anthony jeselnut

i am not patty but i do have freckles •im 18 and im a girl •i like comedy •chicago

[humansoflatecapitalism]

[narutheaux]

This is what you crackheads sound like talking to each other on this site

[flowerinaflame]

Me at 9:30 PM when I change the oil in my diffuser from peppermint to lavender

[ferretteeth]

i wanted to share maybe the funniest thing ive ever read with you guys

[porterr-robinson]

[ulibeanzz]

florida is just like that

[luthordyke-deactivated20190608]

me absolutely plastered at my own wedding with my beautiful wife right beside me

[celceta]

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

this dude looks like what tommy wiseau thinks he looks like

[eatyourfacecat-deactivated20250]

Awfully bold of you to claim that you or any other human being can even begin to understand what’s going on in Tommy wiseaus head

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

you know what, thats fair

[onlytwitterpics]

[tastefullyoffensive]

[kushblazer666]

mfw im taking selfies and vaping on sunday morning but i realize im in church service

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[keatonpatti]

Bathroom Code

“Do I need a code to get into the bathroom?”

“Nope!”

“Great, thanks-”

“-no code, just several riddles you must answer.”

“…c’mon.”

“Riddle one: what can you see, but not hear. Feel, but not touch. Taste, but not eat. Love, but not like?”

“Um…a clock?”

“That’s an acceptable answer. Riddle two: a plane crashes into a Verizon store. Why do the survivors laugh?”

“Uh…Steve Martin was in the Verizon store and tells a joke or something?”

“Correct. Riddle three: how much money did Will Smith make last year?”

“I don’t see how that’s a riddle…”

“So you don’t know?”

“No, I know. $18 million.”

“Exactly. You may use the restroom, Mr. Smith.” “Call me William Smithilliam.”

“Never.”

[im-diamonds-youre-dust]

[humorstaff]

[thebestoftumbling]

[theonion]

Line Of Lizards Winding Out Door Outside National Geographic Casting Office

[ryangoslingofficial-deactivated]