I think I’ve just discovered a new level of headache.

[joehillneverdied]

Maybe words were a mistake.

[writing-in-the-grave]

I think ur right.

[drifthail]

I suddenly feel better about my writing.

[drifthail]

I FOUND THE POST!!!!!!

i’m gonna put this in my writing reference tag to show what to avoid when writing

[drifthail]

I’m re reblogging because it says he’s an english teacher

What school would allow students to be taught how to write like this?????

I think this post is why I’m really bad at writing descriptions. (I don’t want to write descriptions they way he does…)

[ultimatebottom69]

WoW … WoW … WoW … What the fuck am I reading and did this bitch actually put French in his damn paragraph out of context just to sounds sophisticated ? Like … You want a croissant for that ? Mec Vraiment . Va te faire FOUTRE . Non . Mais . Oh . Tu vas traumatiser les gens avec ta connerie . Comme tu m’as traumatisée moi d’ailleurs .

[ink-poisoning]

i feel so much better about my own writing now. it’s hard for me to be insecure about using too many compound sentences in a row when this garbage exists….

[night-dragon937]

i’ve been procrastinating english creative writing homework but i literally cannot do worse than that, so here i go

[shadowylemon]

@worstloki @stellophia

[worstloki]

[spideyspeaches]

It’s safe to say that cis white men who write women that way are sexist pigs and should never write in their entire life, should probably be put into jail for objectification and stabbed with the knife Brutus used on Ceaser.

To the fanfic writers doubting yourselves:

[artpikuuhnah]

Dazai helping his juniors beat the Hardest Level in Super Mario Land, 2012.

[yibo-wang]

wangxian + some of my favourite terms of endearment in urdu

[hjarta-deactivated20260124]

just learned that magnolias are so old that they’re pollinated by beetles because they existed before bees

[scienceoftheidiot]

They existed *before beetles*

[somethingaboutsomethingelse]

[spacedandelions]

Why is this sad? Why am I sad?

[ignescent]

https://xkcd.com/1259/

Bee Orchid

[sepdet]

This is how I feel about Joshua Trees. They and avocado trees produce fruit meant to be eaten and dispersed by giant ground sloths. Without them, the Joshua Trees' range has shrunk by 90%.

(my own photos)

Not only they, but the entire Mojave ecosystem is still struggling to adapt since the loss of ground sloth dung. their chief fertilizer.

Many, many trees and plants in the Americas have widely-spaced, extremely long thorns that do nothing to discourage deer eating their leaves, but would've penetrated the fur of ground sloths and mammoths. Likewise, if you've observed a tree that drops baseball or softball-sized fruit which lies on the ground and rots, like Osage Oranges, which were great for playing catch at my school, chances are they were ground sloth or mammoth chow.

You can read about various orphaned plants and trees missing their megafauna in this poignant post:

The Trees That Miss The Mammoths - American Forests

Trees that once depended on animals like the wooly mammoth for survival have managed to adapt and survive in the modern world.



[thebestoftumbling]

[keysmash-warrior-deactivated202]

NooOOO

[samojon]

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

[altamont498]

Those appear to be bird tracks rather than bunny tracks! Ergo, it was a bird hopping and then taking off, not a bunny getting taken away!

[danceintheskies]

oh my god thank you phoenix wright

[dinnermess-deactivated20200529]

yeah those aren’t bunny tracks.

[saffarren]

Forgive my sceptism, but why would a bird with a supposedly wide wingspan hop around in the snow in the first place when tree branches would suffice in the beginning?

Feel free to explain that.

[tinysaurus-rex-deactivated20240]

I’ll be real I don’t know much about Phoenix Wright. But! I do know a lot about birds.

The mighty ptarmagin! Practically a feathered rabbit, these magnificent creatures are built for the snow.

Look at those boots! Wonderfully feathered. They spend most of their time as little snow lumps.

In fact, they’re very well known for the above phenomenon.

These ptarmagin trails are a pretty common sight!

[valiantlyrainybouquet]

Reblog for the little snow lumps ✨

[baishujinkou]

[aledachanart]

Quise rehacer un dibujo del año pasado para ver mi avance ^^. 2021/2020 / el último es del 2017 o 2016 ya ni me acuerdo XD. #medibang #dazaiosamu #darkage #bungoustraydogs #dazai #portmafia #fanart #myartchallenge #myartstyle🎨 https://www.instagram.com/p/CXF1olzM0Zd/?utm_medium=tumblr

[uwibbit]

chibi comms from earlier this year!

[gummymela]

as one with wind and cloud

[dontletthisheartgo]

“Fuck school”, I say as I do all my homework and aim for A’s

[samijen]

TartaLiWeekRound2

Day 7: Pocky Day ♥️ Happy 11.11 day!!

[Do not repost // twit: @sami_jen // ig: @samijen]

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

[ID: Screenshot of tumblr tags reading “please op i am desperate for the context.” End ID.]

Sure, here ya go:

Lord George Gordon Byron was an English poet in the early 1800s.

He wrote several narrative poems that influenced the gothic genre and was a HUGE fucking slut. HUGE. This bisexual mess slept with so many fucking people it was insane, no gender was safe. Unfortunately that “no one was safe” mentality did not work out well for him bc there were a LOT of rumors that he impregnated his half-sister.

His only child from a legitimate marriage was from his wife, Lady Anne Isabella Noel Byron, who straight-up left him after a year. You know how divorce was uncommon in the 1800s? His wife was just so fed up with him that she did not care and left when her daughter was five weeks old.

This daughter was named Ada and would become known as Ada Lovelace.

Byron signed the separation papers and then left the country to have sex elsewhere and would later die when Ada was eight.

During that time if a couple divorced, usually the Dad would get full custody, so just in case he tried anything Lady Byron made sure to play the devoted and overattentive mother.

Lady Byron was absolutely paranoid that her daughter would become an insane gothic mess like her dad so she decided the only thing to do would be to make sure she did not become a Poet™. So she heavily encouraged Ada’s interests in science and mathematics.

Around the 1830-40s, Ada met Charles Babbage through a mutual friend and he showed her his prototype for a mechanical calculator. She got absolutely obsessed with this machine and began helping him out with it to the point where her notes on it became more extensive than his.

She also added notes to a translation of a paper on this engine that is considered to be the first published algorithm.

These notes on the engine and translation became the basis for computer programming.

She’s considered The First Computer Programmer™

So, because Lord Byron was a little slut and his wife wanted their daughter to Not Be, we now have to deal with tumblr discourse. Thank you and goodnight.

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

categorizing the three types of responses i’m getting on my this post

3. clowning on lord byron

[ID: tags from tumblr user @onomatopisha that read “tumblr should exist by the grace of one intensely slutty bisexual man tbh” End ID.]

2. people who knew about byron and lovelace separately but had no idea they were related

[ID: tags from tumblr user @thesillyverses that read “ADA IS THAT SLUT’S DAUGHTER???? queen…. you had it so much harder than i imagined” End ID.]

1. whatever the hell this means

[ID: tags from tumblr user @trpicaaughh that read “surprise tool that’ll help me later” End ID.]

[deadmitochondria]

Me and the bois acting surprised when we fail in a test we did not study for

[vilf-deactivated20210205]

men who are detectives be like “he’s my partner” ….. ok you gay bitch 🤨