i wanted to share my thoughts on show rhaenyra. I hate to say it but show rhaenyra is just so vanilla and im saying it in the nicest possible way. where is her anger? her fury? her rage? her grief? she mentions luke only once & forgets visenya (her only daughter btw). she goes to meet alicent aka the enemy in the middle of war like she's going to a neighbor's house for dinner.....to talk about peace💀like what peace girl? also her lines "do you remember the tourney held on the day my mother died...we sat next to each other" idgaf if they were besties or that they were "secretly pinning for each other" or whatever bs rhaencients spew. ALICENT AND HER SIDE STILL USURPED YOU SIS WAKE UPPPPP MY GAWD!! alicent didn't think of yall friendship when she put that crown on her son's head, she didn't think of yall friendship when you were forced to walk all that way to her room carrying ur newborn 5 mins after you gave birth & she certainly didn't care about yall friendship when she wore that green dress on the day of ur wedding.
speaking of alicent...ofc they make her support the usurpation because of some misunderstanding and not because she actually wanted to see her son on the throne. what's so wrong in making her evil or give her agency? it would have been more interesting to see alicent evolve from this child bride forced into an unhappy marriage to a cruel, cold & shrewd woman who would move heavens and earth to get her boy on the throne even if it means getting blood on her hands. we see a glimpse of that in ep 6-7 of s1 and then nothing she goes back to being this passive uwu doe-eyed crybaby who can do nothing wrong. in ep 8 of s2, she hops on a ferry to dragonstone in hopes of reuniting with her long lost love rhaenyra & there she goes "ykw? my sons suck i only like my daughter. can we go on an adventure across the narrow sea?" which is just bizarre considering she was the one who browbeat aegon into being king and now she wants to just....escape the consequences??
with all these dogshit plot lines i can already imagine the show's ending. it will be alicent herself poisoning aegon's wine because he killed rhaenyra(and in extension his own sister) giving reasons like "he's gone too far" "I don't recognize you anymore my son, did I really give birth to a monster? " or sumn like that. and then we see a final shot of aegon iii & jaehaera getting married with alicent smiling in the distance or towards the end of her life when she gets the fever she hallucinate about rhaenyra and as she takes her last breath, she says "i hope it is not too late to accept your invitation about riding syrax and go across the narrow sea" with a tears streaming down her face.
Yep, this is what we call, benevolent sexism. The show thinks it's doing something, writing a story about female struggle in a feudal, patriarchal society. Except they forget one crucial thing—to write women as people.
Women are not the moral arbiters of the world. We're flawed, messy, inconsistent. We sometimes don't want to rise above, or be the better person; we want revenge, feel anger, jealousy, have ambition and hunger for power and status, same as any man. And most importantly, we're shaped by our social conditioning and the time we live in.
Book Rhaenyra, and Book Alicent aren't all that complex— especially book Alicent, who might as well be an evil Disney stepmom. But that's mostly because F&B is written as an in-universe history book instead of a POV rendition of the dance. We get to see third party accounts of these people, instead of their own voices, personalities, memories, experiences. And yet, despite this, you rarely, if ever have trouble understanding why these women act the way they do.
Book Alicent is a noble lady, raised in a patriarchal culture that drills into women that their only worth comes from marrying well, and birthing sons. They don't get power, or the same freedoms as men—but the tradeoff is that they might get their blood to inherit wealth and status, which in turn, gives them some sliver of respect and power.
Of course she's then going to feel upset that Viserys broke this unspoken social contract and decided to name a daughter over a son. Of course she's going to do whatever she can to claw back that power, feel jealousy, aggrieved entitlement and spite toward a woman who she thinks has it better than her. And most importantly, of course she's going to believe her children will be in danger if Rhaenyra ascends. Because in this worldview, women are lesser beings who exist below men in the hierarchy. Disrupting that order, and elevating a woman over a man is not going to be received well—especially not by men who rely on this system to stay in power.
Same with Rhaenyra. A Princess who has spent her life as an only child, initially derided for not being a son, only to then become the exception to the rule—a female heir, prized above all others, including the thing she's felt inferior to her whole childhood: a son. You combine that with years of Targaryen exceptionalism, and her being raised at the height of peace-time and Targaryen power and you get a spoiled, entitled person who is obviously going to tie her self-worth to being the heir.
It makes sense these women would be petty. It makes sense they'd jump into war, because they're feudal nobility, who grew up thinking their divine right to rule trumps the lives of worthless peasants. They'd want to be cruel and vicious, because this society expects them to be weak and pathetic, meaning they have to prove themselves competent three times over.
They are people, products of their time, and upbringing, and despite being selfish and *gasp* unlikable, doesn't make them any less deserving of sympathy.
The show doesn't seem to think that. They were of the belief that the audience could never sympathize with Rhaenyra if she unabashedly fought for the throne cause she wanted to. They thought we wouldn't be capable of loving a cunning, ambitious Queen who is convinced her values are correct and wants her son to receive what she thinks he's owed. And I sort of get their POV. Show Dany is a lot like book Rhaenyra (proud, stubborn, singularly focused on getting her crown and unapologetic about it), and the backlash her character received post S8 (and even before this) was rabid.
So ofc they thought toning both Alicent and Rhaenyra down and making their motivations be something other than personal ambition would help. But by doing this, they inadvertently jumped into the trap of benevolent sexism.
Neither of these women have any 'wants' of their own. Show Rhaenyra fights for the crown cause it's her 'duty', ie an ancient prophecy told her so. She disregards normal motherly grief and rage in favor of being a self sacrificing arbiter of peace who somehow feels no entitlement to rule, despite her environment, and the knowledge of her being the promised hero. All because she, as a woman, is more noble than that. I hope I don't have to tell you why this is sexist.
It's the same old gender essentialism that pegs women into the 'mother box'—she's the meek, passive voice of peace, there to manage the warmongering men and steer them toward a 'gentler' course. Its funny, cause Alicent and Rhaenys have a conversation about this in s1ep9, and Rhaenys rightfully points out how Alicent advocating for her son is her just making a wall in the window of her prison. And we as the audience are supposed to agree with Rhaenys, to see the hypocrisy of Alicent's reasoning. Except the show ends up vindicating that belief by having every single woman be like that.
Alicent is the same, doe-eyed child bride she was at 15. She has no agency of her own even as an adult 30+yo woman, and is always being forced to do stuff by her Father, or her sons. She feels no grief over the death of her grandson, is willing to sacrifice her own children simply cause 'war bad, Rhaenyra good.'
Despite arguably starting the war, the narrative wants to present her choice of surrendering to Rhaenyra as 'morally righteous'. Because by choosing the 'good side', she is atoning for her actions, and once again putting personal grievances aside for the sake of the greater good. Its asinine and doesn't work, because the choice makes her seem like an evil, callous hypocrite (she's legit offering up her sons for slaughter–including the one who was entirely uninvolved in this mess). Plus, it comes off as disingenuous, because the narrative has given her and Rhaenyra every fucking reason under the sun to hate each other and want the other dead.
But, because they're the noble, Angels in the House they are obligated to put aside all grievances and make peace. And if they do have any grievances, they are morally justified (like Rhaenyra taking out Aegon and Aemond, because both of them are just soooooo evil. Nvm that the son for a son justification doesn't work because Jaehaerys was killed. But oh, right, we can't have anyone be angry over that, so look away kids!)
And this pattern doesn't apply just to them—but to almost all the female characters in the show. In s1 Rhaenys tells Rhaenyra:
"Men would sooner put the realm to the torch, than see a woman on the Iron Throne."
The line not only reveals Rhaenys's bitterness over being passed over, but the innate understanding of the patriarchal culture they live in. The succession will always be challenged, because Rhaenyra is viewed as inherently inferior, because of her sex. And as a result, she will have to fight, tooth and nail, to not only be taken seriously, but keep her place.
Then, fast forward to s2, and what is Rhaenys telling her? Stop fighting, be passive, seek peace even while being attacked and undermined and hope the men will give you the crown because you asked nicely. It's bullshit. Nevermind that her reasons for supporting Rhaenyra make no sense either. Because she wants to keep the peace? Barely a few episodes ago, Rhaenys was convinced Rhaenyra and Daemon had her son killed. And instead of feeling resentment over it, feeling trapped and obligated to support Rhaenyra because Baela and Rhaena are Daemon's daughters and thus, intrinsically tied to the black cause... she gets over it. She sets aside righteous anger and suspicion over Laenor, to support Rhaenyra because 'she's fighting for the greater good'.
Baela too, has no ambition of her own. Neither she, nor Rhaena have any opinions on the Driftmark inheritance, nor are they allowed to feel resentment over the fact Daemon and Rhaenyra married before their Mom's body was even cold. Baela exists just to hype Rhaenyra up, and manage Jace's feelings for him, while Rhaena is there to cosplay Aemond's s1 arc, except make it worse.
Even Alys fucking Rivers and Mysaria were made the 'protectors of the innocent'. In the books, Mysaria is a female Varys, a cunning and ambitious woman who has no issue helping Daemon orchestrate the death of a child. She latches herself to power to secure benefits for herself, and if you believe the theory, may have been responsible for Rhaenyra's downfall, because she stoked her paranoia about Daemon and Nettles' affair. But on the show, she's the champion of the people, who supports Rhaenyra cause she's 'helping the smallfolk'.
Alys is fascinating. A baseborn witch who starts out as a victim of a 19yo dragonriding Prince who annihilates her entire family and takes her as a sex slave. But then, she flips the script on him, and gets him so obsessed with her, he disregards his own army, to the point that they get destroyed, all so he can stay with her. Depending on your reading, she maybe lets him to die as a possible sacrifice to make her child living, or he just dies on accident because she misinterpreted her vision of the Gods eye.
Regardless, she's adamant about being his widow and Queen post war, and is eager to launch a rebellion to conquer the throne on her son's behalf—by any means necessary, including exploding her enemies' heads and putting death curses on those who bad mouth her. And why does she do all this? Because she wants to. Maybe she has some greater, esoteric motivation, like book Euron, or maybe she's just ambitious. However you look at it, her goal is ultimately selfish because it seeks to destabilize a kingdom that is fresh off a brutal civil war, on behalf of a possibly illegitimate child and his witch mother.
Meanwhile, her show self is not only implied to be a Three Eyed Raven-like figure, but exists solely as the arbiter of fate. She's seemingly there to work out Daemon's feelings for him, mom him into stopping his war crimes and accepting his Queen. Her sole motivation—for now—seems to be the prophecy, and protecting the innocents; which is absurd, if you know her and Aemond's cannon relationship. So, in s3, its likely they'll just have her mom him like she did with Daemon, fail to stop his warcrimes, and then reluctantly send him to die at the God's eye to preserve the greater good. Which once again, would do nothing to dispel the benevolent sexism narrative, because she would only exist as an accessory to his villain arc; the sad woman who failed to redeem the bad man.
And you may ask, why is this a bad thing? Why shouldn't the media portray women as inherently better? Well, simple. Because it puts undo burden on women. It enforces the bullshit gender binary, that pidgeonholes women into passive, nurturing roles. It forces women to be perfect, to be the pinnacles of moral virture. And should they ever fail to live up to the standard, they get punished for it.
I already used this quote from Foz Meadows' essay "Gender, Orphan Black & The Meta Of Meta" but I have to use it again, because it so perfectly captures the core issue of why this trope is harmful:
We think of men as antiheroes, as capable of occupying an intense and fascinating moral grey area; of being able to fall, and rise, and fall again, but still be worthy of love on some fundamental level, because if it was the world and its failings that broke them, then we surely must owe them some sympathy. But women aren’t allowed to be broken by the world; or if we are, it’s the breaking that makes us villains. Wronged women turn into avenging furies, inhuman and monstrous: once we cross to the dark side, we become adversaries to be defeated, not lost souls in need of mending.
Which is what happens, when you let benevolent sexism invest you in the idea that women are humanity’s moral guardians and men its native renegades: because if female goodness is only ever an inherent quality – something we’re born both with and to be – then once lost, it must necessarily be lost forever, a severed limb we can’t regrow. Whereas male goodness, by virtue of being an acquired quality – something bestowed through the kindness of women, earned through right action or learned through struggle – can just as necessarily be gained and lost multiple times without being tarnished, like a jewel we might pawn in hardship, and later reclaim.
To conclude this rant, the show fucked all its female characters bad, and has suffered as a result. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go drown my sorrow in fanfic and chant to the Spaghetti Monster to make George finish those fucking books.
