a random assortment of nonsense

Tanja 🌙|🇫🇮 |MD 🇺🇸 |they/she| bi & genderfluid| not white, don’t try me. no terfs allowed

[queentangerine]

I write sometimes. Emphasis on sometimes.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[animentality]

[swarnpert]

*right clicks on you*

[swarnpert]

*views your properties*

[gummiehell]

[dogpuppy]

[perlukafarinn]

List of Shane Hollander's crushes:

Prince Eric in The Little Mermaid.

Patrick Swayze, specifically in Dirty Dancing because his mom would watch that movie whenever it came on and nine year old Shane would join her, watching with an innocent but fixed fascination he usually only ever showed for hockey related things.

Li Shang in Mulan.

An 8th grade classmate who occasionally told the other boys to knock it off when they made jokes at Shane's expense. He had that 90s popular boy curtain bangs haircut and Shane would sometimes fantasize about brushing the hair away from his face.

The boy who was the Captain of his U15 team the year he joined. Confused it for hero worship. He had a habit of ruffling Shane's hair and of teasing him in a way that sometimes crossed the line from affectionate to mean. Both gave Shane butterflies.

Scott Hunter, also confused for hero worship.

A 12th grade classmate who was on the basketball team and who always stood just a little bit too close whenever he talked to Shane, forcing Shane to crane his neck to look up at him.

Ilya Rozanov, unfortunately.

Carter Vaughn. He's cute, he's friendly, and he throws his arm around Shane's shoulders whenever they meet.

Ilya Rozanov, still.

A photographer who takes Shane's pictures for one of his many brand deals and is a little more hands-on than most, without touching Shane in any way that could be construed as inappropriate. Tells Shane "good job, kid, you're a natural" once the shoot is over, his voice warm and deep.

His boyfriend, Ilya Rozanov.

J.J. Boiziau, after J.J. takes him out to a gay club post Shane coming out and forces him onto the dancefloor with him. This crush is swiftly snuffed out the next week when J.J. tosses his socks at him in the locker room and the smell nearly knocks Shane out cold.

His husband, Ilya Rozanov ❤️

[perlukafarinn]

#i think shane is absolutely the type of person to tell ilya he has a crush on him#like i'm talking they're on their literal honeymoon after getting married#curled in bed together enjoying the afterglow#and shane turns and looks at ilya and goes#ilya i have a crush on you#and ilya is filled with a cuteness aggression so strong he literally goes to bite shane's cheeks#which just makes shane more blushy and flustered#and he's like#ilya im serious you still give me butterflies im still stuck staring at you when we're in a room together#stop laughing!#because ilya only pauses nibbling and kissing at shane's cheeks to laugh and tease#and when he pulls away he looks at shane and goes#shane i have a crush on you too#and he's blushing and shane points it out#and ofc ilya is like 'never in my life have i blushed russians do not do this'#while his cheeks are pink and he's giggling at his hubsnd#and how lucky are they both to marry their most beloved crushes

@unholyhollander no you get it they literally never stop crushing on each other, they've been married for years and still give each other butterflies <3

[noshowjones]

"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it

[neenarchive]

really hilarious and unsexy when hetero romantasy authors refer to love interests as males and females. you sound like david attenborough narrating a special documentary on two turtles humping in the mud

[neenarchive]

i don't care if he's the king of the fae. if that man called me a desirable female i'd have him gelded

[8nin]

I'm like if a missing person was literally right there

[koloocheh]

forget about touching grass, i need to touch THE SEA I NEED TO GO INTO THE WATER I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!

[vetchtibbles]

despite everything, it’s still you (derogatory)

[vetchtibbles]

wait hey man wait whoah hey

[the-big-mood]

Crazy this joke hasn't aged in almost 20 years since the episode aired

[segamascott]

america please just collapse already

[luxiomahariel]

[the-silliest46290]

How it feels to genuinely enjoy the Pitt and not get caught up on every little bad thing a character has done because they’re all complex human beings and none of them are truly evil like everyone in this fandom seems to think

[dyke-enjoying-media]

i love enjoying things with nuance and media literacy the pitt is truly an exercise in seeing people and characters in their entirety good and bad and some of you need to do this exercise more

[peachfromcmbyn]

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

[beardedmrbean]

this sounds like a party to me

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

[boiledegghole]

americans love doxxing their home states more than anything. we hear the name of our home state and everything goes black and we wake up 10 minutes later, having reblogged no fewer than 8 posts featuring the name of our home state

[captaindibbzy]

By @emilyscartoons