cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this

Joe, 30 ➸

[pettyachilles]

It’s missing Mande hours, so here is a sequence of him running to me when he found out I was taking photos while he was rolling around on the lawn.

[evyltalks]

consensually annoyed.

Commission for @ddaengbrother (on Twitter)

[quelmdn]

He has not the means to defend against this :)

(Redid turret stairs lamen, portrait version ^^)

[avagarde]

It’s so unfair i don’t get to see where evolution will go in 50 million years

[geekysteven]

crab

[existennialmemes]

Crustaceans: Crab

Mammals: Weasel

Plants: Tree

Amphibians & Reptiles: Unchanged because they are perfect

Birds: 360° around back to dinosaurs

Fungi: I shan't speculate on the affairs of gods

[shallowseeker]

replacing the spn angel handcuffs with a collar

[dothwrites]

#Cas handing the collar to Dean like 🥺 you should put this on me 🥺 I think a witch cursed me I don't want to hurt you 🥺#even though it's like the third time this week he 'thinks he's been hit by a witches curse'#Sam points this out but Dean is already fastening the collar around Cas's neck#they're inches away from each others faces btw. staring the whole time#Sam walks away @casdeans-pie

brilliant, show-stopping, no notes ❤️

[shallowseeker]

via @valdelion

[colorlessjay-destielblog]

he doesn't need to touch his face to do all that

Cas knows exactly what he's doing

[prokopetz]

Something I see getting overlooked a lot when discussing queercoding in historical media is that in many cases it's not evidence that the writers secretly shipped it; it was aimed at straight dudes specifically to freak them out. Depicting a male villain as sexually interested in a male hero reads as horror to the cishet male audience. Like, Venom didn't spend years and years being blatantly characterised as Spider-Man's creepy stalker ex because Marvel's writers were all closeted yaoi fans. That was meant to be scary – which of course doesn't mean you can't read it differently, but don't give them credit they don't deserve!

[thagomizersshow]

You ever think about how weird hippos are ecologically speaking?

There's literally no other megafauna on earth that spends the entire day lounging around in water, mostly just socializing, only to come onto land to feed at night.

I remember when I used to do education programs on hippos, most people assumed they ate aquatic plants, and that that's the whole reason they were in water. Meanwhile, hippos are basically just giant nocturnal cows that eat only grass.

[weaselle]

most animals that start adapting to live more of their lives in water:

"i must grow my bones lighter and less dense so that i don't get trapped on the bottom and may float easier in this new environment"

hippos: "denser. heavier bones. MOAR dense. Make sink the most."

mother nature: but how will you get off the bottom when you sink?

hippos: Make muscles more too, give all muscle.

mother nature: and to stay warm in the water? a big layer of fat?

hippos: no! no fat only muscle.

mother nature: o....kay. And, you eat aquatic plants, that's why you spend so much time in the water?

hippos: lol no. eat land grass, like cow.

mother nature: i see. right. You eat mostly grass, so, flat grinding teeth?

hippos: hell no. big spike teeth. sharp big teeth. Biggest

mother nature: what, like lions? 3 inch fangs?

hippos: course not. giant fuck-off teeth, 18 inches. Also, not just one pair, three pairs of giant sharp teeth. give

mother nature: but you eat... grass?

hippos: yeah. lol. Sometimes eat a zebra tho. Or a antelope. Maybe eat a crocodile, you don't know. Give all teeth, giant fuck-off teeth. Most bone! most muscle! most teeth! Me.

mother nature: y'know what? fuck it, sure, here you go

hippo: ...

hippo: i'm very angry now

[weaselle]

so idk about layers, and they are not all the same size, but they have three pairs of large sharp teeth on each side of their mouth, or you could say six pairs of ...? anyway they have a bunch of molars you can barely see through the gums, and then they have these teeth:

looks like this in the mouth

so those are their, yeah i guess actually six pair of giant fuck-off teeth

[mythopoeticlicense]

They're less teeth and more of a defensive stockade

[quelmdn]

[minnow-doodle-doo]

The comic I did for the @gothamhorrorzine

[fruitgravies]

the failure(s); the many loves of the vampire lestat

prints • insta • twt

[lizleeships]

POV: Your Eldritch husband thinks you go on too many business trips

(Yes it's me, I'm back on my bullshit. Feel free to partake here or here)

[jasper-rolls]

like, i’m pretty sure tiktok has existed for longer than vine did at this point but i’m yet to actually see an “iconic” tiktok. like people always caption like “this tiktok is ICONIC” but i’ve never seen one stay in the public consciousness for any longer than the 2 minutes it appears on my timeline. i never see people quote tiktoks or like, act them out with their friends or anything, not a single tiktok i’ve seen has had any actual staying power

meanwhile i can just say like “ROAD work ahead?” and i would bet a good chunk of you have just read that in the guy’s voice. i still see people tag things like “i wish i was jared, 19″. one night at the bar where i work we started an impromptu dance party purely by saying “hi, i’m renata bliss, and i’ll be your freestyle dance teacher”

i guess brevity really is the soul of wit

[jasper-rolls]

everyone calling me a boomer for this take has confirmed for me that people literally don’t know what boomer means

[dogwithpants]

Actually there is ONE iconic tiktok and it’s the ps5 boy

[kart0]

shit talking together

[sisyphusunderthesun]

[merrimentsmight]

U dont understand i had to write the first 70,000 words because if i didnt the sex wouldnt be as perilous or emotionally fraught. Which is the POINT.

[nevetoizhizni]

hey halfy

[cutecutejames]

[pipmer]

@educatedinyellow