“is there anything so undoing as a daughter”

multi-fandom but mostly audio fiction (tma, midnight burger, tpp, amelia project, tsv), arcane, whatever else strikes my fancy. header by @arcanegifs. I follow as casthewise.

[quillquiver]

so, if tumblr nukes me for whatever reason you can find me at quillquiver on ao3 and dreamwidth 

[rowark]

(X)

[goomymegpoid]

I wish this feeling upon everyone who wants to wear a dress, its really the best

[ghostlynblm]

this makes me so happy as a fat hairy guy who likes skirts and dresses i never get to see guys like me in dresses it’s always skinny twinks this makes me so happy 🥺🥺

[littlegirlinvisible]

ILYA’S VOICE: PUT THEM BACK ON, PLEASE.

HUDSON WILLIAMS Behind the scenes for Timid Magazine (2025)

[smokey-ilya]

the way i know every worksheet shane did in middle school was addressed like

[quillquiver]

Thinking about the differences between Shane and Ilya’s early careers and I don’t know how it was in Russia, but I can imagine Shane billeting in like fucking Sherbrooke or some shit when he’s 16, far from home but known as the guy who’s gonna get drafted. Like, barring something disastrous, it’s clear. And this is a fucking multi-edged sword for him, because on the one hand, in terms of skill and play, Shane Hollander is the man. However, he is also quiet and not super interested in socializing and queer and not white.

Shane has to deal with chirps about his race all the time. Chirps about his marked lack of body hair compared to his peers, his pretty face, the fact that his mom is so hands on (thinking of one particular phrase here). Shane is constantly feminized because he’s Asian, and it doesn’t help that he’s such a goody two shoes - I mean, fuck, Holly’s kill count is 1 because he’s so committed to his fucking girlfriend. And I think he can get away with that because of his skill. I think his quirks in the name of keeping up his performance saves him a lot of the time, but it wouldn’t protect him from everything. It can’t. Hockey has a very bro-y herd mentality and if you don’t gel with the team you’re out. Which means he has to gel, and at that level that means being one of the boys.

So, while Shane isn’t necessarily hazed as consistently and violently as the rest of the rookies, I think he is hazed, and it is fucked up. And it fucks him up specifically, because he’s starting to heavily suspect (read: in his heart he knows) that he likes guys. And yeah, he doesn’t have to drink dick beer (he would die before allowing himself to show weakness in front of these guys he doesn’t care he can’t lose), but he feels violated and terrified the whole time he’s doing pushups, because what if the rest of them can tell? What if there’s something about him that gives himself away? It’s not just his career that’ll be ruined (before it even starts). He’s 16, there are guys in the room that are fucking 20. They’re men. And I mean, it’s tough for Shane to tell when something is and is not considered gay when it comes to this shit so he stays out of it all, but what the fuck will they do to him if they find out? Or what will they make him do if they think he’ll like it?

I know that Heated Rivalry is romance and fiction but in the same way that I think there is so much interesting shit to dig into re: the fact that Shane plays for Montreal where hockey is basically a religion, we could have some really interesting conversations about how it’s really likely that Shane would have been incredibly traumatized by growing up in hockey culture because of his race, sexuality, and the fact that the culture is fucked to begin with. I think experiences like that shape how you inhabit the closet and how paranoid you get in protecting a piece of your identity that could actually have physically harmed you if it had gotten out. Add the Montreal of it into the mix, and yeah, I would be fucking paranoid about everything too. And it would take me a very very long time and copious hours of therapy to like, actually feel settled and comfortable after being outed.

[quillquiver]

Hey so if you’re Canadian, a hockey fan (new to the sport or been here forever), and/or someone who just wants to know a bit more about hockey culture and hockey culture in Canada, you should watch Code of Misconduct. It’s a documentary about the trial of the Canada 5 (SA criminal trial) and it is extremely upsetting and disturbing but very worth it to really understand how fucked up hockey culture is and how systemic the worship of hockey players is in Canadian life. It’s a really important thing to watch and know about, especially because one of the guys who was acquitted is currently the starting goalie for Vegas and is playing in the cup final as we speak.

[firstprinced]

pretty boy in loveee

[penandinkprincess]

with how much shane enjoys getting pinned down, i'm laughing about the idea of ilya who knows academically that he and shane are equally matched but who never really transfers that thought to the bedroom because he and shane playfight/wrestle as foreplay but shane enjoys "losing" these particular struggles and thus doesn't really ever use his full strength beyond the opening few seconds

which means the first time shane is riding him and is close to finishing and thus shoves him the FUCK back down when ilya is about to sit up and turn them hits ilya like a fucking FREIGHT TRAIN

man is getting held down with a hand to his chest with a force shane hasn't actually used in bed before and he is about to pass! out! from the force of the horny crashing over him

[penandinkprincess]

the idea of ilya edging and frustrating shane specifically to provoke him into slamming him down and holding him there to take what he wants

[ilyarizzanov]

will I be burnt at the stake if I say that I don’t think Ilya’s fuckboy persona is entirely an act. will people draw and quarter me if I say that I think he is a different person with different people and none of them are entirely separate from who he is. will people stone me if I say that ilya loved being a fuckboy and loved sleeping around at the time and had a fucking blast doing what and who he wanted even if he wanted to be with shane for most of it.

Like I think people eschew that persona from him too aggressively in favor of making him a Soft Boi but there are multiple facets to ilya and I dont think any of them are necessarily fake. Just because he used promiscuity to cope doesn’t mean he didn’t have a marvelous time participating in it. That man loved pussy. He loved fucking pussy and eating pussy and making women come and whine his name. You cannot convince me otherwise. He was a very proud slut. Just because Shane made a housewife out of a hoe doesn’t make the Hoe Phase not genuine. U feel me?

[hr-rep]

Ilya watches trashy tv shows and like clockwork, after his nightly workout, Shane will come into the room and roll his eyes at whatever is going on, and then. He. Won’t move. He will stand there, for literal hours and anytime Ilya is like Shane. Just sit down, join me. Shane denies it like no no I’m Not Watching. And to him, that’s true, he’s not watching. Just don’t point out when he corrects Ilya later when he’s relaying what happened in the episode to Wyatt.

[jewelcoatfish]

interviewer: ilya rozanov, do you have any comment on the alleged homophobic comments targeting you in today’s game?

ilya: if they could just put their minds off where i put my dick and into where i put the puck, maybe they would notice that it is going into the goal

interviewer: shane hollander, do you have any comment on your husband and captain’s rather coarse language?

shane: is he wrong?

[gaynehollander]

I think Shane coming hands free the first time he was fucked genuinely made Ilya feel insane. Like, here is your league-mandated rival, he skates like a god, he has the media eating out of the palm of his hand, he commands the room without even seeming to realise his power, he is fucking gorgeous, he drops to his knees at the slightest prompting, he moans like a whore, and, oh! he also fucking spurts all over himself just from having your dick in his ass. Have fun trying to content yourself with fucking literally anyone else for the rest of your life!

[creamsiclemelt]

Heated Rivalry | Episode 1 | Rookies

[mymansmoon]

imagining shane hanging out with his parents and while he's away from his phone doing something with his dad a call comes in. yuna sees this and goes, "shane, someone's calling you!"

and shane says, "who is it?"

"lily!"

"oh." shane immediately sets aside what he's doing and walks over, saying to his mom, "that's ilya."

yuna looks at him in confusion as he picks up his phone. "why is ilya saved as 'lily' in your phone?"

and shane looks at her, away, shrugs as if it's obvious and simply says, "I can't have ilya rozanov saved on my phone, mom" before answering the call with a, "hey, baby" and walking away.

leaving yuna (and david) standing shocked and, once again, shaken at how little they knew about their son and the layers of concealment he's had to operate under for years just to love who he loves.

[mymoonandmyshane]

i believe that one of the penalties shane gets a lot is unsportsmanlike conduct. in the nhl, this penalty can be issued for players who argue or challenge the refs calls. now, captains are allowed to discuss a call and rule interpretations with a ref, but you gotta be cordial.

shane “hockeytism” hollander HATES when a ref makes a bad call. this is literally your job and youre fucking it up?? that was not slashing are you blind?? he gets heated about this, even when he’s just watching a random game. he’s shouting and cursing and making a well-informed case for why the ref is wrong.

hockey refs are notoriously bad so i guarantee shane gets into it a lot. i do think he knows when to quit so he doesnt get an unnecessary penalty but sometimes the call is so bad he cant help but be furious. his teammates have had to physically restrain him on the bench multiple times so he didnt hop the boards and scream at them.

[endiness]

"That was a rule. That was a choice that we made."

bonus:

[ilya-rozanova]

heated rivalry: endless gifs