
blake kathryn
Cosmic Funnies
YOU ARE THE REASON
RMH
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

Andulka

Kiana Khansmith
Xuebing Du
No title available
Game of Thrones Daily
Keni

No title available
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

#extradirty
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
NASA
Mike Driver

izzy's playlists!

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from China

seen from India

seen from China

seen from Australia

seen from Germany

seen from United Kingdom
seen from Malaysia
seen from Netherlands
seen from Germany
seen from Türkiye

seen from Taiwan
seen from United Kingdom

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Singapore

seen from United Kingdom
@partygalsincorporated
trying to harness train her and she immediately got in this position and got stuck
okay, done. my second viewing thoughts under the cut.
The next doctor who should be a dog (golden retriever) and hold his sonic screwdriver (it looks like a bone) in his mouth and he still goes on adventures in the tardis (all the buttons look like dog toys) and he wears a dumb collar that gives him an old fashioned robot voice so he can monologue about time and space and tragedy but he is also a dog so the cybermen would throw a ball and he would go after it
Mom nightmare: Your eldest kid gets a heart attack from playing on the computer too much
Dad nightmare: Eldest son does something gay in front of all the DEVO guys
The year is 1492. You are the Catholic Monarchs - both of them. Isabel and Fernando, tanto monta, monta tanto. You have just finished kicking all of the Muslim powers out of Iberia, and you’re feeling so pleased with yourselves that you expel the Jews about it. You have a problem, though - there’s this annoying Genoese moron named Christopher Columbus who keeps waving some bad math at you, insisting that the world is actually smaller than everyone thinks it is and he could totally sail to India by going west. He gets on your nerves so much that you just give him a couple of ships and send him off. He definitely won’t make it to India, but maybe he’ll find some little island and give all of your newly-unemployed hidalgos something to keep them busy. He’ll probably just starve to death in the middle of the ocean, and then he’s no longer your problem.
The year is 1519, and you are Hernán Cortés. You and all of your compatriots are stuck in the most effective way to make someone a bad person: put them in a situation where they must become incredibly wealthy and powerful incredibly fast or else they will die horribly. Transatlantic voyages are absurdly expensive. Anyone in the ‘New World’ who isn’t rich enough to afford their own army is deeply in debt, with no collateral but their own sword-arm. It is an environment that does not reward half-measures. It does not even reward full measures. It only rewards putting a brick on the gas pedal and crossing your fingers - if you kill one person then you’re a murderer, but if you kill hundreds of thousands of people then you're a paragon of glory and the Spanish crown will make statues of you.
The year is still 1519 and you are Moctezuma II, Huēyi Tlahtoāni (great ruler) of the ‘Aztec Empire,’ also known as the Triple Alliance, or the Mexica. You know a thing or two about half-measures not being rewarded, because you are in a process of rapidly expanding and consolidating a nascent Mesoamerican empire. You are quite good at your job - even before you ascended to the throne, you cultivated a reputation as a skilled warrior, a dedicated student, and a devout worshiper. Your name means something like ‘lord who frowns in anger.’ It’s a fitting name, because the process of ‘imperial expansion and consolidation’ generally involves killing lots of people. To make matters worse, some weird hairy white guys showed up out of nowhere and they keep demanding an audience with you. You try every trick in the diplomatic handbook - deferment, threats, flattery, bribes - but everything you do just seems to make them more single-mindedly focused on your destruction. Later, after you are dead, they will claim that you thought they were gods.
The year is 1545, and this whole ‘colonialism’ thing is starting to peter out. Trans-Atlantic voyages are still ruinously expensive, and the pickings are getting slimmer every day - it’s not like you can go loot Tenochtitlan a second time. You’re starting to wonder if it’s time for everyone to pack up, go home, and forget about… holy shit is that a mountain of silver? Is that an honest-to-god mountain with more silver in it than every other existing silver mine on the face of the earth combined? Yes. Some call it Potosí. Many will call it “the mountain that eats men.” In a single moment, colonialism goes from a plundering campaign for recently-unemployed soldiers to a permanent institution. The alchemists back in Prague and Vienna never learned how to turn lead into gold, but the mercenaries and taskmasters in Potosí found a much simpler equation to turn blood into silver.
The year is 1571, and the economy of the Ming dynasty doesn’t feel so good. Their experiment with paper money was a failure, to put it gently. The experiment with paper money failed horribly. It turns out when you try to have paper currency but you don’t have sophisticated counterfeit protections and there’s also a booming cottage industry of people making paper in their cottages, well, you can guess how that ends. So you’re trying to shift to a silver economy. But then you run into an even bigger problem: you don’t have enough silver. So if you start demanding taxes in silver, the price of silver will skyrocket, which means taxes will skyrocket when the economy is already ailing from the whole ‘paper money’ thing. Some hapless scholar-official in Guangdong is nervously watching a peasant sharpen his pitchfork when he gets word from a messenger: some gweilo just showed up at the part with literal shipfuls of silver and they want to buy silk, tea, spices, and porcelain at outrageous markups.
Within living memory, the world was still ‘medieval’ in many ways - slow, parochial, zero-sum, carefully arbitrated by tradition and precedent. Legible. And now Spanish sailors take Bolivian silver on ships guarded by West African mercenaries and Japanese ronin, sailing to their colony in the Philippines to rub shoulders with Chinese officials, Indian sultans, and Malay merchants. All because some dipshit from Genoa got his math wrong and wouldn’t shut up about it.
The moral of this story is that I’m going insane.
#Ironically Columbus made the world small
This must feel so good to do as a seal
my name's cougar but my friends call me mountain lion and my mama calls me puma and today's my first day at big cat high. i'm so nervous i hope they don't realize i'm not panthera >ܫ<
emo cheetah jughead smoking behind the school: it's hopeless, catamount. they'll never see us as 'real' big cats... us outcats gotta stick together -ﻌ•
not pictured is the goth clouded leopard girl who bought the cigarettes w her fake id
Some of my favorites from C. M. Kosemen's sketchbook Tangent Worlds:
Two friends, a fungus-man and a meat ghost with multiple eyes, are baffled by the implications of a triangle that should not exist.
A feminine spirit rescues another from torment at the hands of malevolent beings.
Anatomical studies and drawings of animals which evolved in a universe where telekinesis is real. The oversized brains of these Telekinesizoans are used for lifting the animal and manipulating food items. Only a small section of the brains are used for conscious perception, effectively making most Telekinesizoans quite “dim.” An “advanced” form, with almost no visible appendages.
Advanced Telekinesizoans move not by levitating themselves, but by manipulating the air flows around them. This predatory form (a Polteropterygid,) strikes its victim with stone missiles that it hurls by telekinetic force.
Different species of Telekinesizoan herbivores have different "signature” items that they sculpt and carry with themselves as they forage. These ornate items, carved telekinetically out of stone or wood, serve both as display structures and weapons.
The para-insect species seen on the left had the remarkable ability to speak, not unlike a parrot. I saw them repeat word-like sounds in idle moments, yet their forest world contained no intelligent species. I was unnerved and hurriedly severed all connections with that particular Earth.
Sketches of “final beings” that will live a billion years from now. These beings have the ability to look into the “space between spaces” and catch glimpses of the past.
Sketches of reptiles which fly by “propellers” powered by coils of tightly-winding muscle fibers. The propeller-blade-like “fingers” reverse their pitch as they rewind, ensuing continual forward thrust.
On the distant world of Zarnia, gravity is high and plant life resembles flat, green-and-purple tiles of road pavement. This combination of flat terrain and hard surfaces has enabled the evolution of a spectacular way of life: Zarnia has animals with wheels instead of legs. Left, This long-necked herbivore defends itself with mace-like swings of its armored head. Right, Male and female varieties of a herbivorous tetracycl species.
It is hard to perceive time directly when moving across dimensions. I couldn’t tell which forms were the ancestors and which were the descendants in this transition between intelligent, human-like beings and asinine reptiles.
All beings seen on this page are descendants of nanotechnological “crystal machines” which blossomed into their own ecology after being created as industrial tools by an older race. Reproducing through “intelligently designed” blueprints modified and mutated through errors of transcription, they exhibited a spectacular, quasi-Darwinian evolutionary process in action. The world of the crystal beasts was also noteworthy in that it was home to actual “ghosts” and “spirits;” vagrant AIs and semisentient processing software left over from the age of industry. Such “ghosts,” transmitted through radio organs present in most species, could “possess” individual animals and get them to engage in unusual, self-aware behavior, or even produce virgin births and “twisted” offspring drastically different from their parents.
A “plains sweeper” which ran across grasslands and fed on clouds of small “insects.”
Members of an alien group of animals which have convergently evolved to resemble dinosaurs of the earth’s past.
Sketch of the vast beings that lived on salt flats and fed on air.
Three species of cursorial “advanced” Martian spiders, with fully erect limbs, hips derived from the initial leg segments, internal pseudoskeletons and advanced respiration. The species seen here is one of the top predators of this world.
Visions of winged reptiles (unrelated to pterosaurs,) that sail on the calm lakes like living boats. Their long, supple necks help them catch fish. It seems like not all saillizards come from the same lineage - there were many different combinations of limbs, wings and sails.
Art is the most certain sign of intelligence. This page shows a selection of dinosauroid cave-art. Cave art depicting a pack of tyrant-raptors, dangerous predators of the dinosauroids.
Sketch of a neosauropod gentleman with a tasteful covering of body paint and an ornate smoking pipe that denotes his status as a herd-orator. The sonorous conversations of these beings can be heard, like thunder, for hundreds of miles.
Giant laser robot (it/its) girl says trans rights.
i fucking love when halloween music is just surf rock with a ghoul laughing in the background
Leave him alone, he's enjoying his meal. Too cute!
travelling back to the paleolithic era to explain to a neanderthal that in the future there will be food that is simultaneously disgusting and also the best tasting food you've ever eaten. the neanderthal nods and says "oh yeah we have that" and leads me to a clearing in the woods where a perfectly normal mcdonalds sits.
Look outBig tooth cat in play place