sad person @peachydaisie - Tumblr Blog

Yes, come on in!

Ok

Yes, yes, come in to my cabin, watch your step please.

You Have A Lovely Hombe

Thank you, Horace. Sit, make yourself at hombe. Or would you like to play a game of Billiards in my special room over here?

Oh I Just Love To Play Balls

We’ll get along splendidly, then.

Some wine?

Oh Enough Chit-Chat And Lets Talk Creams.

Go on.

Well I Just Love Creams. Well They Taste Good. And. Oh The Texture An-

…

*Shrnf…*

Smells Of Steel.

*All pretense and friendly affect is dropped, eyes fixing coldly on the boar*

*Advances*

Well I Simply Knew All A Long

*And Horace Delivers A Series Of Funny Kicks And Rageful SMACKS To The Assailant’s Solar Plexus And Hip Bones*

AAAAAIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! DEFL…AAAA…a.aa….aaating….

floccinaucinihilipilificationa

Hm Hm Hm That Aought To Teach You Scoundrel

*Horace Turns His Handsome Snout To Face YOU*

Rememboar: Dont Go In A Strangor’s House Or Something I Forget

heritage-post

date of origin: November 15th, 2016

badjokesbyjeff

Jesus was relaxing in Heaven when he noticed a familiar looking old man

Wondering if the old man was His father Joseph, Jesus asked him, “Did you, by any chance, ever have a son?”

“Yes,” said the old man, “but he wasn’t my biological son. He was born by a miracle, by the intervention of a magical being from the heavens.”

“Very interesting,” said Jesus. “Did this boy ever have to fight temptation?”

“Oh, yes, many times,” answered the old man. “But he eventually won. Unfortunately, he heroically died at one point, but he came back to life shortly afterwards.”

Jesus couldn’t believe it. Could this actually be His father?

“One last question,” He said. “Were you a carpenter?”

“Why yes,” replied the old man. “Yes I was.”

Jesus rubbed His eyes and said, “Dad?”

The old man rubbed his eyes and said, “Pinocchio?”

yayitsmee

Change your url Jeff

Living in DC right now is really fun because you’ll go to the grocery store for the first time in over a week, see a white man buying tiki torches, and instantly decide that you don’t actually need eggs or milk or fresh produce and hightail it

Living in DC right now is really fun because you’ll clock in at your place of work, which happens to be across the street from one of the city’s largest synagogues, and you’ll see four white bald men with american flag neck buffs as masks and black hoodies walk towards it and you will, for a moment, question whether people are about to die and debate what exactly it is you need to do about it

Living in DC right now is really fun because my family has decided to make the choice to stay in the city and stockpile groceries for the next two weeks. An estimated 20% of the city will be leaving to shelter elsewhere for the week of the inauguration. Any other time in US history, an inauguration draws in Washingtonians and Americans from across the continent. It is supposed to be a celebration of democracy. Instead, we have empty houses and a city preparing for violence waged by non-residents while our streets and our homes pay the cost.