YOU ARE THE REASON
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Kiana Khansmith
hello vonnie

gracie abrams

if i look back, i am lost

blake kathryn
Fai_Ryy
Sade Olutola
Cosimo Galluzzi

ellievsbear
macklin celebrini has autism
d e v o n

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
EXPECTATIONS
taylor price
ojovivo
Jules of Nature
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸

â

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@puffinmuffin
Mutuals in different timezones:
Turn based friendship
Diver convince octopus to trade his plastic cup for a seashell
imagine if a fuckinâŚâŚ. giant alien just showed up and stuck a huge hand in front of your face and then proceeded to offer you three different houses and wouldnât stop until you moved out of your old shitty apartment and then helped you fuckin move
and then just left
I first saw this on twitter and COULD NOT get over these comments:
Twitter link
Before you are two magic buttons. Button A: you will never have to clean your kitchen again (dishes are automatically done; floor swept and mopped; etc). Button B: you will never have to clean your bathroom again (toilet & sink & tub/shower cleaned and sanitized; etc) Which button do you push?
A
B
So many comments, many of them wise and all of them heartfelt, and yet nobody has thought to add ...
the fridge-freezer is in the kitchen. Not only are there dishes every day, not only are there food preparation surfaces of various kinds every day, not only are there crumbs and odds and ends that fall on the floor every day ... but the fridge-freezer is in the kitchen. The oven is in the kitchen, the food cupboards are in the kitchen, and above all THE KITCHEN BIN IS IN THE KITCHEN.
I mean, it's not like the bathroom is all sweetness and light, but seriously! Who in their right mind is choosing the bathroom?!?!?!?
Ils sont fous, ces Romains tumblrains.
Having a magically-self-cleaning bathroom would be cool, but it wouldn't dramatically change my lifestyle.
If I could cook or bake whatever the hell I wanted, knowing that all my pots and mixing bowls and baking sheets would just zap themselves clean when I finished? If I knew that I could spill batter or grease inside the oven or burn things onto baking racks and it would just go away? I would be making delicious shit constantly.
from @baddywronglegs
#You can piss in the kitchen sink but you can't make lasagna in the shower
@theshitpostcalligrapher this one deserves to be writ large
yeag.....
âTeachers are often unaware of the gender distribution of talk in their classrooms. They usually consider that they give equal amounts of attention to girls and boys, and it is only when they make a tape recording that they realize that boys are dominating the interactions. Dale Spender, an Australian feminist who has been a strong advocate of female rights in this area, noted that teachers who tried to restore the balance by deliberately âfavouringâ the girls were astounded to find that despite their efforts they continued to devote more time to the boys in their classrooms. Another study reported that a male science teacher who managed to create an atmosphere in which girls and boys contributed more equally to discussion felt that he was devoting 90 per cent of his attention to the girls. And so did his male pupils. They complained vociferously that the girls were getting too much talking time. In other public contexts, too, such as seminars and debates, when women and men are deliberately given an equal amount of the highly valued talking time, there is often a perception that they are getting more than their fair share. Dale Spender explains this as follows: âThe talkativeness of women has been gauged in comparison not with men but with silence. Women have not been judged on the grounds of whether they talk more than men, but of whether they talk more than silent women.â In other words, if women talk at all, this may be perceived as âtoo muchâ by men who expect them to provide a silent, decorative background in many social contexts.â
â
PBS: Language as Prejudice - Myth #6: Women Talk Too Much (via misandry-mermaid)
Every EVERY womenâs studies class Iâve been in has had this problem and failed to address it.Â
(via iamayoungfeminist)
this is a poem. To me.
Iâm getting ads telling me to replace live porch flowers with plastic ones because the plastic ones donât die and buddy I can tell you from personal experience that those flowers will fade until they look like theyâve achieved a new kind of death
i read this to adam and he just yelled, outraged, "THEYRE BABIES"
TRUE HATERS, SINCE DAY 1 THEY HAVENT BEEN GIVING THEM A FUCKING INCH
this is next level
20 years later. you're kermit. opening night at the muppet theater. you look up. you can't believe it. those two awful cunts from next door are here. neither of them died yet. they're going to be here, forever.
They're immortal.
They were heckling the actors in Ford's theater on the day Lincoln was shot.
They heckled the first reading of the Epic of Gilgamesh.
They heckled the first lifeform to crawl onto land.
They heckled the big bang.
"They say that time exists now."
"I can tell."
"How so?"
"Because this show is a waste of it!"
"DOHOHOHOHOHO!"
I always think of the description I saw years ago: Self-imposed deadlines don't help me, because I know the person who set them, and they're full of shit.
Give yourself the treat before you start. I'm serious. And ideally during the task and afterwards too.
Executive dysfunction comes from a lack of available dopamine. Common advice is wrong. You need to provide your own dopamine before you can start. Otherwise you're trying to run your car on empty.
"But what if I still don't do it" well you already weren't getting it done anyway. Now you have a little treat. Try again later.
You deserve kindness and care even when you aren't being productive.
(Also read How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis)
I give my students a LOT of techniques for starting writing when it feels overwhelming or daunting, but one of them is exactly this: dopamine load BEFOREHAND. It may sound weird to people on tumblr dot com, but a lot of people seriously struggle with executive dysfunction when it comes to writing literally anything, to the extent that it can cause such symptoms as panic, depression, and AI chatbot use.
I usually suggest this technique as a "Reverse Pomodoro." In the original Pomodoro, you work for 25 minutes and then take a break for 5 minutes (the times vary, but that's the essential ratio). People with executive dysfunction often find this insurmountable, and they get even more frustrated, and then the task seems even more difficult. So instead, flip those times.
FIRST, spend 25 minutes doing something energizing and engaging that you like to do. Not scrolling social media passively, not watching tv, not napping. Try something like colouring, doing yoga, running/walking around the block, talking about your favourite tv show with someone in real time, playing with the dog or cat, making and eating a lovely sandwich, hula hooping, something active. Having a little treat absolutely falls in this category!
(on the subject of little treats: refusing yourself food until you do work is for fucking Puritans and you can be kinder to yourself)
Then, after 25 minutes (or however long it takes to eat the sandwich or finish the yoga routine, it doesn't have to be exact), spend 5 minutes writing (or doing whatever you're struggling to start). Most people can coax themselves into doing something they find difficult for five minutes, if they have already filled up the joy/energy/engagement bucket. You can put a timer on for the 5 minutes if you want, or if you find that annoying, just work for as long as you like.
The other key is: don't push yourself to keep going when you're frustrated or tiredâthat will just reinforce the negative belief that you already have, which tells you that this task is painful to do, and needs to be avoided. If you've commonly had to force yourself to do this kind of task, that's likely part of why you think of it as painful and have trouble starting it now. Also, you should just, at a basic level, try not to put yourself in pain for the sake of productivity. So just do it till the good feelings run out. Then start hula hooping or colouring again for another 25 minutes. When the tank's refilled, try another 5 minutes of work, if you can. Adjust times to taste.
Not every technique works for everyone, but I've seen this one work for many students who are genuinely and seriously disabled by executive dysfunction. And many people find themselves getting more and more excited and engaged in the "difficult" taskâbecause the good feelings from the hula hooping carry over, and because they're suddenly able to do the task without feeling pain, and feel accomplishment without feeling pain.
As someone who was alive when Bob Ross (and William Alexander before him â thatâs where the approach is from) was on PBS, I can 100% testify that you can paint along with him.
You may need to learn how to set up your paints and such⌠but this is what people did, live, while the show aired. Thatâs what the show was for. I had family members create lovely works of art they enjoyed, which I still have on my walls, because William Alexander and Bob Ross both said:
SCREW METICULOUS CLASSICAL ART PRACTICES â JUST GRAB A PALETTE KNIFE AND BIG OLD BRUSH AND PAINT!
They freed a whole generation of people who were taught to paint detail and realism and exact representation of reality â people who largely gave up this kind of thing because it got tedious.
I watched the joy of family members as they rediscovered art as a messy fun spontaneous half hour activity.
Give it a try.
I'm so old i remember when people liked using Windows
That's because they stuck these bad boys to them
Oh wow, that IS better.
also at the end when they ask you "any questions?" and you can't think of anything: ask about parking. even if you don't have a car.
I have an interview today in a couple hours, how did the algorithm know I needed this
Btw when they ask if you have questions some actual good options are stuff like âwhatâs a typical day like in this roleâ or âis this job open because someone is leaving or is this a new positionâ
Another good question I stole from a reddit post that has really impressed all interviewers (two job offers!) is: "let's say you hire me and in a year you're thinking you made a really great choice. What will I have done to make you think that?"
It gets them talking about what they're looking for in the role, thinking about how you could fit it, and lets you end the interview getting to reiterate how good you would be for the role and how enthusiastic you are for it.
If you get the 'tell me about yourself' I've actually had at least one interview where they want to know about you as a person.
It might be worth asking them "Do you mean professionally, to get an idea of my work, or personally to see how I'll fit into the workplace culture?"
i have a suggestion
My preferred "any questions" question is, "What kind of person thrives here?" Which is a good way of getting them to tell you about the workplace culture without asking directly, and will often reveal red flags about their expectations if there are any.
My favorite end of interview question because it leaves the interviewer in an "up" mood - "What's your favorite thing about your job?"
Sam Neill has sadly passed away at the age of 78.
the fact that tangled has a perfect set-up for major miscommunication between rapunzel and eugene to be the final emotional climax of the movie (âwhyâd you leave meâ) but instead sidesteps that in favor of a beautiful battle between the two of them in which they try to out-sacrifice each other because they love and understand each other that much. the fact that they each try to save the other using the best means theyâve got at their disposal, the ones theyâve used their whole lives: rapunzel bargaining with mother gothel and promising away pieces of herself- this time all of herself- in exchange for his safety, Eugene pulling one final scam and trick when he feigns tenderly touching her face so he can actually cut off all her hair and set her free. the fact that Eugeneâs plan works but as a result he dies, Flynn dies. (he told us this at the beginning, âthis is the story of how I diedâ but remember- itâs a fun story.) The fact that the swashbuckling rogue and trickster and thief Flynn DIES so that rapunzel, the girl who never got to have a life, can LIVE. The fact that after one final successful trick Flynn dies so Eugene, little lost orphan boy, can rise again in his final and only role as a good man and as rapunzelâs husband- all of these make tangled the masterpiece it is. in this essay I will
OP whereâs the essaaaaay
What unites Eugene and Rapunzel, what forms the basis of their connection, is not just their lonely, isolated, unloved childhoods but the mechanisms they each used and still use to try to fill the voids in their lives. And those mechanisms boil down to- keeping busy, whatever the cost. Rapunzelâs opening song is literally a montage of her desperate attempts to fill an otherwise empty day (and empty life) and Eugene steals for the riches, sure, but mostly for the adventure, the thrill, the chase. The motion and color of it and the ways in which it is the opposite of boredom, the opposite of emptiness.Â
They are both resourceful and determined, used to doing the best they can with what they have, and as a result they encounter each other and decide to team up. Practicality, not romance, is what drives them together and what keeps them together for much of the movie.
Their methods of filling voids with whatever scheme they can concoct, the skills theyâve both gained from their past experiences, become the means they use to achieve their shared goal: get Rapunzel to the city to watch the floating lights and return her safely home. The scrapes and (mis)adventures they get into on their way are not just filler or fluff; they are opportunities to highlight the natural teamwork they have, the ways in which they complement and complete each other and so help each other: Rapunzel solves the run-in with the group of thugs/misfits with vulnerability and openness; together, they escape from the guards and avoid drowning.Â
Already this is an improvement on their previous work, their previous âbusinessâ. It has more warmth, it has more success, it has more color. But thatâs not all. Alongside their adventures, they start to talk to each other. Confide in each other. Nothing huge or dramatic. When he tells her his name he follows it with the dryly delivered âsomeone might as well knowâ. And when he asks about the situation at home, his voice is gentle and kind but not full of depth of feeling just yet. But itâs real, honest connection about their pasts and so contains within it the articulation of their emptiness. Itâs the realest relationship either of them have ever had. Itâs far realer than anything their past endeavors have ever brought them.
When they reach the lights, Rapunzel realizes this and it comes out in her words expressing her fears and worries about the lights. Understandably, sheâs scared finally seeing the lights wonât be enough. But then, and hereâs the beautiful thing, sheâs scared that it will be. âAnd what if it is,â she says, tears in her eyes and voice. âWhat then?â This is the moment in which Rapunzel recognizes that she really has never filled the void in her life, the place where real love and human connection should be, and that the lights wonât do it either. Chasing the lights was her noblest effort yet, a beautiful and real and a valid dream, but still not enough. because the lights are not a person and the lights canât love her back.Â
Eugeneâs answer to this is hopeful- thereâs always another dream to chase. But he still doesnât really have an answer for her. He doesnât really understand.
Until they see the lights.Â
Until they see the lights together.Â
Their golden glow and beauty is enchanting, itâs everything she dreamed it would be. And then, itâs more.Â
And itâs more because when she turns around, right at the end of the first verse, she sees him. Holding her dream in her hands, watching her watch it, experiencing it with her.Â
Thatâs when she knows.Â
She hands him the satchel and he knows he knows too.Â
He knows that there is no new dream, no better dream, than her, than a real life of love with the person in front of him.Â
After the lights happens everything I said in the original post. Theyâre torn apart and beautifully, magically, unexpectedly Mother Gothelâs ploy to sow discord between them doesnât work. Rapunzel sees through Mother Gothelâs lie to see the truth of everything, including his reasons for leaving, and when he shows up there is no reproach or misunderstanding to clear away. Like I said in my original post, they understand each other now.Â
And like I said in the post above, Rapunzelâs bargaining for his life and Eugeneâs cutting off of her hair are the means they use to set the other free. And ultimately Eugene wins. He dies and his death, the first time she truly experiences loss, opens her up to a fuller understanding of and use of her magic and her healing. He is restored to her and they live (truly) happily ever after.
But my point with all of this is, the heart of the story and its own specific magic, is that their skills and habits and means- whatever the word we want to use is- garnered by each of their efforts to fill their life with meaning finally fulfilled their true purpose, finally made them happy. Because they stopped being the end goal of their lives and became the means to their true purpose- the life and love they have with each other.Â