we live and breathe words

// Emma // 18 // florida // she\her // intj-a // bands and books // idek what this blog is tbh //

[pastelparrotlet]

Me: *going about my life, accomplishing normal life milestones*

My brain: There are castles for sale. In the European countryside. Buy one. Disappear. Adopt a flock of ravens. Become a local legend.

[bigspender]

me: *overestimates the length of a yellow light and completely 100% runs a red light* me while driving away: I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I

[pisboy]

labradoodles are nice and all but combining the food obsession of a lab with the intelligence of a poodle creates the ultimate stealth unit whose sole mission in life is to get into the pantry and Eliminate All Bread

[c0ffeekitten]

I’m detecting multiple stories behind this post

[ifelloffthebed]

[thegreatpuppers]

monch

[deathbars]

[dasebeleren]

Saturn Devouring His Son - Francisco Goya, 1819-1823

[rcktpwr]

i think turtles are a big threat to our national security

[swampnert-deactivated20170515]

may i ask why

[rcktpwr]

no

[memewhore]

[stability]

[tinylobelia-deactivated20200702]

[wisteriafield]

i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass

[pixiefoibles]

In response to a guy mansplaining something, just say “Impressive. Every word in that sentence was wrong.”

1) It only gets better the longer he spoke

2) Luke Skywalker would be proud

3) He’ll immediately fly to bafflement and telling you why YOU’RE wrong and HE’S right

4) Mark Hamill would be proud

[brainstatic]

I once read about an aquarium that trained the dolphins to pick up any debris in the tank and give it to the trainer in exchange for fish. One dolphin started started hiding paper under a rock and then breaking off small pieces to give the trainer. She also realized that she could get fish for catching a seagull. She soon started to stockpile fish to use as seagull bait, thus creating an exponentially larger seagull problem. Then she taught the other dolphins, which made it worse. So if you ever think dolphins are cute, remember that these little assholes create capitalism of their own volition and are not to be trusted. 

[spacehispanic]

🎃 Have a spooktacular New Year’s everybody! 🎃 

[satanstrousers]

Shes a brick

[maccydoodles]

who?

[satanstrousers]

HOUSE

[harmed]

[studiopangram]

[yesterdaysprint]

The Index-Journal, Greenwood, South Carolina, August 6, 1952

[jumpingjacktrash]

every time millennials say they have the darkest sense of humor, the cold war generations have a little giggle

[klimtsonian-unofficial]

“the cover is never as good as the origi–”