Stranger on your street

For all the people who feel left behind, stories stretching galaxies apart. Your veins bleed stardust and I hope you'll feel at home here.

[ourunspokenepithets]

And sometimes, on days like this, I stand up and say I want to burn the world down.

Here’s the thing about being a high-school has-been with friends that you would melt these gilded halls for: sometimes you tell no one and everyone at the same time by the way you walk and because of things that have occurred between the four cream coloured walls of your living room on valentine’s, shaking hands and dark circles feel more like handbag accessories, sold separately, than symptoms of unimaginable stress and anxiety. 

From all of this, I look pretty sad and stressed so you wouldn’t think that I was mostly angry, would you? 

My mom laughed after I flinched back from her hug, my friends are all breaking too, my hands are overrun (bones shaking and crackling at the slightest sense of stress), have I mentioned that I wanted to burn down this school? The green threads in the corner of my vision are snapping and breaking and sometimes I feel more like I’m faking that failing (you’re good at keeping it together, aren’t you?)-

It feels like I’m living in an apocalypse, so I’m doing what I do best, live blogging my chains and bolts and pains so that they act as a precursor of future events (I prefer to think that one day, I’ll have written it all out and feel more alive and less burdened than when this began). At the end of the day, however, it wouldn’t be me if I didn’t fight tooth and nail to give someone hope. 

So this blog is half battle, half prose, but all hope. 

And this will be the last sad post I ever write (without a resolution, it’s no point pretending life is black and white, and that my eyes won’t be coloured red in a while), because if the world burns around me, I want the pain of the blaze to be overshadowed by the beauty of a dying fire instead.

I will continue on. And so will you. And so will all of us. 

(And I will try to do what I wanted to at 13: Save you. Save me. Save us. One day I will wake up and the taste of blood in my mouth will be but a distant memory. One day you will wake up and the sadness will feel more like a dull, ancient, ache than an ever-present stabbing blade. One day we will wake up, and the world will not be the same.) 

[uchihaculture]

[ourunspokenepithets]

11/04/24

Hello I did fourteen entire tasks to completion today and I'm proud of myself thank you for listening!

[frndly-nbh-enbee]

thinking a lot about how last year i committed to the bit too hard and accidentally made jester hats a symbol of sex appeal (it’s a long story) amongst the campus queers to the point where one acquaintance who i didn’t know well at all spent ages attempting to find a jester hat to get for their partner (who i knew slightly better but also not heaps) for their birthday.

[rhfffas]

wake up babe us sapphics have our own angel x demon ship now!!!!!!

[variousqueerthings]

a list of queer online archives and research spaces

A list of some spaces I’ve been reading up on queer history, culture, and politics – spaces like researchgate are also gold mines if you’re doing more specific research, but the below are easy to navigate if you want to go down rabbit holes, look for sources, gain hitherto unknown perspectives, etc.

A lot of these are very guerilla, a few are more established/have funding – all of them have stories that have historically been deemed immaterial by colonialist – and therefore queerphobic – mainstream societies. I was trying to keep a focus on history, but there’s some question about how we define that – personal histories? recent histories? histories of media? blog posts that are older than x?

Pleasepleaseplease feel free to add with country-specific archives and research spaces, especially if you’re from outside of America or England

***

MakingQueerHistory: An amazing site with tons of history, that’s also always looking for writers who want to make additions (I believe currently anyone who’s not writing on America or England is preferred). At the bottom of each article are a list of sources. If you have some extra cash I recommend throwing a couple of dollars a month their way, the work they do is astounding [link] (global)

Queer As Fact: A podcast that explores a range of historical people, places, media, etc. Very enjoyable rabbit holes, and it’s fun to hear as things are being explored and learned [link] (global)

The Intersex Roadshow: I confess I’ve had a hard time finding a dedicated space centering on intersex people and intersex history. However this one has been running since 2009, and before you think that isn’t so long, consider 13+ years of words! The link goes to the first post on the site, introducing Cary who’s been running it. It’s both personal and broad in its scope [link] (misc)

West Yorkshire Queer Stories: A series of oral histories from West Yorkshire, interviewing people about Pride, community, personal histories, intersectional rights, etc. Over 200 stories! [link] (local, North England/West Yorkshire)

Queer Music Heritage: I haven’t delved as far into this one as I want (yet), but does exactly what is says on the tin! I can’t even begin to describe how rich this site is, you’ll have to simply experience it [link] (global - may be Western-centric)

National AIDS Memorial: I’ve only used this to see the interactive AIDS quilt (and if you haven’t I recommend you do), and I believe this is America-specific, however its historical and current work is amazing [link] (America)

Digital Transgender Archive: Possibly one of the best resources out there – tons of materials, user friendly, global. If you want to take an aimless stroll, or have specific searches in mind, it’s worth a look. A tangible feeling of History [link] (global)

Museum of Transology: A beautiful building of story, with the very simple message that the materials that make up trans peoples lives are worthy of being saved, documented, and remembered. You can check out the various collections + the page dedicated to QTIBIPOC stories [link] (UK)

To Survive On This Shore: A treasure trove of stories and images of older trans people – sometimes we’re fooled into thinking that we really don’t have a lot of elders or stories, but we really really do [link] (America)

t4t: A series of articles, essays, and stories about being trans and non-binary, by a variety of writers. the writing includes sex, bodies, divinity, and more and it periodically gets updated [link] (America)

76crimes: This is not an archive as such, but it covers news in countries that criminalised/currently criminalise homosexuality, and so has a lot of information from around the world, both historical and current. Global ally-ship is very very important and so is acknowledging how much homo- and transphobia have been created by colonialism [link] (global)

QueeringTheMap: People placing their personal stories all over the world onto different parts of a map, with little bits of texts – anything from first kisses, sex, gender affirming surgeries, support, fun, life-changing events, etc. [link] (global)

The Smithsonian: The LGBTQ+ section of the Smithsonian covers articles on history and culture [link] (I believe global)

Gay History and Literature: So this historian called Rictor Norton just has this website where he uploaded a flipping ton of his writings. It’s mainly threw a gay male lens, but he allows himself to bloom out into lesbian, bi, and trans history here and there. So worth a looong exploration. I first stumbled on it, because he has a whole section dedicated to a history of guys writing each other love/sexual letters. He also has a bunch of links to other websites, but I am far from doing a proper sleuth yet! [link] (global)

***

Movies, articles, misc

Body Talk: A series of conversations on the history of transness in cinema between Willow Maclay and Caden Mark Gardner [link] (global - Western-centric)

Isaac’s Law: Essays on transmasculine camp, queer masculinity, gay dudes and the like… [link] (personal, misc)

The Anarchist Library: Not queer specific, but you can search for keywords and there’s a wealth of essays, dating back further than you’d think (be aware if you’re searching for words like “gay” or “queer” older texts will be archived with them under their older meanings [link] (I believe global)

Queer Movies: Specifically curated lists of queer movies that covers everything from specific genres to history to documentary. Regularly updated, always interested in suggestions [link] (global)

Trans Male Movies: A site documenting representations of trans men, transmasculine people, and non-binary people who were assigned female at birth (as this can often be a messy overlap in film) in media [link] (global)

[uneducated-author]

Will always laugh at the fact that when choosing a home for the angel in Good Omens, both Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett decided simply 'ahhh, yes let's put him in sexy gay town' and dropped Aziraphale and his bookshop in Soho, which at the time, and even now, was renowned for it's queer history.

Like literally, we know that Aziraphale is settled and integrated in the local community by 1967. At the time, a lot of the queer community had migrated into West London, but 1968 had the opening of Madame Jojo's (NOT AN ANIME REFERENCE, IT'S LITERALLY CALLED THAT) and in the 80's it fully blossomed into the LGBTQ+ utopia it is today (as well as a red light district).

I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO ADD

Madame Jojo's, which opened a year after the scene in Good Omens, actually closed in 2014 due to gentrification (the official reason was because of a violent incursion but like. Mmmmm press f to doubt)

HOWEVER

In 2019, the same year as the season 1 release date, it reopened as a venue for burlesque and cabaret.

I like to think of it as a little miracle from Aziraphale and Crowley.

[thriftdyke]

I feel like a lot of times ppl talk about gaining their parents’ acceptance of their lgbt identities by being like “but I’ll still have a normal life! I’ll still fall in love and get married, and yes you can still have grandchildren!” at least I’ve seen that a lot in like. Media. But I feel like we need to normalize being queer in a way that is Not equivalent to a “normal life, just with genders switched”. I would argue that queerness as a way of life is an inherent rejection of the norm. Same goes with “love is love” and “it doesn’t matter who you love or fuck” kind of statements, like sure that’s Nice, but for me queerness is not about Who I love or fuck. It’s about who I am and my outlook on life. It’s a way of revolutionizing how I define my relationships and what “family” means. I am probably never going to “settle down” or get married, I may never even have a traditional committed romantic partner or anything like an “average” sex life, I sure as hell do not want to live in a single family home with a sole partner and kids and be isolated from all sense of friends and community, and even if I woke up straight tomorrow, I am never ever touching a razor or wearing makeup to work again. You don’t necessarily have to be “queer” to have this perspective, and I’m definitely not saying that all queer people do or should live this way, but I would argue that it is a perspective that emerges from queerness and is deeply intertwined with queer history and culture. If I wasn’t a lesbian I would be a completely different person, and that’s not just because I would be loving or fucking men. It’s because I wouldn’t have had to completely deconstruct my relationship to womanhood and femininity and romance and monogomy and all of these things that are deeply ingrained in the structure of society. and I Want straight and cis people to have access to the freedom that comes from that deconstructing, but I think we do ourselves and them a great disservice by trying to make queerness palatable or “the same as” straight/cis-normative life

[waitingforthesunrise]

emotional processing is so funny because sometimes you’ll be violently sobbing on your bedroom floor over something that happened 4 years ago and then you’ll just. get up and make coffee. and go to the grocery store. and take all this fundamental sadness for a walk. and ponder the cosmic experiences of humanity while eating a sandwich. and that’s healing.

[the-lemonaut]

Characters co-owned w @_magic.stardust_ on IG 😌✨ (a couple more comics abt this on my account already)

I'm not a very positive person, i have a LOT of doomer tendencies. I feel everything like it's cranked up to the max, and as you can imagine it doesn't feel great. Every day throws more atrocious things in my face, and i can't ignore it 🥲

I see other people feeling the same way. We dissociate and numb ourselves by watching, playing, buying stuff. Hateful movements are gaining traction and climate change has its foot in the door

And it's all happening either way, to some degree. I feel like shit, and i'm sick of that. I might as well have a little bit of hope, otherwise i'll go bonkers 😭 Do we continue doomering our way through life or ignoring things altogether, or do we choose to hope a little?

That's why i'm looking into Solarpunk and am thinking of taking any readers (and myself) on a little journey through a better world, and how it might work, through a series of mini-comics I'm posting here. I don't have all the answers (no one person ever does), and i don't hold any pretenses that this kind of world is going to be our future. But i often hear "You love critiquing the status quo, but what do you propose instead?" I'd like to find out too. Here's to something we can hope for, no matter how slim the chances are! Because as I said, i might just lose my mind otherwise ☠️

P.S for new peeps: this is an AU with me and my friend's OCs, so all characters are genderless and go by they/them. It's not identical to our world in that regard, but other than this fact we try to keep it more or less realistic 🤙

I spent a thousand krillion hours on this and the other Solarpunk comics, consider throwing 2$ at me on Buy Me A Coffee to raise my spirits :] I'm not doing well mentally these days, but people's appreciation helps a lot. Thank you very much!

[starei]

°˖✧ what ethereal vibe do you give off? °˖✧

[queondagrey]

"Horror is a shrine to imperfection and tells us it's okay to be a monster. We are all monsters at the end of the day. Can we live with that?"

(Most of this comic is adapted from things Guillermo del Toro said in an interview he did with Mike Flanagan)

[sapient-golem]

Enid invading Wednesdays space 24/7

[ourunspokenepithets]

The Made Up Wedding Vows of a Starving Teenager To Her Equally Made Up Girlfriend

"Did you know that in Japan it's considered polite to fluff up rice for the person after you and that once it's finished cooking, white rice is supposed to be mixed so that the grains don't stick to each other?"

That the first time I fell in love with you Was when I realised that you fluffed up our rice On my request (that night), Now routine in our little house Because of that factoid.

Similarly I, a devout believer in the religion of dried oregano, allspice, and and other dead things Use your garden's fresh green chillis in my grilled cheese and laugh at you during dinner and not the TV.

If it was just us at breakfast (like it always is when I say these things Still drunk on the ethereal feeling Of waking up against you, feather-light kisses in the morning) I'd end it here. But we stand here, on an altar On the precipice of living our whole life. Together.

Or In Other words, Mi Amore: I want to have all your candle-lit dinners Feed you all my cookie recipes, Finally buy us that sourdough starter. Make your cat those instagram dog bowls From when we were teenagers. Call our friends over with charcuterie boards And summer salads And Pot Lucks And Night Caps that aren't alcohol but Hot chocolate doused in cookies (It's the other way round. Something about you makes me lose my breath, my tongue.)

Furthermore, I would like to have all your hugs. Love every part of each other, Tread gentle- On my stretch marks On your butter-marble sculpted love handles. (Kill the voices of our mothers) To travel the world with you. Which entails: Serendipity chocolate in December, Cacio E Pepe at Vapiano's Eggs from Here & Now Every Goddamned Summer.

I do not know much about marriage, or the raising of a family, or the making of egg roses. This is okay. I Can Learn.

Because Once, I knew nothing but hunger And Now, We have a thousand meals ahead of us.

[brytning]

When you're tired, stressed, burned out, depressed, or just busy, figuring out how to feed yourself multiple times a day can take more energy than you have to give. Here's a resource I've been leaning on lately so that feeding myself is easier. I've never been a meal prepper because I don't like eating leftovers over and over, and taping a written list of snack ideas to the pantry hasn't worked for me in the past. When I tried a visual method by saving a folder of photos on my phone, something clicked. I'm a visual person---of course I would benefit from seeing a personal menu of food in my own kitchen! (I haven't tried it, but I imagine a visual menu would work for kids too.) Right now, my menu has a lot of appetizer-type finger foods on it because that's what sounds good and doesn't take long to make or reheat. Maybe I'll change my menu out seasonally like a restaurant... Anyway, I hope this sparks an idea for you if deciding what food to make is a struggle. If not this method exactly, experiment and see what makes the task easier for you! I'm all for saving energy on daily, routine tasks so that I can spend it where it's really important.

[bamsara]

Something I made while dealing with my own stuff and hoping drawing this would pick me up somehow. Maybe it worked.

FT my cat. His name is Mischief

[politijohn]

Source

Some good news!