Hypothetically, a blog

Adult

[osmoticradiant]

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[stiffyck]

"aromantic" and "asexual" actually cannot be used interchangeably. just so you guys know. those two are very different and very separate identities. they can go hand in hand but they are not inherently connected and are not the same fucking thing.

if i see one more person saying asexual when they mean AROMANTIC im gonna start killing people i swear to GOD

[lilietsblog]

but also in real life asexual often ends up standing for both (aka for aroace), much the same way "homosexual" often is used inclusively of homoromantic and so on. And if you try to argue that because someone is only ever explicitly described as asexual that means they're probably nor aromantic or else it would be specified. I reserve my right to bite, also.

[stiffyck]

Good additions but I made this post specifically because people keep calling aromantic people asexual.

I've talked to some people, only referred to myself as aromantic, and I still got called asexual.

Aromantic people who are not asexual shouldn't have to constantly remind people they're aromantic, not asexual.

[redstonedust]

when you think about it a rollercoaster is probably safer than a car. i mean you crash any vehicle going over 60mph and youre likely to be gravely injured so id rather be in one thats stuck in a tested loop and not driven by my road-rage prone mother. this is why im about to make a bold new proposition for public transport,

[redstonedust]

and you may say "if you want transport that goes on a predetermined on rails route you want trains" and thats true i do want trains. but i want trains that do sick loops and make me vomit. its an improvement for nobody and it would be awesome.

[left-lateral-incisor]

[annabelle--cane]

to try and give you a glimpse into my twisted polyamorous mind, hearing people say "polyships are so sanitized and boring to me, those characters should be monogamous and toxic instead" sounds about equivalent to "these three characters can only have compelling toxic drama if just two of them are friends with each other, if they're all a friend group then that's boring." What. what do you mean. What Do You Mean. how are those things even related. do you think friend groups of 3+ never have fallings-out over secrecy and betrayal? I feel like I'm insane.

[sturionic]

"Learn the fundamentals first" seems like really sound universal advice, and as a former classical musician, I can vouch for it. You will have a more solid foundation for increasing complexity if you put in the time to study in a structured way. If you don't, you'll have a lot of shit to fix later.

As a former music teacher, I can also say that "learn the fundamentals first" is the death knell for a vast percentage of beginners, especially adult learners.

I've run into this with drawing several times, where some well-meaning artist has lectured me on needing to study anatomy properly or not use shortcuts like CSP brushes. And oh, believe me, I know. I know exactly how to learn an artistic discipline in a structured way. I just...don't want to!

The thing is, I'm not aiming to be a professional artist. I want to draw my gay little anime guys. I would undoubtedly improve at art much faster if I approached every gay little anime guy drawing as a study exercise. But I would also have quit drawing a decade ago if I couldn't just let myself enjoy drawing imperfect fucked-up little guys with whatever shortcuts I needed to body myself across the finish line.

With my adult piano students, my approach was always "What's your goal?" If their goal was to learn exactly one Elton John songbook to play at parties, then...that's what we did. We'd put tape on the keys to label the notes, and just fuckin go for it. Learning exactly one Elton John songbook is a good and noble musical goal, full stop.

Some of my students needed and enjoyed a more structured approach to learning; if they wanted to be able to play classical music, then yes, scales were going to have to enter the equation at some point. And yet others would learn the Elton John songbook, catch their white whale, and realize they wanted to explore more of the ocean. The scales were still there for them to learn!

Often the choice isn't between "learn art well" and "learn art imperfectly" - the choice is between "learn art imperfectly" and "don't do art at all." To which I say, learn imperfectly! Or, what the hell, don't 'learn' art. Just do, and enjoy the doing of it.

You have official permission from your local pretentious classical music snob: fuck the fundamentals. You can always unfuck them later (but only if you want to).

[turoce]

into the gloom you go

[exeggcute]

one of my favorite this american life segments of late is about the people who played orchestra pit for phantom of the opera on broadway and how, like, a sizeable majority of them had literally been playing the show since it opened in 1988 (on broadway. I know it opened in 86 on the west end, you random pedants, but I am specifically talking about broadway musicians) because their contracts stipulated that they'd have jobs throughout the show's entire run... but nobody anticipated that phantom would become the longest-running broadway show of all time.

and none of these people wanted to walk away from a guaranteed job, so very few of them ever quit. they just kept doing the same show eight nights a week... for twenty or thirty years... and by the time it finally closed last year most of these musicians (who had been working together for DECADES) hated each other and really really fucking loathed phantom. I can't stop thinking about it. it's indescribably hellish to imagine but also the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.

[exeggcute]

can you imagine.

[bisexualshakespeare]

[ID: excerpt from an article reading: One of my favorite stories, which should drive anyone who has every played in a band crazy-- there’s this bassoon player who has sat next to the same clarinet player since 1988. She’s convinced he plays half a note4 flat on every note he’s every played. He denies this. /]

[cleverlittlefox]

[cleverlittlefox]

[cleverlittlefox]

[uwillneverknowwho]

Literally always take headphones with you. If you decide that you probably won't need them today, that's the devil talking. You will. You will

[temporarilytrappedincarcosa]

Hello Trafficblr, I owe you an apology. I thought you guys were exaggerating stuff in order to make your ships but no, they are really just like that. Martyn and Mumbo get married. Grian and Mumbo have an interaction in which one of them calls the other handsome and then they forget which of them it was and both try to claim that they called the other handsome. Everyone I saw in Double Life not only insisted on the soulmate terminology, but persistently used language usually associated with marriage and romance. Special mention to Grian building a heart for BigB. Whatever the fuck is going on with Scarian. Joel and Lizzie are literally married.

[dannyjohnsons]

Excuse me 😊 I Need YourHelp 🙁You Need to Kill Me

[wiimotion]

T_T I wish bathroom-related disabilities weren’t still today the subject of so much baseless ableism and hatred.. When you learn that kind of shame, it can kill you. People think “it’s too embarrassing to be seen buying an enema, or to go to the ER and need a manual disimpaction. I’ll just wait this one out” and then the bowel perforates and that can kill you in no time at all. And a LOT of it is just because of the meaningless stigma surrounding something as universal and basic as.. peeing and pooping?? That’s insane! Everyone does it! Get over yourself and stop perpetuating shame!! Knowing someone has to wear a diaper will not kill you, but the embarrassment that person feels might just kill them!!

[cryinginabananasuitinacorner]

Been re-reading my copy of Sherlock Holmes, and I never noticed how little Watson actually speaks in the text. Other than a couple questions and a few equivalents of ‘oh my!’, the main way we hear his thoughts are through his narration. Now I know this probably because ACD had a limited amount of words, and watson dialogue wouldn't be as interesting to the readers- But I like the idea of 'WORD FAMOUS DETECTIVE and his hypeman that he brings along’. You never hear a peep out of that guy, he just stands menacingly in the background until Holmes says something like “ah yes. He was 6ft tall.” and he goes “ AHH FUCK YEAH, THATS MY FUCKING BITCH I LOVE YOU YOU’RE THE SMARETEST PEROSN IN THE WORLD I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU GOT THAT LETSS A FUCKING GOOOOOOO!!!!!!” and then falls silent again.

[teaboot]

Is my knee-jerk reaction coming through for anyone else

[creatingblackcharacters]

It's the way it was a simple, objective statement. White allyship 101. "White trans ppl can be oppressors too." Yes. Because Whiteness brings systemic power over their peers of color, even if you are in some way marginalized yourself. Queerness does not cancel out racism. We've talked about this. We've talked about white privilege and what it does and doesn't mean. These were conversations everyone swore they were having in 2016. 😐 And now a blow up of fragility on par with the conservatives we're supposedly up against together. What even.

[creatingblackcharacters]

And I'm not trans so it's not like it's my right to stand here and speak for anybody who is. But from the perspective of Blackness and Bisexuality, of KNOWING that no amount of being queer has ever prevented white queer folks from being racist to me, despite the shared reality that is so long as you buy into white supremacy for your own benefit you will never break your own chains of homophobia and enforcement of gender....

[frawgs]

putting ketchup on fries is too permanent for me … i have to dip . i control the sauce

[kinktendo-shamecube-is-dead]

[tanadrin]

So one of the things that can apparently contribute to kidney issues in cats is if they eat too much dry food and don't drink enough water; cats are adapted to get a lot of their water from their food since they're originally desert animals, and might not get enough water if they don't eat wet food. Unfortunately, Dozy won't eat wet food no matter what; she categorically refuses to touch the stuff. So a few months ago, we were looking for ways to get Dozy more fluids, and my wife noticed at the pet store a cat drink--basically meat broth with some floaty bits in--that was low-protein and meant for cats with kidney issues. So we figured, worth a try, right?

Great news: she loved it. Super tasty apparently. Great success. Along with the kidney-sensitive treats we found, it was a nice way to supplement her diet. Unforseen long-term consequence though: she loved it so much she began demanding it throughout the day. Like, would come up to us and meow, and meow, and meow, and not stop, until we got up, went to the kitchen, and got her some cat drink.

And by doing so on demand, we have unfortunately created a monster: no matter what we are doing at home, Dozy knows that if she sits next to you and meows, 1) you know what she wants, and 2) you know that she will not stop until you get it for her now. And when you do get it, she gets extremely excited. She will bum rush the kitchen door as you enter. She will run around your feet as you open the can. She will let out the creakiest, crunchiest, most nails-on-the-chalkboard meow you've ever heard if she thinks you're not going fast enough.

I do not begrudge her this. It is gratifying to care for a creature whose most ardent desires are so simple that it is this easy to fulfill them. But I am a little sad, because I know in my heart that I have never loved any comestible as much as she loves this cat drink. She has a pleasure of a purity and intensity that I will never know.

[the creacher in question]

[teaboot]

Nothing on earth could have prepared me for the fucking face of Dozy

[chuwenjie]

A compilation of stuff I know about drawing Asian faces and Asian culture! I feel like many “How-To-Draw” tutorials often default to European faces and are not really helpful when drawing people of other races. So I thought I’d put this together in case anyone is interested! Feel free to share this guide and shoot me questions if you have any! I’m by no means an expert, I just know a few things from drawing experience and from my own cultural background. 

[what-even-is-thiss]

I think that you need to have a certain amount of rule breaking attitude to be the first to do something.

I think that my grandmother didn’t become the first woman race car driver because she’s the sort of person who thinks that every time you eat at a dining table you need a full table placement. You can’t just bring a plate and fork to the table you’ve gotta have like tablecloth, placemats, two kinds of knives, the works. Her mind cannot comprehend a universe where you could just eat a sandwich off of a napkin at the table.

So in the same vein she couldn’t conceive of a woman race car driver because there weren’t women race car drivers when she was a kid. She was like “oh it just wasn’t done back then” so she didn’t even try even though that was her dream job.

Anyways I do often wonder how much talent and passion has been lost over the years because there’s a lot of people out there like my grandmother who can’t conceive of things outside of the established norms. If there had been even one person who pushed her to follow her dreams, she probably would’ve been a damn good race car driver but nobody did and she wasn’t.

[what-even-is-thiss]

The thing is, I’m also naturally a rule follower. I can conceive of breaking the rules, but actually breaking them makes me think I’m gonna get in trouble. Or at least that’s how I used to be.

There were people in my life who taught me how to question the rules and assert myself and I had parents who encouraged me to follow my dreams first and think about money second.

I got lucky though. Not everybody has people to teach them how to be bold and not everybody is naturally a rule breaker.

So somebody that wanted to be a race car driver became a housewife because she didn’t know that there were already women race car drivers. And she had a fun and interesting life as a housewife but she didn’t do what she really wanted.