Never Deal With A Dragon

Nerd, cat person, history buff, all of the above and more

[queenofthefullmoon]

[tikkety-tok]

[dropitlowbandit]

@fiannabeag

[julius-novachrono]

[sharkbutch]

comrade danny

[poetry-protest-pornography]

And this is why we love Danny DeVito

[yourdadsghoulfriend]

[dapenguinninja]

Me thinking all those verified accounts real silent

[omghotmemes]

big brain only

[clutzyangel]

[scallioncreamcheesebagel]

[gothicashworld]

the English Major in me loathes this but the word-play lover in me adores this

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

[tybalt-you-saucy-boi]

Kid 1: Hey what are you doing?

Kid 2: *tosses a bike in the river* I dunno I’m just fuckin tossing bikes in the river bro

[feaftlikeabeaft]

I really believed the caption was a snarky parody of what was said and not literally the actual dialogue

[tikkety-tok]

Cats are made of something different

[theocseason4]

[solitarelee]

[Transcript: a young woman with long blonde hair is speaking directly into the camera. 

“I’m gonna tell you guys something that honestly changed my life for good. So if you’re in college, and live in a dorm or an apartment, there’s a good change that a lot of people living in your dorm or apartment have an Alexa. And if you go into the hallway and yell loud enough... I’ll just show you the rest.” 

The girl is now standing in a dorm hallway. She yells at the top of her lungs: 

“Alexa! Play Fireflies!” 

There is a moment of quiet where several Alexas responding can be faintly heard. After a few seconds, Fireflies by Owl City begins to play loudly, followed a few seconds later by another starting up, then another, then another as the woman begins to walk down the hall, smiling and laughing, to a growing cacophony of Fireflies by Owl City. 

End transcript.]

[milkygastrobones]

@secret--psalms--saturn

[zenosanalytic]

[violetta-mondarev]

[dustydoodles]

i painted………………. a boy.

[post-store]

$29.99

[guooey]

when the acoustic song is a little too acoustic and I think there’s something in my house

[guooey]

[fire-is-her-water]

My doggo, Ezri, who rarely barks and mostly borks.

When I got her, she’d been abused and would cower and pee at almost everything, and had been mistreated when she’d barked, so she never would. One day months after I had her she got excited on a walk and borked at a bird, and then immediately cower-peed. I had to re-teach her to bark by gathering her whole human pack and having everyone bark and howl and feed her treats and pet her till she got excited enough to join in, and then got more treats. Took a while but I was able to teach her to bork on command (and she’s gotta be excited or she just stares at me like “Sorry, the bork system needs charging”) and she’ll do it happily when she’s excited to go for a walk or upon seeing a friend, and at birds. I love her croaky borking, especially when she started off terrified of making a joyful noise.

[merak-zoran]

[corvigae]

What kind of dog is Ezri? I love her!!

[fire-is-her-water]

I… did not expect this post to blow up this much but I am delighted at all the tags and replies and Ezri has been told the internet thinks she’s a Very Good Dog. :D

She’s a German spitz - in the same family as keeshonds and pomeranians. She might be crossed with something else as her freckled coat, non-pointy nose, and personality are not standard for her breed (they’re usually a lot more high energy and excitable - she’s super laid back and chill). She’s a bit less fluffy than breed-standard too, mostly because she’s grown out from her spring/summer trim (not usually necessary/good for her type of coat but she gets terribly itchy otherwise). It also makes her look like a puppy of a large breed:

Ezri’s best friend is Murder Cat, who is a gentle friend to humans and Ezri, but does things to mice that would make Hannibal Lecter go “Isn’t that a bit much?”

I got Murder Cat as a kitten, and she used to try to nurse on everything when she was small. Eventually, she settled on her favourite thing to nurse on, Ezri, who has never had puppies and a little confused at first but eventually went with it. She grew out of it, but they have stayed snuggly buddies ever since.

New Years here is full of fireworks outside and Ezri gets Vry Scared. I usually set her up somewhere with a snuggly spot right by me, and Murder Cat comes and does this all night: 

She goes everywhere with me in my bakfiets (cargo bike) and lets me warm my hands in her fur on cold days.

And her ears disappear if I say her name to get her attention.

ok so great thanks for coming to my TED talk about my dog, good night, drive safe

[hobbesdeep]

[junkfoodcinemas]

Hot Fuzz (2007) dir. Edgar Wright

[everythingfox]

Stride of Pride

[el-garito-deactivated20210126]

Si parpadeas te lo pierdes…

  WTF 😅😅😅

[fancy-club-hot-tub]

😂😂😂

[birdbath201]

Kookaburra

Kookaburra are exclusively carnivorous animals hunting fish, snakes, rats and the occasional barbecue sausage LOL 🥰

[lemonsharks]

Australia are you ok?

[cannibal-rainbow]

“they” (1 word) is shorter than “he or she” (3 words)

“they” is more inclusive than “he/she”

“themself” flows more naturally than “him or herself”

“they” is less clunky than “(s)he”

it’s time to replace the awkward “she or he”

[edgar-allen-potpourri]

“hey can you go ask they what does they want for dinner, and when is they coming over to watch movies with they?”

[edrec]

“Hey, can you go ask them what they want for dinner, and when they’re coming over to watch movies?”

Step one is learning how to talk like a human person.

[anghraine]

Friendly reminder:

“I shouldn’t like to punish anyone, even if they’d done me wrong.” —George Eliot, The Mill on the Floss (1860)

“A person can’t help their birth.” —William Thackeray, Vanity Fair (1848)

“But to expose the former faults of any person, without knowing what their present feelings were, seemed unjustifiable.” —Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice (1813)

“Every Fool can do as they’re bid.” —Jonathan Swift, Polite Conversation (1738)

“So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.” —King James Bible, Matthew 18:35 (transl. 1611)

“God send every one their heart’s desire!” —William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing (~1600)

“Now this king did keepe a great house, that euerie body might come and take their meat freely.” —Sir Philip Sidney, the Arcadia (1580)

“If … a psalme scape any person, or a lesson, or els yt they omyt one verse or twayne…” —William Bonde, The Pylgrimage of Perfection (1526)

“And whoso fyndeth hym out of swich blame, / They wol come up and offre a Goddés name” —Geoffrey Chaucer, The Pardoner’s Tale (~1380)

“þan hastely hiȝed eche wiȝt on hors & on fote, / huntyng wiȝt houndes alle heie wodes, / til þei neyȝþed so neiȝh to nymphe þe soþe [Then hastily hied each person on horse and on foot / hunting with hounds all the high woods / ‘til they came so near, to tell the truth]” —William and the Werwolf (transl. ~1350-1375)

“Bath ware made sun and mon, / Aiþer wit þer ouen light [Both were made sun and moon / Either with their own light]” —Cursor Mundi (~1325)

[advanced-procrastination]

We’ve been using they/them/their pronouns to indicate a person with unspecified gender for a long ass fucking time. The only reason it’s become a big issue lately is because it can be used as a semi-respectful term for trans and non-binary folks and we can’t have that can we

These fucks are literally trying to change our language to hurt trans/nb folks, and claiming that’s just the way its always been

[polyhorde]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Singular “they” predates

Singular “you”

[catchymemes]

[marlynnofmany]

This is seven seconds of stupid, and I’ve watched it five times.  Enjoy.

[cutecutejames]

sound on

[paganinpurple]

For the love of the GODS unmute

[guerrillatech]

[third-nature]

🔮 like to charge 🔮

🔥 reblog to cast 🔥

🌎 for good news on earth day 🌍

[crittizen]

ik we were on a boycott buuut

[technicallynotdeadyet]

LETS DO IT

[swordshapedleaves]