A Wandering Enthusiast

Grace. She, 30, 🏳️‍🌈, USA 🍉 Don't worry, the kpop is on my other blog (oh-hi-mark-lee). 30% assorted fandom obsession (F1, Crit Role, hockey etc), 70% memes, and 100% running away from responsibilities. got that environmental degree right as the earth burst into flames.

[sailermoon]

james baldwin was so right when he said “the children are always ours, every single one of them, all over the globe; and I am beginning to suspect that whoever is incapable of recognizing this may be incapable of morality.”

[pigcatapult]

You’ve heard of competing access needs. Now consider:

Competing representation needs.

[pigcatapult]

But no, seriously. This is one of the biggest things that pits people against each other in fandom spaces.

You’ve got people who need stories where men get to have completely platonic deep friendships with other men, need stories where men can be affectionate and support each other emotionally without it having to be romance. You’ve also got people who need stories about men being romantic with men. Both of these are valid. Whether either is canon doesn’t really matter because transformative works are allowed to be transformative and transformative works are works in their own right. It’s right there in the name.

But because there can only be One True Fanon, instead of acknowledging that different people have different needs and taking a live-and-let-live approach, you usually end up with both groups fighting to throw the other one under the bus first for trying to “steal” their representation.

Please no Oppression Olympics clowning on this post. Everyone needs stories. It’s an immutable part of the human condition.

[alexseanchai]

the only thing I disagree with in this post is “you’ve heard of competing access needs”, because in my experience, approximately nobody has, and most of the people who have are themselves disabled

(so nobody leaves this post without knowing what competing access needs are: the thing where movie subtitles are important for people with hearing loss or auditory processing issues, useless to people with vision loss, and can easily distract other people from the action. the thing where movie descriptive audio is important for people with vision loss, useless to people with hearing loss or auditory processing issues, and can easily distract other people from the action. et cetera and so forth.)

the other thing that worries me about both groups you describe is, zero of these people seem able to enjoy stories that aren’t entirely for them, which is sad, and zero of these people seem to know where to find the back button should they happen upon a fic that turns out to be really not for them, which is aggravating to everyone else and can’t be much fun for them either

and the crowd that first goes “if you want stories with [thing they don’t like], write your own”, then turns up when their addressees do in fact write their own just to say “ew, why is this so [thing they don’t like]”, can fuck altogether the fuck off

[pigcatapult]

akfah;gadj;lkfd you got me there

[farkenshnoffingottom]

Competing access needs are also why it’s important to have a bunch of different kinds of things. Like, a building that only has stairs is going to be inaccessible to a lot of people. But if it has stairs, a ramp, escalators, and an elevator (depending on the size of the building), so many more people will have access. I’ve always had a major fear of elevators, and I often find myself using the stairs even when my body can’t take it, so an escalator would give me better access. However, someone in a wheelchair would likely take the elevator instead of the escalator because it fits their chair better. The more options there are available, the more people are going to be able to access something: our competing needs shouldn’t mean that only one of us gets to exist. It should mean we expand the possibilities so we all get to be in the building, even if we take different paths to move through it.

Why shouldn’t we expect that in media? The answer to “we need representation” shouldn’t be “only perfect representation [which is very subjective, with everyone having a different definition of what that would even be] is allowed. Everything else is offensive.” It should instead be “more representation means more aspects of our experiences are shown.”

The “oh no I definitely can’t be gay, it’s time for some self-loathing” story is real for a lot of people, and can be very important to see represented. But I don’t want it to be all the stories I see. The “I’ve always known I was gay and I’ve never had a problem with it” story is real for a lot of people, and can be very important to see represented. But I don’t want it to be all the stories I see.

The more kinds of stories we let people tell, the more we will be able to find ourselves represented

[whyenn-reader]

''what if you regret it'' then you will expirience regret - a normal and unavoidable part of the human expirience.

[cowboyhatesithere]

I’LL CRY

[princessidequest]

Was at the Sharks sidewalk sale this afternoon and saw no fewer than five people walk up to a pile of Evander Kane shirts, pick one up, go “ugh!” and immediately put it down.

Good job, Sharks fans.

[sandmandaddy69]

[sahonithereadwolf]

I want to see the vampire who lives in this. I bet his name is Chad or Hunter.

[marlynnofmany]

And he's ready to crack open a boy with the cold ones.

[cipheramnesia]

You know he's slorshin' in it

[asterosian]

“Do trans men belong in women’s spaces?” I hate the phrasing of that question entirely. It’s secretly multiple questions disguised as one while using a vague term that serves no purpose other than to lead someone to a specific conclusion.

So let’s rephrase it.

“Do trans men belong in women’s spaces clinics that offer services meant for those with vaginas, uteruses, etc?” If they have the relevant anatomy that needs care, then obviously yes. I’m sorry, do you want trans men to get cancer and die because it went undetected too long? Because that’s how you get trans men to get cancer and die because it went undetected too long. Also, why is that space considered a women’s space to begin with and why should we let it stay that way?

“Do trans men belong in women’s spaces feminist advocacy groups fighting for abortion rights?” Yes because leaving trans men out means the people writing the law can simply forget trans men exist and write it in such a way where some asshole familiar with the law can use the exact wording to justify denying necessary care to a trans man because he is a trans man. If the law says “no woman should be denied access to abortion care…” and the trans man is legally a man, he will find himself in the same situation as the trans man who gets that phone call from his insurance saying “hey, sorry, but since you’re a man, we’re not covering that pap smear and you will be charged the full amount.” Not just in terms of paying either. “If you were a real man, you wouldn’t need an abortion. Come back after you fix your documents so they indicate you’re a female, but like, maybe motherhood would fix you so. Idk not my problem anymore. Goodbye!”

“Do trans men belong in women’s spaces lesbian book clubs or whatever?” They’re probably already there anyway and they’re not causing any problems just by being men in what is traditionally a women’s only thing. Plus, chances are they’ve been there since before coming out as trans so you’d just be kicking him out for coming out. I don’t have to explain to anyone why that’s kind of messed up, right?

“Do trans men belong in women’s spaces Should we kick people out of our arbitrarily female-only group if they come out as trans?” I guess I have to explain after all. It’s not gender validating for us to be suddenly ejected from every space we’ve found friends in before. You’re punishing someone for being trans. That’s all they did, was be trans.

[red-garden]

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

[pre-apocalypse-now]

So the larger contract now, smaller contract later for the Stanley cup push is what Crosby and Mcdavid did?

So it has a 50% chance of working? 🙃😅😭

[pre-apocalypse-now]

Someone with better hockey knowledge pls tell me if we are screwed or not on cap space 😅😅😅

[advantagealcaraz]

people think that people who hate sports would hate sports but actually no one hates sports more than people who love sports

[hadesisqueer]

Two World Cup finalists from opposing teams in this fucking picture, this sport isn't real

[hadesisqueer]

Context for anyone who is wondering: Lamine Yamal's parents won an UNICEF raffle for a charity photoshoot in which Barça players posed with kids, and 5 month old Lamine happened to get 20yo Messi. Which is like. Literally insane

[joyflameball]

[onyxbird]

Uh oh, buddy, did you dip the entire baby in the good-at-soccer water? You didn't think ahead and leave, e.g., his heel, mediocre at soccer just in case?

[pre-apocalypse-now]

Maybe that’s what the Argentinian team was going for when they were tripping the shit out of him : his Achilles 🤷‍♀️

[sunsbleeding]

[thesunnahthebetter]

[weirdlandtv]

Cartoon by John O'Brien for NEW YORKER magazine, 1991.

[moonshynecybin]

have you guys ever seen a crocodile with its fingies out

[moonshynecybin]

[devilishdescent]

[pre-apocalypse-now]

[lala-lili-lulu]

[pre-apocalypse-now]

Had a sudden bout of like face blindness and at first I thought it was a joke where every position was replaced with a will or Mack clone.

..And then for another sec I couldn’t tell them apart like contestants on the bachelorette lol