Stories About Nothing

The inner thoughts and monologue of another clod working to figure all this stuff out. I'm pansexual and pro bisexuality. please fuck off with panphobia. fuck terfs and punch a nazi today. ask if you need something tagged

[typhlonectes]

[cryptotheism]

I always wanted to be the guard that tells only lies

[cryptotheism]

I mean I've actually never wanted to be that.

[cryptotheism]

Stupid stupid stupid. C'mon. At this rate I'll never be a lie guard.

[tlirsgender]

Do you think it's like a rite of passage for every new generation of xmen to momentarily feel like it's kind of fucked up to be trying to kick the shit out of a senior citizen until magneto crumples someone into a cube like a trash compactor in front of them and they're just like Oh Ok

[tlirsgender]

On the one hand I'm sure everyone else is very heavily emphasizing that magneto is Theee big bad of all time and so on and so forth the whole time the new ones are training but also. Like. Imagine you're the new new new mutants or whatever and somebody manages to actually knock magneto over and he stays on the ground for a second and you're kind of looking at each other like. Guys isn't he *really* old what if we just killed magneto & then the entire city starts shaking while he's getting back on his feet & you're like ohhh he's just REALLY ANGRY now. Ok :) oh that's bad :/ oh shit. Uh oh

[tlirsgender]

[ID: tags from @transguyhawkeye that read, "#having a panic attack over whether you just broke magnetos hip meanwhile he just separated wolverine into recycling and organics for the #third time this week" /end ID]

[byjove]

could you imagine if it happened this pride month

[proteusolm]

a lick of yoghurt for the smallest and youngest animal on earth

[the-haiku-bot]

a lick of yoghurt

for the smallest and youngest

animal on earth

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[codecicle-archive]

queer people on this site really make me feel like a confused straight guy at pride. the discourse here could kill a man

[codecicle-archive]

"why polyamorous people aren't valid" "mspec lesbians AREN'T okay actually" "aroallos are freaks" "he/him dni. cis men dni" "this post is for non-men only" yessss and the one with long hair goes in the girl box, then the one with short hair goes in the boy box!!

[codecicle-archive]

maybe I'm just a boring he/him white guy but inventing about 7 trillion terms to define "man" and "woman" so you can reinforce gender essentialism isn't very "love is love" of you. maybe i just don't have a sexuality but picking and choosing what sexualities are normal and which ones are "weird and predatory" sounds like we're all a bunch of republicans on fox news. if you attend your local pride parade and look REAAALLLYYY closely, you'll notice you can't actually tell if someone's gay or not from their appearance, and there's no way to know if they're "invading queer spaces". maybe it's just me, but when i attended my local gaybar last night for the drag show, they didn't ask for my gay-card with a peer reviewed diagnosis of faggot stamped on it. they just let me in the building. i live a life of bliss and luxury in not caring about any queer discourse ever, and just going "WHATEVER MAKES YOU HAPPY :-)" while booting up the latest cod game. and it seems much more fun than whatever the fuck you people are on about

[codecicle-archive]

muting my notifs for this post but i need to acknowledge this first. My favorite tags fr 🙏

[shamebats]

Oh come on lady, you can't deny a man his gaycation

[shamebats]

You must surrender yourself mind, body and soul to the gaycation or be destroyed

[shamebats]

Someone on reddit already suggested a sapphibbatical

[the-haiku-bot]

Someone on reddit

already suggested a

sapphibbatical

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[mechanica1-hands]

how could you leave out the best part—the aquarium bit

[shamebats]

"become a fish" (gay)

[ladyananas]

men will jump through an entire circus' worth of hoops rather than admitting they're bi

[helpless--romantics]

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

The level of mental hoops that guy had to jump through to say to his wife, "No, honey! Of course I wouldn't be cheating on you! Sex during gaycations doesn't count!"

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

Holy fucking shit! It gets trippier!

I mean, I feel horrible for the OP and her SIL...but "surrender to the gaycation" made me laugh way more than I should have.

[emilynyaaa]

this is an insane story

[flickering-leaves]

“Some men never return”

Helpppppp 😭

[brightlotusmoon]

[harperhug]

Um…here’s the reddit link? I’m speechless.

[handageddon]

Don't worry honey, all the other men on gaycation aren't real people and they stop existing after. Hey, where's all the homophoboa coming from suddenly?

[mananabuffins]

That's the beauty of the gaycation!

[authoratmidnight]

It get wilder. I only found out about this b/c of a youtube video reading the Gaycation post but, this isn't even the first one.

7 years ago someone posted this-

And 5 years a different user posted this-

What is happening with these people??? What weird ass cult did they find??

[3000s]

ocd will have me thinking i cant text "here now if you wanna head over" because i sound like blowjob mario with a walkie talkie

[3000s]

nobody thinks this way, you are a broken person

[intlbipolar]

[drtanner]

This post is almost 11 years old now, so I feel like it’s time for an update:

[everythingfox]

He’s a baby

[earhartsease]

collaborative installation

[lakevida]

i think its charming when peoples personal lives improve and they get drastically worse at posting

[teaboot]

“Why are you scared of dating” I’m not scared of dating, I just haven’t found anyone’s company to be more enjoyable than my own. And also I don’t care

[justlightmeonfire]

I just don't want anyone to steal my very cursed amulet

[teaboot]

Also the amulet

[whimsicalmayhem]

Is that you talking? Or the amulet? Are you SURE a new hand doesn't want to touch the beacon?

[teaboot]

The amulet and I are not currently looking for a third

[madeofklay]

I saw this perfectly in my head and had to recreate it

[teaboot]

Holy Shit

[importantcatpics]

[chortlebot]

before someone screenshots this and posts it elsewhere this is me

[cerastes]

People don’t even say w00t anymore.

[cerastes]

This sux00rz…

[not100bees]

Yeah sorry I can't come into work today. I accidentally heard Primadonna by Marina formerly of and the Diamonds. So I need the day to be a primadonna girl. Yeah it's going to be the whole day.

[nixpunk]

[slopmaster9000]

childaborting hips