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@rottingorchid
cw: mental health blog
< 16 dni
cishet men dni
dms open but checked inconsistently
block don’t report
mood stabilizers feel like a bandaid on a gaping wound
my chest feels so tight when you say those things to me but you don’t care do you
the feeling of emptiness when even getting your ego stroked doesn’t help
everything is futile there’s no point to anything
why does it feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest
reverting to old habits is so depressing.. like wow.. i guess nothing changed .. !
everyone is letting me down… step up or step out 🗣️
wow i’m having an ok day!
wonder how long that’ll last..
will you still love me when i'm inconvenient?
i'm scared that once i no longer bring benefits to the table you'll grow distant. i don't ever want to be a burden, but i can't help it. what about when i'm ugly and demanding? i know it'll tire you, but do you love me enough to withstand it?
or do you only care when i'm pleasant
so why the fuck are people mean to me when i’m being an angel? do u want to see me split? do u want me to hate ur disgusting guts? like..
i miss being younger and just being able to rot in my depression
now i have responsibilities and a job
hey can you come over and surgically remove this heavy, aching rot from my heart? we can watch a movie afterwards
stop asking me what’s wrong. it’s everything.
so should i go to the hospital or to work
everytime i think my bpd is under control it comes back and bites me in the ass so hard
why was i so right i knew it i fucking knew it
again …
im ruining everything again because it’s my special talent
