Random Clod

Call me Random, or Clod, or whatever, any pronouns. Autistic nerd with lots of interests, including writing, worldbuilding, spec bio, angels, dolls, and my fair share of fandoms.

[randomclod]

i have a writing commissions page now. mostly for fun but a little bit for money. i'll write you a drabble for a dollar, or something longer for more dollars

[aflo]

I'm imagining a world where RPGMaker somehow made it as the de facto codebase for software and you have to navigate your banking app by walking around in a huge room full of NPCs named "make deposit" and "make withdrawal" etc and there's loud as fuck stock music playing

[aflo]

[emesissy]

when she fucks you so good you become interested in baseball ????

[lillihammerdown]

When she plays baseball so good you get interested in fucking????????

[sleepyjump]

when the baseball fucks her and now you're interested in playing ???? ???? ???? ????

[tj-crochets]

My grandma just called and, among other things, said “You have hips. That’s good! Men like hips!” and then she interrupted herself to say “Women like hips. People of your preferred gender like hips. I can never remember”  And I was like “Thanks grandma! My preferred gender is none of them, no thanks.” and she was like “Okay, no one will comment on your hips!” very self satisfied, like “aha, I have figured it out” I think like half her grandkids are some variety of not-straight and she can’t always remember which is which but she is the epitome of like “she’s a little confused, but she’s got the spirit!”

[tj-crochets]

Update: I gave it some thought and my estimate was wrong. Of the grandkids that are out, it’s 1/3, not ½

[tj-crochets]

I told my grandma that I’d told my friends about what she said and that some of y’all had said you wished she was your grandma, and she said “Well, you can never have too many grandkids!”  So like…consider her your honorary grandma* I guess? *if you want an honorary grandma, that is

[tj-crochets]

Update on my grandma: I told her my hair was standing up, but instead of straight line it was diagonal and she said “That’s okay, you’ve never been straight!” and then laughed so hard at her own joke I thought she was going to drop the phone

[tj-crochets]

Happy almost pride month! Have my confused-but-supportive grandma!

[tj-crochets]

An update: my grandma just called me to ask if I knew it was pride month

[tj-crochets]

Happy pride month!!

[qi-mera]

More of you need to learn about these ☝️

[jadenebula]

[ruinedchildhood]

Tigers with a frozen milk brick on a hot day

[dragondriana]

needless to say they are hopelessly dependent on the ingot

[kibber-cat]

Assorted traditional wd fanart

Some are charcoal, some are pencil <3

[tinybed]

[comealongphil]

dawn dimmadome? wife of doug dimmadome, owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome?

[punkrorschach]

actually she took the dimmadome in the dimmadivorce

[charseraph]

I’m getting surgery to give me the spine, guts, gall, and nerve

[s4mm4n]

God I miss the days when you could show up to a stranger’s farm and he’d say “What’s your name, boy?” and you’d take off your hat and hold it to your chest to better let him see your face and reply “Why I ain’t got none, sir, on account of my mammy passed on before she could give me one” and he’d tell you he’s real damn sorry to hear that and ask what he can do you for and you’d tell him that you can’t read nor even write neither but you’re mighty good with horses and can mend them fallen fence posts what you saw on your way in and won’t ask for nothing much more than a hot meal and a warm barn to sleep in and he’d keep his wife and daughters inside but send his boy who ain’t got married yet even though his mama tells him he needs a woman out with a lantern and some stew at night and the two of you’d get to talkin and he’d throw you his flask to take a swig from and watch you drinkin from it while he leant against the door frame and when he finally got called back on up to the house again he’d take a sip from it too real slow-like like it weren’t the whiskey what he were tryna savour

[argumate]

you see you don’t get posts like this on twitter

[lastweekseyeliner]

every day at least once while on a walk i think to myself “it weren’t the whiskey what he were tryna savour” and sometimes if i am alone i say it out loud

[lethotep]

It's important to have at least two blorbos that fit into specific roles in your life

The blorbo you can look to in hard times, and ask yourself what they would do in a situation, and draw motivation from them on how to be better and stronger!

The blorbo you can look to in hard times, and remind yourself that no matter what happens, you probably aren't going to fuck your shit up as much as they did even if you actively tried

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

crush totally wasn't impressed by my miraculous flying machine fml

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

oh my god i just saw her get onto an airship with a woman whose tophat has at least twice as many sprockets as mine. i will be killing myself with an elaborate pneumatic pistol tonight

[cuunos]

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

[paper-mario-wiki]

do not forget the patron saint of these weeks that we celebrate ourselves proudly and openly in the streets

her name was Marsha P Johnson, and we have her to thank for so much.

remember, the first Pride was a riot, and she was one of the brave souls who endured it to help carve the path which so many of us walk today. she helped found several activist groups regarding LGBT safety and wellbeing. and she was absolutely radiant, too.

thank you, Marsha. we remember you.

[noelledeltarune]

before pride month ends does anyone wanna admit they have a crush on me

[noelledeltarune]

posting this on the first day of june so you all have plenty of time to gather your nerves and whatnot

[themoonandmyman]

Guys. Come on now. I don’t want to make things too serious but here’s something you really have to remember:

[sodomit]

The concept of "screen time" for youth is bonkers.

How about "friends you don't have to pretend around" time.

"Uncensored access to information" time.

"Equal opportunity for respect" time.

"Being able to walk away from people who are trying to harass you" time.

Is that why adults are so insistent on limiting it? Because they don't want youth to have these things?