Call me Wren! I'm an aspiring artist, writer, musician, and Marine Biologist! I mainly write fanfic here, but I also have a Wattpad if you're interested! I do take requests, but I am so busy that I don't promise much. As of right now, requests are CLOSED, but I will be working on a requests page before I get it up and running. I have a post with all the request rules written on it, and I will link it here (please ignore the rest. My dumbass set the request rules in another post bc I was hopped up on some new meds 😭).
Here is the important links in this page:
~🌕Masterlist🌕~
-🏭Factory🏭-
In the Masterlist, you'll find all my works and what each tag represents, and in the Factory you'll see all the projects I have slated to be shipped out!
That's all!!! I hope all you lovely darklings a beautiful night/ day!!!
I’m running off of coffee, sarcasm, and a piece of toast. If don’t like, leave. -Wren, when first joining Tumblr
Listen I don't get to decide when the drunk elf that is my executive actually does the functioning but when he does we have a SMALL WINDOW OF TIME before he finds the schnapps again and we're done
Feed your dashboard by answering my question, blogger.
Honestly? Depends ENTIRELY on the tutorial.
If it’s for a game or something, yeah I’ll watch through it to make sure I’m all good to go (oh there’s a story here but that’s a separate post. Let’s just say my first run of avatar was NOT looking good those first few hours…). But like.
If it’s a tutorial for how does my toaster oven work. Nah. I’ll McGuyver (?) my way through that one and count a success when it doesn’t explode.
was playing "fetch" with the ocean today by tossing stones into it and watching them wash back up with the tide a few meters away, and it got me thinking about grief and the things we carry with us even after we lose them
I watched it again. I have realized something, and I wanted to share it.
That fish still had a human heart mixed in with the blood delirium. She was desperate for Simon to never get that box to the surface not because she wanted him to suffer, not because she wanted the others to continue to come down one by one to be eaten by the sea — that’s what the sea wants.
No, the human within her horrific, mangled body is terrified that the black box holds hope. False hope. She was the one down there, she was the one who was there and witnessed exactly what was on that black box. She lived it. She knows that whatever she found before she succumbed to the sea might gather hope within the meager masses that they aren’t doomed, that the truth, the secrets to everything within the Quiet Rapture, lies within the bottom of the blood sea, and of course they must get it — they must send more down to get it, now that they have what they consider “proof”.
But she knows her fate, and she never wants the same for those she cares about. (Ava? Is that you?) She wants everything within this sea to be abandoned and forgotten about so the others have a fighting chance to survive. The blood sea wants to lure every single living soul down to become one with it, it hungers for more and more blood so it may sprout more roots and breathe new, twisted life into the humans it consumes.
Fish can’t leave the ocean. She’s stuck down there, along with the others the sea has taken. She wants the others who are still human, still out of the blood sea’s grasp to leave and never come back — she wants the others to survive.
She follows him carefully at first. She even causes turbulence in the hopes of warding them off — Simon tries to heed her warnings (it’s too dangerous, it's not worth it) but the others are too blinded by hope, hate and desperation to listen.
The sub goes back down. Why? Why did he come back? Why didn't they listen? Must I take you where I died and was reborn anew?
(Simon is still alive).
Must I share an explicit warning, my own grave? Let me cut your ties and take you there, Simon. See it with your own eyes; we are doomed.
(I never told you my name. How did you know my name?)
(You did tell me.)
Simon is crucified, but not for humanity. He is holy in flawed ways, he is trying to make the correct decision for once but he is scared and sick and infected, and of course he does not trust a telepathic fish monster who swings wildly from the truth (you are dooming us all) to hive mind delirium (the light, it is everything, can't you see?). She catches herself several times slipping in and out of lucidity; she tries to tell him (nevermind about the light. That’s not important) don’t look don’t look don’t look.
Why else would there be a huge hole in SM-8 that looks as if there was an explosion from the inside, that got out, not in? That was her.
She, too, is willing to risk herself for the greater good. She, too, thinks this is bigger than me.
It will kill them all, she says, desperate. You can’t do this. She attacks in pure panic when he has exactly what she knows must stay buried. She knows that he is going to become just like her — she knows that he will likely kill her as he transforms in her maw, shattering her in the process. She does it anyway.
(The ship is alive, can't you see? )
The last shots within the sea has Simon transforming and blowing out of SM-13. A mirror of her. Tendrils billow out — he is bigger than she ever was, and he won’t ever have to bite — he will be able to grab and sink, drag closer and closer to the light, even if he wishes not to. They share this fate. They are now one in the same. ( Why you, Simon? Why you?!?)
The devs and Ubisoft went out of their way to make a collectable titled "Lovers' Bracers."
I'm not saying NOTHING.
but also. they're not being really subtle with the Sotey allegations anymore are they?
(mini fic below the cut!) (it's awful i'm so sorry.)
The wood was slowly beginning to burn a hole where it was placed in So'lek's camp. He was sure of it, with how his every sense was tuned to it like a dissonant wind flute in the upper plains.
He had intended to present it to Tamtey, a symbol of his devotion before asking her if she'd wish to be his mate, before... well. Before everything had happened.
It was carved from a Bloodvine branch during their time in the Spires, during the brief moments of rest while they, mostly Tamtey, helped the Ke'awa Kame'tire reclaim their home from the RDA, the wood strong and smooth beneath his practiced hands. It had been such a long time since he'd done anything from the Trr'ong traditions that wasn't collecting the dog tags from his fallen enemies, so using a tradition from his old people meant for softer times was almost jarring in its affect.
So'lek sighed, standing from his resting mat to walk over, picking up the carved wood and tracing the lines of his knife still scored into it. The wood was beginning to dry with it's lack of use and exposure to Pandora, staying smooth only through his dedicated oiling of the branch.
Katir called from her perch above, drawing his ears upright as habit led him to listen for Tamtey's footfalls as she enter the cave of his camp, but he knew it was fruitless.
But he hadn't lost hope. He made a promise to Teylan, to himself, to his ancestors and to those at the Resistance that he would find the scattered remains of the Sarentu and Aranahe and he would bring them back together. And he will one day see this branch banded around Tamtey's arm, it's twin settling comfortably around his.
I am coming, ma'Tamtey, he thinks to himself, I will find you. They do not get to keep you again.
dont get me wrong this is #mood but just try eating a piece of bread with salt. please, seriously. ok? at least a tiny bit. salt helps with nausea, bread calms the stomach acid. if you really can’t face eating anything, just lick some salt like a damn elk, then wait and see if you can manage the bread. make some broth if you’re into that kind of thing. no spices, yes salt. if you’re feeling too weak and shaky to do much, just have a cup of tea with sugar (energy) and lemon (again, good against nausea). nibble on the lemon first, it will feel good, but don’t overdo - citric acid on an empty stomach is a majorly bad idea. take care of yourself, you’re the only you we’ve got
Summary: After the last of So'lek's targets are dead, he resigns himself to seclusion to contemplate what comes next for him. Tamtey is resolute, she refuses to let him retreat into himself.
2.4k Words
Spoilers: This is set during the beginning of the From the Ashes DLC, after the opening sequence but also before the Wind Traders arrive, so there aren't really any spoilers, but if you haven't played it yet, feel free to leave and come back later. There is also a small spoiler for the end of the Skybreaker DLC, so you've been warned.
PS. This is the song I listened to on loop while writing this, and I think it fits the vibe of the fic. So here it is if anyone wants to take a listen.
As the day begins to come to a close, So’lek still sits at his meditation mat in front of his totem in the same position he was at the start of the day. The light filtering through the gaps in the rocky ceiling and the cave entrance begins to dim, and everything is still and quiet. It is the ideal time to meditate, and yet, no amount of focus brings So’lek’s mind any silence.
Three days before, So’lek had finally caught and extinguished the last soldier responsible for his clan’s demise. He thought it would bring him some kind of peace or accomplishment, but it didn’t. It isn’t the man’s death that weighs on his mind. It’s what is meant to come after. He can’t figure it out.
What is he meant to do now that everyone he’s been hunting for the last fifteen years is dead?
Just at that moment, right as an answer begins to form after so much contemplation, an ikran's roar pulls him out of his head and his eyes shoot open with a frustrated sigh.
His ears twitch as he listens closer. One set of footsteps filters through the cave to So’lek’s ears; Light; Familiar; At ease.
Tamtey.
A flash of her face comes to his mind. The borderline fear in her eyes when she tore him off the long dead RDA soldier and he lashed out and hissed in her face before he even realized what he was doing. A pang of shame strikes him again, as strong as it was the moment he’d done it. He plays that moment over in his head again. How is he meant to look at her, let alone speak to her after that?
Thus far, Tamtey left him to his devices after that day. She offered to return to his camp with him and talk when they left the facility, but he declined, stating that he was tired. She hadn’t been by since. Either she’s been too cautious to approach him while he’s still angry, or disgusted with him for the way he punched that man’s face in until it was unrecognizable.
He knew this moment was coming, when she would want to talk about it. Maybe she expects an apology or an explanation.
Behind him, So’lek hears her pad into the cave with a short pause near the entrance. He expects her to call for him, to pull him from his meditation, but that isn’t what she does. Instead, he hears her resume her steps and set her gear down with his own. Then, she moves towards his cooking station, if it could be called that, and sets down more.
So’lek’s tail twitches, but he doesn’t turn around or address her presence. Rather, he shuts his eyes and tries to slip into his meditation again, but he’s acutely aware of her every step, every action that prolongs this uneasy silence between them.
He hears two wet slaps and twin hisses of meat being thrown onto the stones of a blazing fire just as the metallic smell wafts to his nose: Hexapede. His ear twitches again.
She’s making dinner?
Then, her footsteps draw nearer to his mat as she approaches.
So’lek’s spine straightens the moment he feels her settle on the mat beside him, knee brushing his. Her breathing is steady, quiet.
Interestingly, she doesn’t say anything.
Is she waiting for me to say something?
Minutes go by in silence as the meat on the fire sizzles.
So’lek tries to settle.
Tamtey does no such thing.
Instead of shutting her eyes and drifting off on the waves of her consciousness, her eyes remain stuck to the side of his face, tracing the scars there and then down his neck and shoulders. He’s so… tense, she notices.
She turns her head away, but watches him from the corner of her eye and clamps her lips together to hold in her laugh as her tail lightly brushes the length of his. The small tuft of soft hair at the tip tickling the sensitive skin of his tail, back and forth. Over, and over, and over again.
The sensation is almost enough for him to break the silence and tell her to quit it. Almost.
So’lek’s tail swishes in wide, irritated arcs.
A small grin sticks to her face as she waits for him to, inevitably, break.
The staring continues, and it’s so intense that So’lek can feel it.
And her damn tail just keeps on unbearably stroking his.
Unable to stand her unbearable silence anymore, So’lek mutters, “you’re staring.”
Tamtey’s grin grows victoriously, and she clicks her tongue as she turns her head to face him again, “you’re nice to look at.” For a moment, her tail withdraws.
“And you’re restless,” he quips and his tail gives hers a nice thump when it comes back to tease his again. He opens his eyes and looks at her from the corner of his eye. Cautiously, he begins, “I take it you’ve given up on meditating then?”
For all his effort to teach her, Tamtey could never quite settle down.
He’s never minded her company while he meditates, she’s always been respectful of his need for it and usually finds something quiet to do while he does. But this time, it seems she’s determined to get his attention. Then again, he’s never used meditation to avoid her before.
Tamtey’s smile softens and she shifts closer so that her hip presses in his. So’lek’s tail jerks harshly and he makes a throaty warning sound when he feels hers brush it again, until she wraps the end of her tail around his instead of caressing his skin. Her hand wraps around his arm and drifts up and down soothingly until he settles, “who needs meditation? I have you.”
So’lek turns his face slightly in her direction, brows furrowed.
Tamtey elaborates sweetly, “you’re my peace.”
His stoic expression softens and he lowers his head to express his shame. He gives her the apology he thinks she’s looking for, “ngaytxoa.”
Tamtey tilts her head and kisses him on the cheek as she rises to her feet to check on the hexapede meat, “I know. It’s alright, So’lek.”
So’lek’s brows pinch again and he stands to follow her. Then why are you- His ears flatten when he realizes why she’s here. He sighs through his nose, “I am fine, Sarentu.”
In response, her tail gives an irritated little twitch at the name- How many times do I need to ask him to use my name? -while she flips the thick slaps of meat with her knife. “I never said that you weren’t,” she quips with her back turned to him.
“Then there is some other reason you are here,” So’lek states.
Tamtey turns to look at him over her shoulder and raises a brow at him, “I missed you.” That warms his heart. Her next words, though? Not so much. “Why? Do you not want me here?”
So’lek’s face drops and his eyes narrow at her. She knows that’s not the case.
Even still, Tamtey wants to bring that turtle out of his shell just a little bit farther. So, she continues her teasing and turns to lean her hips back against the cooking station, “because I can go, if that’s really what you want.” She points her thumb backwards over her shoulder at the smoking hexapede, “I’ll take my dinner to-go.”
So’lek glances upwards as if begging Eywa to put him out of his misery, even as a bedgrudging smile comes to his face and his legs carry him to Tamtey’s side. He lowers his head and rubs his brow against hers affectionately. He gives in to her whims and mutters a small, grumpy, “stay.”
A triumphant, self-satisfied smile appears on her face as she nuzzles him back, “yay! I feel so welcomed.”
Abruptly with a hot sigh from his nose, he jerks away to look at her, “you are always welcome,” he states. “You knew that when you invited yourself in,” he gestures to the entrance.
“Ooo, grumpy,” she turns her back to him again and pokes at one of the hexapede slabs with her knife, watching the cold blood drip across it. “I get it, I’ll knock next time.”
“That wasn’t-” So’lek stops with a low snarl.
If Tamtey is anything, she is an expert at baiting him. And he lets her, every time.
And her subsequent snort at his expense is proof of that.
Despite his annoyance, So’lek lingers close behind her, drawn in by her like a moth is to flame.
After she flips the hexapede slabs once more, she slowly turns with a gentler expression this time. “So, what’s on your mind, big guy?”
And there it is.
Hastily, So’lek’s face drops and he switches course, turning around to walk towards his inventory near the cave entrance. “Nothing to be concerned about,” he tells her as he examines his pristine equipment as if to find some flaw he missed last time he checked.
From the side, he looks very enthused by this activity. Too focused.
Blatantly avoidant.
For the moment, Tamtey allows him to keep his space, but she remains unconvinced, and decides he needs to be pushed just a little further. “He was the last one, So’lek. It’s… it’s alright to not be okay.”
So’lek turns his back fully to her now to inspect his armor rack, full except for the one empty rack he uses for the vest and waistguard he’s wearing at the moment.
After a minute of prolonged silence, Tamtey sighs sympathetically through her nose and crosses the distance to stand behind him.
Tentatively, she places her hands on his shoulders. Not pulling, barely even grazing his skin. She’s just present there with him. So’lek is tense as his hand reaches to scrub out a scuff mark on one of his vests, but he doesn’t shrug her off.
Another minute passes.
Tamtey presses herself closer now. She wraps her arms lightly around his waist and rests her chin on his shoulder, “you know, after Harding died, I had no idea what I’d do next.” So’lek glances at her momentarily, then looks away. “I had so much anger, I didn’t know where to put it,” she shares and peeks around his shoulder up at his jaw. “Is that what’s happening?”
A moment goes by, and So’lek only lowers his chin and turns his head away so that she can’t see his face.
Tamtey’s hands drift down to the sides of his arms. This time, she grasps and lightly pulls him on his right side, “please look at me.”
Stoically, he slowly turns and looks her in the eyes.
Her eyes dart across his face, attempting to parse understanding from his neutral expression.
Then, she presses a hand to the front of his beaten up vest, right over his heart. “It’s okay to let your anger go, So’lek.” Her fingers brush lightly over the dog tags strapped to his vest, “you can put the Dog Tag Warrior away. You don’t need him.”
Now, So’lek speaks quietly, “the RDA is still out there. They will come again, like they always do.” He holds their eye contact steadily, “they won’t leave y-” he grunts and corrects himself, “us alone.” Tamtey’s brow pinch, “my fight is not over yet.”
For a few seconds, Tamtey just watches him with gentle, understanding red-rimmed eyes. She grabs his hand and holds it near her belly, “you’re right. Our fight isn’t done yet. It might never be.” Her opposite hand cups his jaw for a second, thumb brushing the scar along the side of his face, “but the fight can’t be all there is.”
So’lek finally looks away, behind her head towards the stream running through the back side of the cave, his ears drooped and tail swinging low.
Quickly, Tamtey brings his eyes back to hers by grasping his jaw and turning his face her way. Now, her own eyes shine with held back tears, “I don’t want you to change,” she assures him, “I could never ask you to do that.” She smiles tight-lipped at him and takes a step back, “I just don’t want to lose you.” And this unending vengeance could take you from me.
With her piece said, she strokes his cheek one more time before she turns away and returns to the fire to check on their dinner. Which leaves him to mull over her words.
So’lek begins to turn his back again, then stops short.
Of all people, she knows what I’m feeling the best.
With a deep breath in, So’lek straightens and closes the distance between them again. He slides up beside her at the cooking station, snatching a purple berry off of one of the wooden plates she’s made up for them. He takes the scolding glare she gives him in stride, chewing slowly on the sweet berry.
Tamtey doesn’t speak again, she just waits to see if he will.
After a moment, So’lek asks, “how did you do it?”
Finally, Tamtey turns her body to face him and pecks him on the nose, which he scrunches up thereafter. “I made room for more,” she tells him and swipes a bit of purple berry juice away from the corner of his mouth, “I made room for you; Room for life.” She turns away and pulls their hexapede off of the fire to place them each on a wood plate. “I told you: You’re my peace, ma So’lek.”
Blinking slowly, So’lek leans down and presses his cheek to hers, tenderly swiping side to side. Quietly, he tells her, “I will consider it.”
Tamtey pulls back and smiles at him with two plates in hand, “it’s your choice,” she says as she hands him his plate.
As she moves to pass him, she rises to her toes and kisses his cheek. Just as she is about to leave his side, So’lek stalls her with a hand on her side and dips down to capture her lips in a sweet, unhurried kiss. Tamtey’s free hand drifts upwards to press at the back of his head and keep him close.
Once they part, neither of them go far, nuzzling each other.
Tamtey flashes a toothy grin up at him, “you’re stuck with me either way.” She gives him one more peck before she turns away towards his canopy at the other end of the cave where he keeps his bed and his miscellaneous collections. “I’m not going anywhere.”
For just a moment, So’lek watches her.
As she sits down and beckons him over with a hand and a dazzling smile, So’lek thinks that this must be what peace feels like. Maybe, just maybe, war isn’t all that’s out there for him.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------A/N: I hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. After the newest DLC came out, I was going absolutely feral for this man, as I'm sure we all were and are. So I decided to finally write something for him and share it. If you see any typos, no you didn't.
I feel like this cat's face perfectly sums up how So'lek looks every time that Tamtey bugs him, btw.
gel pens. rollerball. ballpoint pens. hybrid ballpoint pens. what do they all have in common? balls.
at the tip of every one of these pens is a tiny ball that dispenses ink from an ink reservoir (that, when replaceable, is typically shaped like a straw) onto the page through friction rolling said ball. which is why a hybrid ballpoint with a thinner, more free flowing ink is a million times better than a thicker more traditional (non-pressurized) sludgy ballpoint. and why fountain pens are some of the only writing utensils a shitload of people can use without pain, or at the very least a good fountain pen is often the writing utensil someone can write the longest, the most legibly, and with the least amount of pain. compared to other writing utensils
close up of a (presumably) ballpoint pen tip. note the ball. that is the dude who fucked up your wrists and made writing feel horrible and offset and weird your whole life. dump his ass!!!
cheap easy ballpoint recommendation: uni jetstream lite touch (way fucking better and on part with some fountain pens downward pressure wise) or uni jetstream hybrid ballpoint
cheap easy gel pen recommendation: pilot juice up, uni ball signo line, UM-151 is my GOAT because I like the feedback but most people will enjoy the signo RT1 and the shaved edges better
on smooth fountain pen paper, ball-tipped pens often struggle to write (use a writing board or shitajiki underneath), but fountain pens absolutely excel. why? because
fountain pens have no balls.
this is a kaweco sport fountain pen (a fountain pen model that failed to earn my respect, made by a company that actively lost my respect and the respect of a lot of the fountain pen community around the world with their conduct of trying to extort and punish other fountain pen companies to a degree I do not understand how they fucking got away with)
and this is the fountain pen after dissection. not all fountain pens can be taken apart to this degree, it varies pen by pen, and some suck up ink from a bottle differently. different filling mechanisms.
a fountain pen is named after the internal ink reservoir, the "fountain". in the case of a kaweco sport, a cartridge or converter. a cartridge comes pre-filled with ink that gets pierced on the back of the feed and shoots down towards the nib, and a converter makes a little vacuum to suck ink up from bottled fountain pen ink through the nib. and the ink from the cartridge or converter flows throughs the plastic feed's nipple (on the left) which has a thin groove in it called the ink channel that takes the ink towards the breather hole in the nib and then through the slit towards the very tip of the nib.
behind every fountain pen nib is a fountain and a feed. and that feed feeds a nib. and that nib? writes without balls.
or dipping! if you have to dip it, it is not a fountain pen. fountain is critical.
so the goal of a fountain pen ink is to get from the internal ink reservoir to the end of the fountain pen nib. and that way the ink is always waiting at the tip, and therefore nobody has to push down to dispense the ink. you always want to use the least amount of pressure possible with a fountain pen nib as most modern fountain pen nibs of any material type are not designed to flex and can be permanently damaged by trying to flex the nib. all you have to do is hold the pen like this so the underside of the nib hits the paper right
and go! (this nib has no ink in it though. otherwise you would not see as mucb of the paper through the slit on the left)
easy first fountain pen: pilot kakuno (~12usd) or pilot lightive (~20-$30usd) in medium nib, or fine nib if you usually write in pens and pencils smaller than 0.5mm. get pilot namiki, pilot cartridges, pilot iroshizuku cartridges, and/or the pilot con-70 converter do not get any other pilot converter if it fits a con-70. the extra fine nib is if you have already used a dip nib because it will absolutely draw blood. consider getting a writing board/shitajiki while you get used to using a fountain pen. also get a midori MD notebook, 90% of fountain pen ink performance is actually using the right kind of paper, because
fountain pen inks need to be watery! the inks need to be thin enough that they can travel through the feed and they need to be chemically stable enough to not damage the feed or section or nib or any other part of the pen with prolonged contact.
which means that long story short fountain pen inks are some of the pickiest about paper (MOLESKINE NOTEBOOK = DOGSHIT) because there are so many different ways that paper interacts with fountain pen ink. and there is no way to know without trying that specific fountain pen ink on that specific paper or finding someone who has. rubbing paper damages it for whoever buys it, some of the best fountain pen paper is scratchy, tissue thin, some combination of both.
on good fountain pen paper like midori MD and iroful and sometimes tomoe river, pilot blue and blue black in the medium nib actually reflect a metallic red, pictures can never do it justice. paper where the ink takes a little bit to dry often makes for the best color but if you have a good fountain pen ink manufacturer like pilot you want it to look clear and crisp and not blurry or marks the next page. and if that does not happen your paper unfortunately sucks
and this is all critical to know because most bottled ink in the world is not only hard to use in fountain pens, but also prone to clogging it or melting it forever. and a lot of inks very unsafe for fountain pens get sold as "fountain pen ink" on sites like ebay amazon etsy aliexpress temu walmart and a lot of very polished dropshipping websites by people who either do not know their own stock or are lying on purpose or both and none of those options are better because the damage the wrong ink can do to the wrong fountain pen is permanent. you may have to just buy another pen. dip inks are often corrosive on purpose because dip nibs are expected to be cleaned after use and eventually replaced
all because some shithead lied on a listing it makes me so mad
you have to only use inks actually designed for fountain pens. this is a glass diamine fountain pen ink bottle. diamine is a respectable ink manufacturer. diamine declares FOUNTAIN PEN INK right on the bottle label, which is good! "fountain pen ink" should be somewhere on the packaging so everyone knows this is a fountain pen safe ink.
fountain pen inks are a lot of water. almost entirely water. water and a whole lot of color. new fountain pen ink bottles are typically filled almost to the brim with ink. you spill a fountain pen ink bottle and you get a whole lot of water and color everywhere. the most common materials for fountain pen ink bottles are plastic and glass, both typically with a stiff cap of either plastic or a metal. plastic bottle walls often have a little give, but glass fountain pen ink bottles are quite infamously brittle.
right now, there is a dangerous cold front sweeping north america.
and at 32 degrees fahrenheit/0 degrees celsius, something really funny happens to water.
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