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macklin celebrini has autism
we're not kids anymore.
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Today's Document
trying on a metaphor

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@oneiric-bumblebees
character inspired by clouds!
INDOCTRINATION IS CHILD ABUSE
MORE SOUP FROM THE BOG
Ugh so cute
system accountability and collective responsibility are extremely important and necessary to exercise, full stop. if another alter does something harmful you can't act like you're not responsible for the consequences, no matter what your role is, whether you're the host, etc. don't sweep their actions under the rug, quit being a coward and own up to your systems actions.
There are steps you can take to help a troubled alter who is behaving in damaging ways. There are steps you can take even when you feel out of control. There are steps you can take to start working together as a system, and system self-accountability and accepting responsibility for your systems actions is the start of it.
This is for the systems whose trauma isn't often talked about.
Systems whose trauma stems from growing up neurodiverse in a neurotypical world.
Systems whose trauma stems from purely emotional abuse.
Systems who weren't abused, but whose trauma stems from experiencing disorganized attachment as a child.
Systems who weren't abused, but whose trauma stems from growing up in poverty.
Systems whose trauma stems from natural disasters, or warzones.
Systems whose trauma stems from school.
Systems whose trauma stems from illness and/or disability.
Systems whose trauma stems from emotional neglect (which, by the way, is abuse!).
Systems whose trauma stems from anything that isn't normally talked about online or in trauma-recovery spaces, whether it's on this list or not. Your system is still valid, your trauma is still real. You are not faking, and you are not alone.
Kid talks to the TV when he's watching X-Men. It's so cute.
When I was a (unmedicated, undiagnosed ADHD) kid, like, under 12, my room was a mess all the time. Not shocking.
I struggled keeping it clean.
I struggled getting it clean.
I would sincerely put in quite a bit of effort and be really proud of the progress I made. Then one of my parents would come check and see how I was doing.
"Well, you've still got a long way to go."
That sentence. I was like, 11 when my parents were saying that to me. It was crushing. All my pride and satisfaction with my work was completely gone. All my effort was worthless to them. All they saw what everything I didn't do.
At the age of ELEVEN, I knew that wasn't right. That wasn't fair. I swore to myself I would never invalidate someone's work like that.
Now, at 30, I catch myself thinking 'I cleaned up, but my apartment is still so messy.' and I flashback to standing in my bedroom as a child, hearing those fucking words from my parents.
'No. I wouldn't invalidate someone else's work. I'm not going to invalidate my own. I did good. I made progress.' and I'll list the things that I DID get done to myself.
You deserve credit for all the progress you make.
You deserve credit for all the work you do.
It doesn't matter how much work you have left.
What you accomplish, no matter how small, counts. Even when what you accomplished was taking a day to rest and recharge and give yourself a break.
Never let anyone invalidate your work. Not even you.
People who act aggressive and negative as fuck and then when you’re like “hey can you stop” they’re like “I’m going through some stuff 🥺🥺🥺” like damn dude that’s crazy me too - for example right now I’m going through YOUR behavior.
“I’m dealing with a lot 🥺🥺🥺” and I’m dealing with you so I guess we’re even
If your reactions to your trauma or your problems are making other people around you feel unsafe you need new coping mechanisms.
i was so angry at everything when i was 15. and i was right
stars and water are perfect together ✨🌊
‘The Rainbow Book of American Folk Tales and Legends ‘
illustration by Marc Simont (1958)
Great eared nightjar
this is a dragon
How is it possible for an animal to resemble a bird, a mammal, and a reptile simultaneously?
Those ARE great ears.
So much of what is considered a “sin” by Christianity is just….being a human being? Our inherent human nature is pathologized to the point where it becomes insufferable to live because you’re constantly aware of how “sinful” you are.
Oh, you got mad at some asshole? You’ve basically MURDERED him in your heart, you disgusting evil freak. Oh, you think that person is hot? You’ve essentially committed ADULTERY of the heart! Repent, you whore! On and on it goes for small inconsequential and entirely normal parts of the human condition:
Feeling sad? You’re ungrateful.
Lazy? Idle hands are the devil’s playthings.
Forgot to pray this morning? HOW COULD YOU BETRAY THE ONE WHO DIED ON THE CROSS FOR YOU??? How could you think so little of Him???1!11
Disappointed? Your faith is pathetic.
And everything good you’ve ever done, said, or accomplished is all due to God because you’re a worthless sinner anyway. Everything from a good test score to a friend’s compliment to graduating college or getting a job or avoiding disaster—-it’s all thanks to God that you even have these undeserving things. Nothing good ever comes from your sinful nature.
Is it really any wonder why we have such little self-esteem?
In simple terms, having DID means your brain is hypertuned to adapting to circumstances, and to do that your brain needs to keep separate tabs on all the different parts of your personality. In other words, it's kinda like a snake shedding their skin to grow and adapt, but the skin is now a different, equally-as-alive snake. In OTHER other words, people with DID are worms, but all of the parts of the worm that are cut to become other worms have formed a personally exclusive worm society
Thank you
- OperationDID
So what I’m getting is you are say we are all worms on strings.
I think that is the scientific terminology for what you are trying to say.
If so, I agree
I too am a worm on a string.
-Riku (Host)
We are all a worm on a string but lots of worms on 1 string
Oh okay that makes a lot more sense.
-Riku (Host)
Hi! I've read most of your Spideytorch tag and every post where you've mentioned Homecoming, and I've gotta ask, why do you think Peter Parker should be Jewish? I've seen people claim he comes across that way before because he'd used Yiddish words, but never specifically because of his guilt complex. Like, I'm a Jew (an Israeli one) and I've always thought religious guilt was a Christian thing. And wouldn't making Peter Jewish now retcon the bits where he was protestant?
It’s not that I think Peter should be Jewish so much as that I think the character is Jewish, in that he was conceived specifically as a Jewish character at a time where that couldn’t be addressed on the page, much the same way Ben Grimm was intended by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby to be Jewish. It wasn’t until Fantastic Four v3 #56, in 2002, that Ben was ever declared on-page Jewish, even though it was clear long before this point to anyone with the tools to recognize it. The same is true for Peter Parker – we just haven’t hit our Fantastic Four v3 #56. Andrew Garfield, who is Jewish on his father’s side, notably recognized it and decided to play the character as Jewish, which is a big reason why, to me, this is the only film version of the character that strikes me as an honest representation of Peter Parker.
Look at it this way: even if we leave out the fact that Stan Lee was raised Jewish and any speculation on what personal influences a Jewish man living in New York at that time might have brought when creating a superhero character designed to be easy to relate to, who had problems Just Like You, there’s the location to account for. New York is a heavily Jewish and heavily Jewish-influenced area in general, but Peter’s not just from New York City – he’s from Forest Hills, Queens, a historically Jewish neighborhood. (Since you mentioned my Homecoming posts, I don’t think it’s a coincidence they moved him out of Forest Hills, with the writers citing the area as “too old-fashioned.”) To compare him to Ben Grimm again, Ben also hailed from a famously Jewish neighborhood long before the character was ever addressed as Jewish on page, even though, you know, he obviously was. Ben, like Peter, also has a distinctly New York Jewish speech pattern, albeit a different one from Peter’s, accounting for their differently Jewish backgrounds.
While I would normally personally view the use of Yiddish as something of a grey area – the Marvel universe being centered around New York and populated by characters who commonly have fast-paced, banter-y dialogue style, I would expect most of them to have picked up a phrase or two – but it’s the frequency and the skill with which Peter deploys Yiddish in his snappy, aggressive New York banter, coupled with his place of birth and a thousand other things. If Clint Barton throws around an oy vey or a fakakta, I’m like, yeah, that boy’s watched some Seinfeld, huh. When Peter Parker does it, it feels different to me.
In addition to the Yiddish, 616 Peter also references lesser known Jewish holidays:
How many non-Jewish guys would casually drop Shavuos? Or call it, as an Ashkenazi man from Forest Hills is likely to, Shavuos instead of Shavuot? If Peter isn’t Jewish, then I’d be raising a touchy eyebrow at him so casually throwing around mentions of a faith that isn’t his.
But Brian Michael Bendis wrote this. And Brian Michael Bendis knows Spider-Man is Jewish.
When asked about Peter’s tendency to litter his speech with Yiddish in Spider-Men, Bendis flatly replied “he’s Jewish.” When asked if Peter Parker was Jewish in Ultimate Marvel, he replied that every Peter Parker is Jewish. I’ve spoken before about my own personal issues with taking social media statements from writers in multiple creator, non creator-owned properties as hard canon facts, but Bendis is so incredibly prolific that I have to break my rule a little for him. At the very least, given that he wrote all of Ultimate Spider-Man, I think it must be conceded that Ultimate Peter Parker is Jewish. (Every Peter Parker is Jewish.)
Regarding the concept of guilt, I literally have an e-mail from Chabad labeled “How to Manage Jewish Guilt” sitting in my inbox right now, so this might be an American-Israeli Jewish cultural difference –Jewish guilt is very much considered a thing here. Catholic guilt is a thing too, but it’s a different flavor of guilt. (I’m Jewish on my mother’s side and my father was raised Catholic, plus one of my great aunts is a nun – so I’m pretty familiar with both breeds.) There are a lot of articles online detailing the difference between the feeling, but Peter’s version of guilt imho lines up exactly to Jewish guilt, and not to a Christian form. Jewish guilt is responsibility, even if it’s a whacked out neurotic overblown explosion of it. There’s also a thing I get annoyed with in fandom quite often, which is this very Christian desire to “absolve” Peter of his guilt, this “oh if only he could work through this, he wouldn’t feel so responsible, he’d let other people help,” etc, and like, let’s leave the guilt aside for a moment, but from my own Jewish perspective, that sense of responsibility isn’t something that should be resolved. He should feel responsible. It’s good that he feels responsible. We should all feel responsible. Look at what happens when people don’t. Peter Parker’s ethical code is rooted in Judaism. You don’t get to absolve that.
I’ve mentioned before that one of the things I find interesting about Peter Parker is how for a street level superhero, he’s seriously overpowered. Seriously! He’s super strong! Fast enough to dodge a bullet! He heals much faster than a normal man! He has a freaking danger sense! (As a Jewish person in America, I wish I had a danger sense.) What more can you ask for? You can ask for the one superpower the spider didn’t give him: Peter Parker’s super freaking smart. If there are two Jewish super powers, they’re survival (Spider-Man always gets back up) and intelligence. And it’s not just that Peter’s smart, he strives for education. It’s important to him. (I’m not saying that these things can’t exist and be important to non-Jewish characters, of course, but I am saying there is a cultural slant, especially, again, accounting for where Peter comes from.) There’s so much I keep thinking of tackling here: the secret keeping, his spy parents who were framed as traitors by the Red Skull, the stereotype of the weak Jewish intellectual and Peter’s aggressive defiance of that, coupled with people’s desire to strip that out of the character – all of those things feed into the character’s Jewishness.
As for retconning Peter being protestant – see, the thing is, it doesn’t like, matter. It’s not like retconning the religion of a character like Matt Murdock or Nightcrawler, where an integral piece of the lens through which they view the world would have to be altered. Christianity has never informed Peter’s character in any notable way. Okay, so we see him celebrating Christmas at home with his family – that’s not uncommon in America. My family does that. To label Peter Parker Protestant isn’t to have that religion inform the character, which ideally a religion or lack of one should do; it’s a label put in place to say “see, look, it’s okay, he isn’t Jewish.” Because he is Jewish. Marvel, the company, who is concerned with sales and popularity overall, just doesn’t want to admit it, because they’ve built up this concept of Spider-Man as the most relatable character. And if he is the most relatable character in the world, to the most people in the world, then he can’t be Jewish. (Except that he is.)
It’s not that I would even want Peter to be more religious than he is in canon, which isn’t very. As someone with a complicated relationship with my own spirituality, I don’t mind that he doesn’t seem, as a Jew Marvel won’t admit is a Jew, to be particularly observant. I would like of course to see him in temple for the High Holidays, or simply celebrating Hanukkah with Ben Grimm and Kitty Pryde in a Marvel holiday special, but if he continued on the exact way he was – a guy who talks to and argues with God, a distinctly Jewish trait, and that seems to be the end of the story – I’d be okay with that. I would just like it done with honesty, and bravery, and truthful storytelling.
Bottom line, these days I hear a lot of talk about how Peter as a white male nerd doesn’t resonate with readers anymore because he’s supposed to be the underdog, and nerd culture is no longer synonymous with that. To which I say: Peter Parker never belonged to the nerds. He always belonged to the Jews.
the likelihood that a goy would say “shavuos” instead of “shavuot”, or even talk about shavuot at all, is…very small. op is a fucking genius
There’s a fine line between “pushing yourself out of your comfort zone” and “pushing yourself into a mental breakdown” and we need to fucking find it and stop encouraging people to do the second in an attempt at making them do the first.
A German pedagogue named Tom Senninger developed this model called the “Learning Zone Model.” Senninger talks about three zones: comfort, learning (or growth), and panic. I think that’s really important because some people do talk like anything “outside your comfort zone” is automatically good and brings growth.
But Senninger knows that you can only stretch so far before you’ve stretched too far. Both experience, personal work, and therapy can help expand the first two zones and shrink the third, but we’ll always have that place where panic and/or pain sets in, and our goal should be to recognize and respect that in ourselves and others, rather than force ourselves or someone else to “push through it.” There is no “through it.” The only thing on the other side of the panic zone is more panic.
dare i say that stuffed animals are one of the single greatest inventions of all time and im thankful every day for the fact that someone thought to make animals but in huggable plush form…..saved me from a lot of bad nights and nightmares as a kid, i love you stuffed animals
You may offer your thanks to Magarete Steiff
She lived in Germany and could be considered as the first person to sew stuffed animals merly for children to play with and to counter the common “hard” toys out of wood or metal wich were popular back then.
There is even so much more to the story, because she was as you can see paraliezed from polio, she couldnt walk or use her right arm, she had to fight all her life just to be accpeted as a human being, she wasnt even allowed to sit in the front row of church in her home village and had a pretty abusive mother. One time she and her brother almost drowned but the townpeople only attempted to save her brother because he was healty. Her father saved her from drowning in last minute.
Only her father and brother stood behind her, still she learned to accept her faith and make the best out of it. After a failed operation she said she had gone around living this way anyways. She started to sew, more importantly she started to sew with a sewing machine wich was realy new at this time. People would not buy from her at first but then she made a realy beautyfull dress for her best friend and suddenly everyone was crazy for her work.
Then she started to sew little elephants as pincushions, but when she attempted to sell them around christmas she quickly realized that for one children were crazy for them and wanted them as toys and also. this was what she wanted to do, bringing happiness to kids.
She expanded futher and gave work to over 20 women as sewers in her factory, her brother helped her to do so, and she started producing stuffed animals of all kinds (almost) their trademark was a button sewed into every anmals ear. It still is to this day.
Whit the economy crisis her factory, and she almost lost it, she already couldnt pay her workers, he factory was about to be forceclosed and the last hope was a toy fair they would attend,
and then she had an idea, she sewed a bear, the very first stuffed toy bear there was, with moveable head and limbs and realy soft fur and glass eyes, it was beautyfull, but at the toyfair most people thoght it was to expensive
most people because one american buyer fell in love with the bears, he bought them all and he ordered 3000 more, it saved the factory
you may ask why would anyone need 3000 stuffed toy bears easy, to support and advertise the candidacy of Theodore Roosevelt as the U.S. president, trough that the toy bear invented by Magarete Steiff became well known as the
Teddy Bear
Disability history matters!
The fact that she faced so much ableism and discrimination in her life was indeed sad (and infuriating!) – and that may be the reaction of many abled people when they hear her story (the poor disabled little girl).
But the fact that she survived, and innovated, and brought modern machines to her hometown, and advocated for herself, and brought joy to so many people, in spite of that discrimination (and I do mean “spite”) is not sad at all.
It’s downright victorious!
Sure, and I love that. But the goal for us disabled people shouldn’t be to conquer capitalism, which is a system that explicitly oppresses us, but to live lives we are happy with.
It’s wonderful that she invented teddy bears. As a disabled person, who uses a wheelchair, and makes things including soft toys, that speaks to me.
But she shouldn’t have had to prove her worth as a human being by producing something that was economically profitable.
The story of her life is a story many of us are still living today, in one form or another.