Noodle

Ana 🦊

[thesevenumbrellas]

Lawyer: How would you like to handle the custody agreement?

Parent: I want my wife to take one of my infant daughters to the UK and I’ll take the other one and we will never see each other again.

Lawyer: You want to fucking what?

[dogpuppy]

[bakersfield-row]

[fairycosmos]

what’s the big deal about being avoidant. like ohhhh im dodging the bullet quick everyone lets mock the bullet dodger

[tomb-mold]

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

[pippastrelle]

Penelope: Yeah, this shroud is taking me 20 years.

Suitors:

[theweirdwideweb]

[freebroccoli]

REGRET TO INFORM YOU YOUR SON HAS DIED FROM TRENCH FOOT LOL HE SERVED WITH COURAGE AND HONOR LOL PLEASE ACCEPT OUR DEEPEST CONDOLENCES LOL

[kosmogrl]

[penandinkprincess]

parenting commitment level 3000

[penandinkprincess]

apparently a requirement for working at poison control is a talent for stand-up comedy

[starsarefairylightsfornerds]

[aqueerkettleofish]

When I was training to be a paramedic, we had one student ask the instructor what to do in the event of a marijuana overdose. The instructor said "Tell him to take two twinkies and call you in the morning."

[goldensunset]

>‘this thing is too generic and tropey’

>look inside

>forefather of that genre

[firestorm09890]

[frankbelloriley]

[kosmogrl]

oooh I get it it’s always gonna be because of the environment I grew up in

[aceofpans]

it’s because of the curse

[1anonyymous1]

the cool thing about this app is you’re never the craziest one here

[thebuffyfiles]

[dormouseking]

This is what being over 25 on this website feels like

[contemptible-scoundrel]

fuuuck I could use a mysterious benefactor right now

[animentality]

[hikarisakurariver]

Your middle aged Aunts lead the first online charge for yaoi and your great Aunts lead the first conventions for fandoms and wrote yaoi fanfiction on paper. (It just wasn’t called that at the time)

Sometimes they didn’t even show anyone. Sometimes they showed a few fellow fans.

You simply live now, following in their footsteps path they laid.

[minkhollow42]

On a related note, passed my way by a friend:

[xbeautifulxgarbage]

[misscromwellsmonocle]

The Little Art Connoisseur (1863) August Friedrich Siegert

[darnitjack]

Last time this came around I showed my three year old and he said "He's little like me!" and stared for a whole minute (v. Long in toddler time).

[calcazars]

let it be known that i touch grass frequently and I’m still like this.