I have ocs sadly

I barely write about em tho lMAOOO

[fullmetalfisting]

Me: *looking at a porcelain hand in the home decor aisle of a store* if I lost my hands in some kind of tragic accident, I’d decorate my entire home with hand-shaped things. Then I’d invite guests over for like, dinner parties and such and sit there expectantly just basking in their discomfort.

My boyfriend: Do you hear what you say when you talk? Do you know what you just said to me?

[duckdotcom]

*squinting into the fog* who goes there?! Willem Dafriend, or...

[ryan-sometimes]

I only recently realized that the reason why I expect mutual obsession in relationships is because my PARENTS are Gomez and Morticia levels of obsessed with each other

[mushyooms]

he's so real

[frownyalfred]

Tips for writing those gala scenes, from someone who goes to them occasionally:

Generally you unbutton and re-button a suit coat when you sit down and stand up.

You’re supposed to hold wine or champagne glasses by the stem to avoid warming up the liquid inside. A character out of their depth might hold the glass around the sides instead.

When rich/important people forget your name and they’re drunk, they usually just tell you that they don’t remember or completely skip over any opportunity to use your name so they don’t look silly.

A good way to indicate you don’t want to shake someone’s hand at an event is to hold a drink in your right hand (and if you’re a woman, a purse in the other so you definitely can’t shift the glass to another hand and then shake)

Americans who still kiss cheeks as a welcome generally don’t press lips to cheeks, it’s more of a touch of cheek to cheek or even a hover (these days, mostly to avoid smudging a woman’s makeup)

The distinctions between dress codes (black tie, cocktail, etc) are very intricate but obvious to those who know how to look. If you wear a short skirt to a black tie event for example, people would clock that instantly even if the dress itself was very formal. Same thing goes for certain articles of men’s clothing.

Open bars / cash bars at events usually carry limited options. They’re meant to serve lots of people very quickly, so nobody is getting a cosmo or a Manhattan etc.

Members of the press generally aren’t allowed to freely circulate at nicer galas/events without a very good reason. When they do, they need to identify themselves before talking with someone.

[panakina]

As someone who spent over a decade catering luxury events, let me add some back of house info:

These events are almost always open bar. They're not trying to make their money back on alcohol. They want you to drink and eat and donate generously.

If there are cocktails, there will be at most two on offer, pre-made in large tubs. You cannot order a different version, it is what it is.

There are two types of events: cocktail style or seated. The first includes roaming hors d'oeuvres or a fancy buffet with tiny plates called a grazing station. For a long night, the roaming food will get a little bigger throughout the evening and have a 'main' at some point based around a protein.

A seated event will usually be more structured and may include multiple courses. Silver service is not in vogue anymore. You are likely to get either alternating meals brought to you like at a wedding, or served banquet style. A good caterer can get a plate to everyone in a 300 person event in about three minutes.

Drunk people are the same no matter how expensive their suits. They still laugh too loud, spill their drinks and slip on the dance floor. They are usually less embarrassed about doing coke in the bathrooms.

A full scale event that starts at 6pm will have staff arriving at noon to begin setup. Earlier if there's a light show or pyrotechnics. Typically venues don't just have 30 tables and three hundred chairs lying around, let alone table cloths, chair covers, etc. It's all rented and brought in on the day. Bands and DJs will be running audio tests in the background throughout.

Most heritage buildings that host these things, like museums and manor houses, aren't really designed for them. They might put down mats so you're not walking in stilettos over two hundred year old wooden floors, the kitchens are weirdly far away, and there are not enough taps. There is never anywhere for staff to sit, so if you open the wrong door you might find half a dozen waiters sitting on upturned milk crates in a room full of million dollar paintings, eating the left over bread.

Really old buildings don't have enough bathrooms, which means the staff will be sharing with the guests.

Clean up starts the second the event ends, if not sooner. Unattended glasses will start to disappear first, then table decorations. When the timer ticks over, the lights come back on and exhausted staff strip the tables, pack up dirty glasses and unopened wine bottles and have to Tetris it all into the back of a van. The venue is booked for that day only, so everything has to be gone before anyone can go home. A large event that finishes at midnight might take until 3am to be cleared away.

These are very long and physically demanding nights for anyone working them. The staff all get to know each other, and will absolutely notice someone trying to sneak in wearing a borrowed uniform. They are not being paid enough to care.

[catilinas]

help i’m in london w my dad and he keeps pointing at buildings and saying ‘there used to be a coffee shop here’ but by ‘used to be’ he means. in the seventeenth century

[catilinas]

we went past a pub and he was like ‘when this was a coffee shop (in the seventeenth century) isaac newton dissected a dolphin in the back room one time’ like ok. we are about to miss the train

[arctic-hands]

Your dad was present for all of these things

[tamarrud]

UNRWA, ANERA and WCK have all been forced to pause or halt their humanitarian operations in Gaza because Israel has deliberately targeted any means of lifesaving aid to a starved, maimed, and tortured population of over 2 million Palestinians, almost half of which are children.

This has been broadcasted by Israel so that it sets the precedent of what is deemed permissible in the face of "international law". I said it before, it does not get any more obviously genocidal than this.

[midwinterhunt]

hot artists don't gatekeep

I've been resource gathering for YEARS so now I am going to share my dragons hoard

Floorplanner. Design and furnish a house for you to use for having a consistent background in your comic or anything! Free, you need an account, easy to use, and you can save multiple houses.

Comparing Heights. Input the heights of characters to see what the different is between them. Great for keeping consistency. Free.

Magma. Draw online with friends in real time. Great for practice or hanging out. Free, paid plan available, account preferred.

Smithsonian Open Access. Loads of free images. Free.

SketchDaily. Lots of pose references, massive library, is set on a timer so you can practice quick figure drawing. Free.

SculptGL. A sculpting tool which I am yet to master, but you should be able to make whatever 3d object you like with it. free.

Pexels. Free stock images. And the search engine is actually pretty good at pulling up what you want.

Figurosity. Great pose references, diverse body types, lots of "how to draw" videos directly on the site, the models are 3d and you can rotate the angle, but you can't make custom poses or edit body proportions. Free, account option, paid plans available.

Line of Action. More drawing references, this one also has a focus on expressions, hands/feet, animals, landscapes. Free.

Animal Photo. You pose a 3d skull model and select an animal species, and they give you a bunch of photo references for that animal at that angle. Super handy. Free.

Height Weight Chart. You ever see an OC listed as having a certain weight but then they look Wildly different than the number suggests? Well here's a site to avoid that! It shows real people at different weights and heights to give you a better idea of what these abstract numbers all look like. Free to use.

[narrettwist]

Homie gonna share this

[bitty-bytes]

If he's so evil and heartless, why is he cuddling with me oh so gently and kissing me?

[funeral-clown]

actually supervillains with kid hero nemeses are hysterical bc if i was a billionaire and i found out the kid who was also my nemesis was a preteen orphan i would simply adopt them. oh you’re going to stop my nefarious schemes? how when you’re grounded. go to your room

[funeral-clown]

the trick is be a good parent so they don’t wanna fight you. son if you topple my criminal empire how will i pay for your college? reverse batmanning

[funeral-clown]

Weaponized guilt. Son you’re out on a school night? When you have that big science test tomorrow? I thought you’d be studying…getti g some rest…no I’m not mad I’m just. Well a little disappointed I guess. What do you mean this wouldn’t be happening if I’d stop robbing banks their insurance covers it son money isn’t real

[funeral-clown]

Who’s this guy is he your “sidekick”? That’s so cute when are you having him over for dinner. I’m not teasing I think it’s sweet I’m glad you’re making friends. Side note how durable is he I’m about to throw a car at you

[heroes-villains-side-blog]

[lotusinjadewell]

Traditional costumes of H'Mong subgroups. Credit to Hnubflower.

[dutchlines]

Macaque: Do you even know what an amulet is?

Sun Wukong: Of course I do! I eat amulets sometimes. I like the ones with cheese and onions!

Macaque: Wukong, those are omelettes.

Sun Wukong: Oh. Then I’ve got nothing.

---

Mk: It’s impossible to make a sentence without using the letter a.

Red Son: Despite your thinking, it is quite possible, yet difficult, to form one without the specific letter. Here’s one more to further disprove your theory.

Mei: Fuck you.

---

MK: You bought a taco?

Macaque: Yes.

MK: From the same truck that hit Sun Wukong?!

Macaque, with a mouthful of taco: Well, me starving ain't gonna help them.

---

Mei: What’s your biggest fear?

Macaque: That I’ll never be good enough for anyone.

Sun Wukong: Everyone hates me and talks about me behind my back.

MK: Zombies.

Macaque: ...

Sun Wukong: ...

MK: BUT they can open doors.

---

MK: Are you laughing at that video of Macaque and Sun Wukong fighting?

mei: No.

mei: I'm laughing at the comments.

---

mei: Tang, you'll be working with Pigsy and MK.

Tang: Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Everyone else: *blank stares*

Tang: ...Of people on a team.

---

MK: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Pigsy: My life is a little too much fall and not enough boy.

Tang: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.

Mei: My life is a little too much imagination and not nearly enough dragons.

---

Tang Sanzang, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume?

Sun Wukong: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle*

Sun Wukong:

Sun Wukong: It's perfume.

[portraitoftheoddity]

Thinking about how my mom tried to “seduce” my dad when they were in college together by sneaking oranges into his backpack, because she grew up food insecure and feeding someone/sharing food was a big deal with her upbringing with a lot of emotional meaning–

and meanwhile my poor dad is just convinced that he’s been haunted by some citrus poltergeist because why the fuck are there always oranges in his bag he swears he did not put there???

[risoria]

the squad is all here! 

[lowpolyanimals]

Kuzco from The Emperor’s New Groove

[reversewerewolf]

[self-loving-vampire]

They really should teach people how to cook in school.

[octopuscato]

This was physically painful to watch.

[shades-of-grayro]

Queerplatonic Relationships: An Introduction

Image text below the cut.

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