bloated hippos

Alex//20//They/Them// i just want to shitpost and pretend my life isn't falling apart

[goth-queen]

[catchymemes]

[pookydookie]

Me procrasting the Very Important Task

[pukicho]

Kid called me a bonerhead so I vaporized all seven billion billion billion of his atoms

[pookydookie]

Is that a dog leash??? Did you vaporise the dog ??? ?????

[turns-out-its-adhd]

Welp, here come the consequences

[pookydookie]

Well well well if it isn't the consequence to my actions

[ready--freddie-deactivated20240]

hey what the fuck

[dcigenehunt-deactivated20231112]

Climbing the walls rn btw

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

hello my foul little beasties, i am taking a (hopefully brief) hiatus to deal with some health & personal issues. in the meantime here are some terrible awful no good wholesome fun facts i've been meaning to share:

bone china is called bone china bc yes it contains bones!

i'm not saying that autistic bees exist but autistic bees exist

for 15 years sweden thought russian submarines were invading its waters; it turned out to be herrings farting

cows have regional accents

sometimes massive fields of ice eggs wash up on beaches. literally just ice shaped like eggs. that is a thing that sometimes happens and i derive joy from this peculiar world

[pookydookie]

Hey Gaud, I really hope you're doing good, but when you get back can you please elaborate on that first point ?????

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

[hoffstrahm]

They are soooo normal <3

[metalslugx-deactivated20220413]

The clown, after sucking me off, proceeds to pull the multicolored rags out from my weenie while I clap in joyful glee

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

"they're only saying that to upset you" yes that is what I find so upsetting

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

alternatively: "they're not doing it to hurt you." and yet the action itself is inherently hurtful. when you trod on my foot, do my toes give a damn about your best or worst intentions? is my pinky toe distracted by the moral musings of your soul? no, it throbs and breaks and bends regardless. so watch where you step bitch

[pookydookie]

who hurt you today, Gaud?

[eelizabit]

men b like wow I’ve never met a girl who liked music before..

[hergraveyard]

You obviously know nothing about men if this is what you think they say

[auckie]

Men will see a mouse and eat it

[hergraveyard]

No they won’t because why would anyone eat a mouse that’s stupid not all men are bad and not all men are stupid you may have had a bad experience with a man but not all men are bad granted there bad men but instantly accusing all men as bad is immature I’m dating a man and he is nowhere near stupid and I know for a fact that he won’t eat a mouse and in pretty sure I could name at least five other men that won’t do something as immature as that and saying that a man will see a mouse and eat it won’t get you a anywhere with a man if anything it will drive them away.

[auckie]

A man will see a mouse and be like is anyone else gonna eat this and not wait for an answer

[evilkaito]

this post started 5th wave feminism

[discogranny]

girls night

[pookydookie]

m n the girls having a selfcare night after lockdown

[avvocarlo]

high speed clownload

[saltwaffle]

full offense but none of you would have ever survived fanfiction.net in 2009

[jetru]

remember when writers had to be all like: “omg omg lemon starts HERE” y’all are lucky that ao3 has tags and filters you can set

[domicileensnared]

Sometimes shit was marked “lemon” and it’d just be them making out, and sometimes they’d just start pissing on each other

No rules, no laws, you took your life into your hands opening fics

[frostyemma]

A/N: this contains SLASH, that means TWO MEN, if that makes you uncomfy, DON’T READ!

A/N: please don’t sue me, o anime overlords, I’m not making any money off of this! I’m just a broke student! I don’t have any money!

A/N: I totally wrote this while high off 10 Red Bulls wheeeeeee!!!!!

A/N: COMMENT if you want me to continue the next chappy!!!

[raimagnolia]

No, no, no

remember when there’d be interactions with the author and the characters?

InuYasha: I don’t get why I have to be here for this

A/N: Because it was in your contract!!1!1 *revs chainsaw*

[janekfan]

god those were lawless times. 

[the-apocryphal-one]

[kaijuno]

some of my favorite boat names floating around the suez

[maryjblige]

[pookydookie]