beach episode for shane and ilya!
the first time ilya and shane go to the beach together is their honeymoon (all stars game doesnt count, that was for like 5 minutes).
shane packs two gallon size plastic bags full of approved snacks (approved by him of course, ilya made fun of him for an hour then proceeded to finish one of the bags in the car ride to the beach).
shane also brings three water bottles, much to ilya's confusion ("there is two people here, hollander. why is there more water bottles than people in this car? marly's hit is still having effects? "fuck off, it's hot out there" "okay hollander. tell me if i need to call team doct-" "fuck. off.")
when they arrive, shane allows ilya to pick out their spot on the beach (after vetoing his first two picks because "the sand isn't right").
shane refuses to engage in any sexy sunscreen rubbing from ilya ("you fucked me last night and i sucked your dick this morning, you're fine."), instead deciding to efficiently rub in a truly impressive amount of sunscreen onto ilya's body ("stop squirming, you'll miss a spot if i don't do this" "shane, i am like snowman"). this somehow turns ilya on even more and he has to sit with a towel on his lap while he waits for the sunscreen to dry (and pouts).
when the sunscreen is actually dry, the two of them race into the ocean. shane wins and gets to gloat about it for all of two seconds before ilya tackles him into the water ("you got seawater in my mouth you asshole!"). they take turns splashing each other until they get bored, then float in the water, chatting about their plans for the evening and trading old stories from their childhoods ("- then i wake up next morning in my bed, walk out and there in my kitchen is baby bear" "you are such a fucking liar" "I am not!")
after awhile, shane has to go back to shore because of The Textures of the ocean but he makes sure to watch ilya do tricks in the water and shout out scores for each one.
on the beach, shane pulls out a step by step guide on making sandcastles and a small set of plastic tools from their bag (he'd picked them up at a gift shop the day prior. ilya teased him about it, but he needed to make sure he was doing it right). an hour later and ilya has flopped down beside shane in the sand, watching as another person joins the small crowd of onlookers that has gathered to watch shane construct a sprawling mid-century modern sand home, complete with extensive landscaping and a shed ("wow, mr. real estate." "shut it, rozanov, i'm trying to focus."). a small army of children have gathered around him, quietly offering semi wet sand and pretty shells as they watch him work. shane thanks them for each offering, but only uses whatever works for the plan. this somehow adds to their fervor.
later, ilya organizes a game of tag with the kids, sprinting desperately across the sand and taunting them while shane watches from his chair, smiling and drinking a ginger ale.
they pack up in the evening, looming dinner reservations forcing them back to the house and into the shower. they shower together, but they're too exhausted to do anything other than clean themselves and make sappy faces at each other.
when they finally step out of the shower (shane refuses to leave if he feels even one grain of sand on either of them), they both take one look at the outfits that they pulled out for themselves, then the bed, and shane promptly pulls out his phone and cancels their reservation. ("ooh golden boy hollander cancelling reservations? so rude... what will people think?" "oh so you wanna go then?" "fuck no"). they end up standing in the kitchen, quietly eating cold sandwiches that were meant for tomorrow.
they crawl into bed, facing each other and for a moment ilya is overwhelmed with emotion. the love he feels for shane, the joy he feels now at being able to express it. how thankful he is every day for the all-encompassing acceptance and love that shane has shown him in return. he's breathless with it. he doesn't know how to tell shane this. he certainly can't in english and he probably couldn't in russian either.
he just looks at him for awhile, tracing his freckles with the edge of his thumb. shane's eyes are closed but when he opens them again, he knows that shane feels the enormity of this thing between them too, how precious, how important it is.
"i-", ilya starts, unsure, "i wish we could do this every day. be like this - every day". it's not quite right, but shane hums, thinking, and ilya knows he understands.
"that's kinda the cool thing of being married ilya, we can."
