soft-baked melancholia

vanz / 30s / lesbian / occasionally gross/ ao3

[patrocles]

vanz. floridian against my will. passionate about mountain dew baja blast and malick films, chronically boring with the demeanor of a senior citizen confirmed bachelor. im mixed race

i make gifs

i write fics

i have a face

[patrocles]

Stepmom (1998) was foundational yuri in my home

[patrocles]

every pic i see of bedard and wemby is the cutest thing i’ve ever seen

[patrocles]

in 2003 the nhl said yes we will draft the emo quebeqois twink goalie first overall and we will NEVER recreate this kind of magic again

[patrocles]

maybe i shouldn’t laugh but the try guys reigniting gay jonathan toews allegations and he immediately retires is the 3rd day of pride is cracking my shit up

[dogpuppy]

He is my princess diana

[loveisactivated]

I came back for you.

[patrocles]

coordinated hit pieces during pride, i’m fucking sure

[patrocles]

marner threatening to trauma dump only IF vgk wins is kinda camp i wont lie

[patrocles]

can you explain connor bedard?

i say this as someone who is not a blackhawks fan, but i think there’s something so interesting about a Prince that was Promised for some reason being treated like they resent him even being there. like i dont know what this kid has done to make the league turn against him but i think it’s making him a more interesting player to watch. (i swear i feel like it goes back to him snubbing Biz’a friendship during the winter classic cus biz went from crushing mad on beds to shit talking him thereafter ob broadcast) (i think natemac is like one of the only people i’ve see that actually defends bedard in terms of production)

not to mention whatever weird beef hockey canada has towards him for declining a worlds invitation 1 time, i suppose they’ve decided he’s just not even worth a look ever again.

i think whatever success bedard gets is going to be clawed to the top and hard won. and i think the road being this hard and largely a lonely one is going to make him a better player in the long run. (the crown of the league’s darling is no longer his). nothing like some trauma to add character development. i like that skill doesnt prevent him from being a scrappy little hellcat who isnt afraid to fight some 6’2 30 year old (bc theres no one rly to defend him).

and yet despite it all, everything i see suggests he’s just a chill kid who likes NFL and dance mom reels. he doesn’t feed into rivalry narratives no matter how much they try to push it.

(tho you can tell vibes are bad when people were just so happy he finally made a Friend in nazar. cus it was getting concerning and sad that he just sat home alone all the time and did nothing )

[patrocles]

who of the next gen hockey players do you like? I understand your distaste for macklin celebrini but who else is annoying

i wish i could put this reply in an audio message cus im too tired of typing ALAS

but to clarify my ~issue~ with macklin is really less to do with him on a personal level cus idk these kids how can i have beef with 12 year olds. but simply im woefully unimpressed with uber wealthy frat boy-esque kids kinda void of personality designed to be the next crosby. like ok we get it, but wheres the farm kids, where’s the working class kids, wheres the GRIT you know?

u also just cannot pay me to care about whatever made up ~harem is involved with WSH. like pls hes NOT that interesting

the kids i’m looking forward to see how they develop tho— porter martone is an adopted son. justin sourdif is an impressive kid already. matthew schaefer is just a dandy. leo carlsson is just so sick. i havent seen much of james hagens but i get nice vibes. and i rly hope kashawn aicheson does well with the isles when he debuts

[patrocles]

my only opinion on ryan leonard is that facent is fighting for its life to staying concealed

[patrocles]

as delightful as the rumors are of the flyers looking at mctavish he should honestly go to chicago cus whatevers going on with him and bedard needs answering

[urie]

"you construct intricate rituals to touch the skin of other men" is the sports rpf thesis statement

[thornescratch]

Capitals: A moment at #Pride this #ALLCAPS fan will never forget.

Yeah, so that’s OUR Vezina-winning, Stanley Cup-Hoisting, White House-Declining, handsome, well-spoken (with awesome hair) goalie running into the crowd at Pride to hug a fan, AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT.

[patrocles]

that AI psychosis is nooooo joke just ask my sister who’s now convinced that i sexually abused her all in her childhood and that’s why she became what she became. because chat gpt is telling her this and reaffirming every bad decision she’s ever made as a perfectly valid trauma response that’s not her responsibility in any way. it all must be because i did something horrific to her

[patrocles]