[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

Did a brand new kind of bowling shot today

we called it the "trust the Force Luke" shot or the "through God all things are possible" shot

[thewintercavalier]

[thememedaddy]

[zukkaoru]

[ID: a tweet by @ byclintedwards that says “My wife and I were planning a vacation, and I said ‘is it okay if I create a spreadsheet for this?’ She said with absolute glee, ‘Yes! A spreadsheet would be perfect!’ I got my laptop, and she looked at me with not exactly lust, but something close. This is how we flirt now.” End ID]

[mariacallous]

[entirelytookeen]

[ruinedchildhood]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[strangetikigod]

[ruinedchildhood]

THE GRINCH WAS REALLY OUT HERE WITH HIS GRUSSY OUT

[fagstaynight]

(getting a taste of my own medicine) actually this is okay. Is this what you guys have bene whining about? Jesus christ

[shroomshroomm]

[byruit]

[foone]

making cats use windows 8 is cruel and unusual

[randomthingsthatilike1]

at least its not windows 11

[marlynnofmany]

*giant wind gust outside*

Me: “Don’t say it.”

My Brain:

[madlori]

Some random person in a neutral context: Let’s get down to business.

Me: Don’t say it.

My brain:

[charlesoberonn]

A co-worker: I’m gonna use the restroom

Me: Don’t say it.

My brain:

[milowing]

the father (dolly parton), the son (sabrina carpenter), and the holy spirit (miss piggy)

[surenschompychompers]

I don't think this needs explanation

[wordfather]

sorry boss i cant come into work today my cat made a cute sound in her sleep and now i have to watch over my angel for the rest of the day so i can kill for her. yeah i dont care who i'll kill for her

[wordfather]

yeah boss it was one if those high-pitched mrrp sounds and she burrowed her face into her paws. yeah dont worry im purchasing a sword so i can protect her peace. im on it

[dreamduality]

say something funny

[dreamduality]

about house md

[gean-grey-blog]

I started writing House MD fanfic in high school and because my autistic ass got into it so hard I was reading anatomy textbooks on break during my summer job when I was 16 I wrote a bunch of meticulously researched if dramatic and very "written by a 16 year old" fanfic. Like went and joined forums for each condition to describe them as accurately as possible. And like. Accidentally helped like. A bunch of people figure out what was wrong with them by essentially doing fully new medical description research bc I was obsessed with the toxic old man yaoi

[dreamduality]

old man yaoi saves lives

[ferigrievance]

consuming mass amounts of media related to my hyperfixation isnt enough i need to eat it

[totally-a-wizard]

Christians with the Eucharist.

[ferigrievance]

this is the funniest fucking reply ive gotten on this post everyone go home

[thesummoningdark]

The last week has been so ridiculous even the satirists can’t take it any more

[the-stray-liger]

the fucking timestamp

[corsairesix]

I love the characterization of Lae'zel as a deliberate, reasonable person who through no fault of her own is wrong about almost everything

[painhungry]

I feel as if this is her general attitude for practically the whole first act

[sexymixedkid-deactivated2012071]

you are the weakest twink goodbye

[spacecowboy3039]

[tired-fandom-ndn]

I am whatever the opposite of a speed runner is. I am a game meanderer. I have to look at literally everything. I am overly cautious in every way. I forget to pause and wander away from the game. I take a minimum 7 hours to get through any given level. If you give me a timer I will cry.

[json-derulo]