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Cazadors attack!

Whenever I see an ad with people living in a house I automatically excuse myself from the experience. These people have house money. You expect me to afford the same product as people with house money? Laughable. Return at once, and tell the algorithm that sent you to try better.

sananaryon

Ads really should be treated like emisarries from rival lords.

mollyjames

I see here you've come to tell of an electronic service which, for a monthly fee, will read aloud to me literature from across the globe. And you say it shall provide me the fist tome free as a token of goodwill. A generous offer, or so it would appear, save for the fact that such a service is readily available to me publicly online and at my local library. Ah, you were hoping perhaps I was not aware of such resources? Begone, you slinking devil! Such trickery will not be tolerated in the house of James.

dailybayonetta

So where was i?

kay-frost

so let’s chat about IRON WIDOW

We interrupt our regularly scheduled aesthetic posting with a special message about the upcoming science-fiction YA novel IRON WIDOW by non-binary cosplayer, history buff, and YouTube sensation Xiran Jay Zhao (links to their website in the next post)

I have a longer, more formal “review” of this book scheduled for the release date (September 21st, 2021) but I really, really want to hype this book up as much as possible as early as possible to encourage people to pre-order it. I haven’t been this excited about a YA book in quite a while. Let me tell you why!

- It was pitched as PACIFIC RIM meets THE HANDMAID’S TALE in a world inspired by Chinese folklore and history, where boy-girl teams pilot giant mecha to fight alien monsters – but the psychic strain usually kills the girls. But only the girls….hmmm…something fishy is going on here…

- The main character is a reimagining of Wu Zetian, the only female emperor of China, who decides she’s going to assassinate the boy who murdered her older sister by volunteering to be his next co-pilot. She assassinates him so well that she kills him through their psychic link and becomes a dreaded IRON WIDOW!

- This makes her very interesting to the government, which would really prefer to make her disappear, but can’t afford to waste that kind of psychic power – so they pair her up with a ~dangerous criminal~ to pilot a new mecha, confident that he will be psychically strong enough to overpower her

- This backfires spectacularly, and suddenly Wu Zetian and her co-pilot have to manipulate both pop culture and the government just to stay alive.

- Plot ensues.

Why should you read this book?

Go back and re-read that plot summary until you understand why BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE!!

- We have a polyamorous F/M/M mutual relationship, I repeat, we PRE-EMPTIVELY SOLVE a LOVE TRIANGLE with POLYAMORY

- Wu Zetian is an amazing anti-hero and I mean that with all my heart. She is constantly doing stuff in this book that made me go, “Wait, can you do that?” She WILL cut a bitch. Also, she uses a cane or wheelchair because she has bound feet, and you can tell that Xiran really went the extra mile to think about how to portray this and how it affects the character. A lot of YA protagonists can start to feel “same-y” after a while to me, but Wu Zetian REALLY stands out.

- The world is really, really cool? There is SO MUCH going on with the aliens and the mecha and the world they’re living in which I cannot spoil except to say that your primary emotion through the third act will be “?!!!?!!?!!?!!!” AND even outside of the meta plot, there is so much thought and detail put into the rest of the setting, it is so beautiful and it feels like you’re really there. Plus every character is a reimagining/reference to a historical or folklore figure and it was really neat to go on a little scavenger hunt of “Oh! I recognize that name!”

- IRON WIDOW will do for YA sci-fi what CHILDREN OF BLOOD AND BONE did for YA fantasy – if it gets support. Xiran has talked about how they couldn’t get an American publisher to even consider publishing this book because publishers didn’t think American audiences would be interested in Chinese folklore or idol culture or a story about giant mecha, which?? Have they MET the internet?? They were also told that schools and libraries will be reluctant to stock IRON WIDOW because of the polyamorous romance. BUT that is why I really hope people show up for this book because it is SO DESERVING OF SUCCESS and it could open so many doors for other writers and for the whole YA landscape

- Xiran Jay Zhao is a really cool non-binary author and their writing is as charismatic and entertaining as their other content. I just think they’re neat!

- And one more thing? The cover looks like this:

torterragarden

Remember when Gollum told Sam to give it to him raw

mariaalenkoshepard

toastbutteregg

millennial-review-deactivated20

dailybayonetta

No matter the age, witches never learn…

wizard0rb

what did we do to deserve portal 2. that shit was so good and for what

wizard0rb

we got to have this! we got to have a valve game set in the half life universe, and its an enemies-to-lovers-to-enemies-again sci fi comedy story about a homicidal ai created to run tests forever and the test subject she catches feelings for!! how is this game real!!!

wizard0rb

happy birthday to the only video game ever

cakeknight1

The only NPC summons I don't fret over in the souls are

1. Tarkus because Tarkus Fucks™ and he bullies the Golem so hard it's kind of sad.

2. Paladin Leeroy. It's Pinwheel. He's Leeroy. 'nuff said.

3. Queen Killer because he's such a fucking giga Chad

4. Hawkwood because holy FUCK can he face tank dama- wait no Hawkwood get away from Ocerios you fool he's emitting Pestilent Mist you goddamn idiot

5. Lautrec because fuck you shiny cun-

6. Jester Thomas because oh god Thomas please stop she's already dead oh god

almightychiru

Everyone is here <3

lesbianshepard

apparently native american tribes were in contact with the donner party and offered them food when they saw the colonists were starving and the donner party turned them down and decided to go the whole “cannibalism” route instead.

lesbianshepard

Until now the Native American perspective has been left out of the telling of the Donner tragedy, not because the wel mel ti did not remember the pioneers, but because they were never asked, or perhaps were not ready to share. Their oral tradition recalls the starving strangers who camped in an area that was unsuitable for that time of year. Taking pity on the pioneers, the northern Washoe attempted to feed them, leaving rabbit meat and wild potatoes near the camps. Another account states that they tried to bring the Donner Party a deer carcass, but were shot at as they approached. Later, some wel mel ti observed the migrants eating human remains. Fearing for their lives, the area’s native inhabitants continued to watch the strangers but avoided further contact. These stories, and the archaeological evidence that appears to support them, certainly complicated my interpretation of the Donner Party event. The migrants at Alder Creek were not surviving in the mountains alone—the northern Washoe were there, and they had tried to help. (source)

tfw a group of unprepared strangers show up, refuse the food you offer them, start fucking cannibalizing each other, and then call you the savages

sindri42

The story of the Donner Party is hilarious to me because like, everybody talks about them like these brave pioneers who made the ultimate sacrifice in pursuit of their destiny or whatever the fuck, but they were just complete dumbasses.

Like, have you ever heard of the Murphy Party? Sometimes called the Stephens-Townsend-Murphy Party? They were the first wagon train of the pioneers to make it over the Sierra Nevada, two full years before the Donners tried it, first of the american pioneers to reach the shores of lake Tahoe, first licensed physician in California, etc. etc. Ten families, about fifty people, not a single casualty (they actually arrived with more people than when they left). Because when the Donners picked the most charismatic city boy as their leader, the Murphys picked a mountain man. Where the Donners decided to take a “shortcut” that was completely impassable based on a letter they got from somebody who wanted to drum up business for a trading post he was building but who had never actually driven a wagon, the Murphys scouted properly and stuck to paths their vehicles could actually traverse. Where the Donners decided to shoot at the people who were already living in the area, the Murphys asked the natives for directions. When they got snowed in, they sent a few men on ahead to bring back supplies to the rest of the party after building a sturdy cabin for shelter, instead of trying to hole up in shoddy tents and lean-tos before eating each other.

Not to mention all the idiotic in-fighting in the Donner party; they were constantly brawling or stabbing each other or exiling people or just leaving old men on the side of the path to die or “accidentally” shooting their rivals while cleaning weapons, while literally hundreds of other wagon trains somehow made it through the same trials without any murder.

So naturally, the Donners got a lake and a pass and a state park named after them and became household words, while anybody who wasn’t a complete moron got maybe a local park or a small creek.

ironbite4

Daaaaaaaaaamn.

thedoormowse

It gets even better!

Donner was not the original leader of the group- the expedition started out under the leadership of a man named Reed, who did know what he was doing and had lead several groups safely to the Oregon Territory before.

When they reached the point where the new “California Trail” diverged from the Oregon Trail Donner convinced a large portion of the group to join him and travel across the Sierras.

Reed knew this was a very, very bad idea but Donner was apparently just- extremely charismatic and persuasive. Not only did the Reed Party safely make it to Oregon, as originally planned, but Reed immediately headed south as fast as he humanly could, and upon reaching Sacramento recruited a rescue party to bring emergency supplies up from the other side of the pass.

Unfortunately, it was already too late in the year and the weather forced the rescue party to turn back. Despite knowing the odds against the Donner Party surviving Reed refused to assume their deaths and stayed in Sacramento waiting for the mountain trail to clear.

So not only did Reed warn them not to, he was also the one that found the survivors afterwards.

Fuck Donner.

zevveli

I still think that my favorite urban legend/folklore fact is that there are certain areas in New Orleans where you cannot get a taxi late at night not because it isn’t safe, but because taxi companies have had recurring problems of picking up ghosts in those areas who are not aware that they are dead and disappearing from the cab before reaching the destination and therefore stiffing the driver on the fare causing a loss for the company.

elsajeni

An occupational hazard of cab driving I had not previously considered

princessnijireiki

I love that the nola problem here is not “ghosts in my taxi cab,” but “ghosts are FUCKING BROKE DEAD BASTARDS & I GOT BILLS”

siderealsandman

Horror is when ghosts get into cabs and scare drivers Magical realism is when cab companies have to develop policies to prevent ghastly fare-theft

kc749

In a book about the tsunami in Japan in 2011, the writer talked about how there was a huge increase in reports of ghostly activity. Apparently in Japan treating ghosts rudely is basically considered the stupidest thing you could possibly do. For months after the tsunami, taxi drivers would pick up a passenger only to have them give an address in one of the devastated areas. The cab driver often looked up halfway to the destination to find their fare had disappeared. Not wanting to be impolite to the person (even if they were dead) they’d drive to the address, open the door to let them out, then drive away.