Programming is Gay

Programming from the perspective of a gay man... what the hell does that even mean?

[flowerbleedme]

My incredibly bleak philosophy of compassion is that we should all pity each other horribly and practice an according amount of kindness.

[flowerbleedme]

I asked for a pastry at the coffee shop. When I raised my card up to pay, he simply said "you're good." and waved it away. I wondered why. I wondered what made him think I deserved to have my order be free. Sparing me those two dollars.

Sitting down at the table, I remembered the scars on my arm. The universal signifier of "This Kid Needs Help." Maybe his kindness was only out of pity. He saw those and assumed there was some great misery and wanted to offer me some relief. It's generally good to be kind to people who are hurting. But I wasn't hurting that bad.

The thing is, there is some great misery. People generally aren't doing that great. There is a great misery within me and within him and within everyone, and some people notice the pain, some people express it, others don't. But we all suffer from something.

It doesn't matter if someone seems to deserve some relief. Everyone needs it. Everyone is suffering constantly. Some more than others, but still. This Kid Needs Help applies to everyone.

Thirty minutes later, I went to get a second pastry, intending to pay and leave a tip this time. It was the same cashier. As he reached to grab it for me, I saw scars on his arm.

But it doesn't really matter. He'd deserve a tip anyway. Because it's never just us hurting.

[homunculus-argument]

Artfully layering an axe bodyspray deodorant and two different perfume oils to create a tasteful mixture of amber, oud, mint, lavender, moss and petrichor, producing a scent that smells exactly like damp, stale, rotting laundry.

[dreamsareliminalspaces-deactiva]

Reminds me of that tumblr user that made powdered milk with sparkling water and created instant spoiled milk

[homunculus-argument]

That was also me.

[adeline-wheat]

Do you know any other ways to speed ruin things?

[homunculus-argument]

I wish I knew any other way to do anything.

[helenvaughans]

"crime" for conservatives is basically just existing in public as a person of color

[dragon-in-a-fez]

always thinking about that Oxford study that found half of adults define "young people hanging around in groups" as "anti-social behaviour"

[stantler-and-walrein]

>"anti-social behaviour"

>looks inside

>socialising

[teaboot]

>L'enfant plaza metro

>Les enfants

[thundergrace]

The only way to talk to these people.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT

[programmingisgay]

To be fair the Russians do land on land, and at the speeds of a falling capsule the ocean is basically solid.

[prokopetz]

It's striking how much mental health advice directed at kids and teenagers boils down to saying "you have to be okay with people treating you like you're not fully human because they're right, but it's okay because one day you will be human", then being genuinely surprised when it doesn't help.

[asteroidtroglodyte]

“Ugh can’t stand babies they cry so much!”

That tiny Human spirit has shat himself 4 times today if you’d shat yourself 4 times by noon you’d be in hysterics too

[asteroidtroglodyte]

He fell asleep in his bed, at home, and woke up at the goddamn grocery store with an overhead light in his face if that happened to you you’d become The Joker

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Poor guy’s only been here for like a dozen weeks he doesn’t even have a favorite show to distract him yet he’s just raw-dogging reality unfiltered with no goddamn Blorbos to rotate whatsoever

[scary-ivy]

Baby's first rotating blorbos

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Y’all are great I love y’all

[tineid]

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Everyone say “thank you crying baby”

[minecraft]

I'm at a :.|:; for words.

[shodaisatellite]

[mixelation]

things ppl often get wrong in academia AUs (specifically ones in modern university settings with focus on graduate students & professors):

no one is spending enough time complaining about writing

hierarchy is wrong. your grad student TA is not a professor or faculty and might not even be considered an employee. that 32 year old man is not a full professor no matter how talented he is or how old you think 30+ is, and he should be talking more about "the tenure clock"

grad students only ever taking or TAing classes & never doing research or working on their thesis/dissertation. there are masters programs with no thesis component so i'm sure there are ones that have no research requirement, but you can't get a PhD only taking classes

everyone has too much money. but also if it's set in the US there's an obsession with accumulating student debt for positions that generally you would not have to take out loans for

relationship with academic advisor never sufficiently unhinged

not enough discussion of stats where it's obvious everyone only barely understands what's happening

[mixelation]

"what is a sufficiently unhinged student-advisor relationship?"

link to the article

[sensibleshroom]

"I got so angry that ISIS was disrupting the research." -> Said on record to a journalist in the actual middle of an interview.

Yeah I think that's a sufficiently unhinged academic.

[catgirlforeskin]

I think RFK Junior's "I am declaring war on fat gay kids" might be the funniest thing anyone has ever said. Enlisting in the war on fat gay kids on the side of fat gay kids, it goes without saying

[foone]

justice and love and protection for all fat gay kids

[oldinterneticons]

[moveslikekeithrichards]

there is no greater joy on this earth than Making Lists, Categorizing, & Sorting

[flying-lemons]

oh do I have the game for you

[dancing-crow]

I could . not. put. this down for 48 hours - stayed up too late, had weird dreams about it, woke up early, and played it while I was supposed to be doing other things. the last several dozen items took a lot of googling, which I do not even begrudge it.

and then. My partner started it. And the SAME THING happened to him.

surprisingly compelling. start when you have free time. like, yanno, a snow day.

[foone]

oh my god, if you are the kind of person who gets sucked into logic puzzles, do not click that link if you have to do anything/go to sleep in the next couple hours

[programmingisgay]

Fucking nerd sniped…

[teaboot]

To this DAY the best argument I ever had with my father was when we were sitting together on the bus to work discussing unions, where HE said “Unions are expensive scams that produce lower quality work at half the speed, they’re bad for customers and bad for workers” and *I* replied “More money than you or I will ever make in our lives has been spent by CEOs of multibillion dollar industries who want to convince you that that’s true” and he called me a conspiracy theorist and like a fucking ‘everyone clapped’ ass moment an old man across the aisle from us pointed to me and told my old man “the kid’s right”

[teaboot]

Sooooooo many of society’s interpersonal issues could be solved by kicking the shit out of a man and calling him good boy 😔

AND ☝️ [!] joining a union

[teaboot]

actually in hindsight a shitload of my personal self-damaging habits died off when I started sparring at the gym and got work benefits so damn maybe w’re onto something here boys

[galileosballs]

I don't want to make light of the situation, but having the resistance movement against ICE galvanize around the killing of one person called 'Pretti' and one person called 'Good', while nearly the whole country is battling a major ice storm, is the sort of thing that would get a writer kicked out of the symbolism club.

[galileosballs]

Beauty and goodness, slain by ICE, as ice rains down around us all. Would be pretty hack stuff if it wasn't the truth.

[programmingisgay]

So god is a bad writer, got it.

[prokopetz]

I understand that you were aiming for a morally grey protagonist, but in practice what you've ended up with is more of a moral beige.

[prokopetz]

@ancient-tree-with-deathwish replied:

how do you distinguish grey from other colours beyond black and wite?

Distinguishing features of moral beige:

The protagonist is constantly agonising over Hard Choices; however, circumstances always conspire to prevent them from actually having to make those choices, so in practice they're just angsting over stuff they might have done.

The text exhibits a recurring pattern whereby the protagonist seems to to have made a Hard Choice, but new information is reliably revealed shortly thereafter which retroactively establishes that whatever they did was the morally upright course after all.

The protagonist's moral impulses are straightforwardly heroic, except in one specific context which lacks any clear real-world analogue; for example, being prejudiced against telepaths.

The protagonist's actions are consistently reasonable based on the information available to them – they're merely operating on bad information basically all the time due to a bizarre conspiracy and/or a series of increasingly implausible misunderstandings.

The protagonist always ends up doing the right thing (for some fuzzy value of "right"), but, like, they're really grumpy about it.

[programmingisgay]

Are expert systems any good at escape rooms?

[herzspalter]

Transformers has a lot of quotable lines, especially from the animated movie, but “I’ve heard it said that we only gain wisdom through suffering, and tonight I intend to make you very wise” is so fucking raw and needs more appreciation

[plasmaturian]

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

yoooooo

next handwritten book is gonna probably just be a book filled with these quotes lmao

[herzspalter]

This is such a good addition to this post oh my god I love this!!

[captaindrewboy]

I hate when I tell people I'm into Comp Sci and programming and they go "ooh there's a lot of money there". I'm not DOING it for the MONEY I'm DOING it because I want to FUCK the COMPUTER!!!!

[programmingisgay]

I want to have a rebuttal to this.