Tummyhurter

She/They caused psychic damage to a tumblr user in person

[emperor-gaozu-of-han]

getting followed by porn bots is weird and that’s coming from a guy with multiple 🥵 concubines

[emperor-gaozu-of-han]

this is really resonating with the subjects

[qin-shi-huang-di]

step aside you old cut-sleeve, i shall court these maidens!

[emperor-gaozu-of-han]

I’m an emperor actually @chasingtheskyline

[qin-shi-huang-di]

the marquis of homo WISHES he had a fraction of my imperial glory!

[emperor-gaozu-of-han]

right so i’m one of the most well regarded emperors in the history of china and you’re the guy who had to put “shut up about the mercury” in his bio

[qin-shi-huang-di]

I AM NOT OWNED! I AM NOT OWNED!!!

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN EARN THE LOVE OF MY CITIZENS!

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN ADEQUATELY PREPARE MY SUCCESSOR!

I AM A GLORIOUS EMPEROR, I CAN ESTABLISH A STABLE DYNASTY!

[diet-poison]

the Terracotta Army guy?

[qin-shi-huang-di]

🙄 you build ONE funerary complex with 8000 life-sized statues of soldiers, horses and generals and suddenly you’re “the terracotta army guy.” 🙄 execution.

[slimlimit]

Stumbling across this makes me feel like a dad whos walked into their kids room beer in hand and seeing them roleplay starwars fights i do not belong here but god its entertaining

[emperor-gaozu-of-han]

to be clear in this scenario im the jedi and im winning

[tobiasdrake]

A detail I find really interesting about Chell, GLaDOS, and Wheatley's first confrontation in Portal 2 is when Wheatley starts gloating about taking over the facility. "I did this! Tiny little Wheatley did this!"

And GLaDOS interjects like, "You didn't do this. She did all the work!"

I find that interjection fascinating because. Like.

GLaDOS doesn't actually know anything about what happened behind the scenes. She lost track of Chell and Wheatley after Wheatley opened up a wall panel and they bolted off together into the facility's inner workings. She doesn't see them again until Chell falls for her fake door trap, at which point GLaDOS is unpleasantly surprised to discover that Chell's disabled the turrets and neurotoxin in the meantime.

She has no evidentiary foundation to base that accusation on.

This is also before GLaDOS recognizes Wheatley as the Dumbass Core, so it's not based on an assessment of him.

The only explanation it leaves is that it's based on her assessment of Chell. Despite GLaDOS's enmity towards Chell, the one thing she rarely goes after Chell for is her intelligence.

When she does, it's an admission of her high standards for Chell; Like when the fake door trap works and GLaDOS concedes, "I didn't actually think that would work. I already built a much better, smarter trap up ahead for when this one fails." That's a backhanded insult. It's calling her dumb, but in a disappointed way rather than an affirming way.

Chell tests very well. Between the two games, GLaDOS has developed a strong understanding of Chell's aptitude for critical thinking and problem-solving in stressful situations.

And so she takes it on faith, just from what she knows of Chell, that Wheatley is stealing Chell's credit.

[voidpengin]

tags by @phidelta

[darkestcinema]

renaissance in the 21st century

[blogitalianissimo]

[tinyphantomsalad]

some more

[kitsunebattleboxer]

the WHAT??

[personification-of-anxiety]

okay, found her

[whenstarsfall]

[whenstarsfall]

some more good replies from the notes

[whenstarsfall]

[camellianswer]

i didnt expect these to hit so hard but then they kept going and going….my god

[charm-troll]

[brittlepredatordemon]

Actually, no, I don't think that friendships dropping like flies in your late 20s and early 30s because no one has time for that between overwork and family obligations and marriage and kids and partners and the ritual of the time slayer is normal and ok. No I don't think deep conversations and spontaneous adventures being replaced with a tired coffee every six months is a normal part of growing up. I don't think that emotional intimacy and soul bonds disintegrating in the face of practical inconvenience is a fact of life. I think that means something is deeply deeply wrong with our society and I will never forgive it for the friends I've lost

[samreich]

all masks depicted in this episode are entirely fictitious. any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events is purely coincidental.

[jollygengar]

May the feasting never cease

[lesbx]

it’s funny bc milk does actually come from a creature

[justinforprez]

evidence? 

[lesbx]

your mom told me lol. boys, waste this numbnuts

[bigwizardhat]

[bernard-jackson]

[yossyislandd]

you fucking suck at burger

[zangoonse]

[allpiesforourown]

Me sending nudes: like what you see? ;)

Artist who's only fucking me for reference material: yeahhh 🥵🥵 would be even hotter if you moved closer to the light source and moved your head to a 3/4 view in the pic

[patronsaintofweepingmothers]

2009

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

[dragongirlsnout]

2000-2002 Saturn SL1

[miss-wizard]

its shorts actualy

[lesbx]

This is the first and only time this note preview feature has landed. the faint whisper of mike lurking in the shadows

[lesbx]

I like how this post is still going around long after it’s outlived this entire website feature

[agentofdeterioration]

The Catalogue of Ships in the Iliad is, to a modern audiences, what classicists have called “boring as hell,” but I can’t help but think that if you were watching Homer recite it it would have been more like when comedians go, “anybody here tonight from Chicago?” and the Chicagoans in the back start cheering

Homer’s like, “and there were forty black ships from… LOCRIS” and the Locrians in the crowd start going absolutely nuts

[insomniac-arrest]

I think we should figure out what age we’re living in now so we can say how it’s collapsing to each other

[insomniac-arrest]

Our age of plastics is collapsing

[puppygirllaika]

Our age of silicon is collapsing

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason your snacks are unsatisfying is that you need both carb and protein.

Carb starts your engine, protein keeps it going.

No carb, engine don’t start. No protein, engine dies out fast.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Easy carb add on:

Cookie

Fruit (canned or fresh)

Chips

Piece of bread

Popcorn

Crackers

Easy protein add on:

Nuts

Spoonful of nut butter

Cheese

Roasted chickpea snacks

Glass of milk (dairy or non dairy)

Small canned sausages or similar

[what-even-is-thiss]

Sugar in there.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I am pleased by people messaging me telling me that after adding a carb or protein to their snacks or meals they feel more satisfied all day. Yes, my plan is working. People are getting through their days with less hangry.

[martyredsaintofavernus]

More wine! More women!!!

[sharkflan]

on the topic of hmc i always felt bad for markl when howl was losing it over his hair like poor kids standing there with the exact same hair color

[satchihatchi]

Stobotnik on honeymoon <3

[ripleyrider]

FUCKKK THIS IS SO GOOD!!